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7 Tips for tolerating family at Holidays

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23 replies to this topic

#1
bopeep1909

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http://www.cnn.com/2....html?hpt=hp_t4

Despite feel-good messages from television, billboards and online ads, holidays are a source of conflict for millions of people. It's not uncommon to see a friend discuss an upcoming family visit with eye-rolling or deep sighs.

Families are complicated. Our feelings toward individual members can change from boredom to affection to outrage in a matter of minutes.

Many adult children dread the prospect of seeing their parents at the holidays. There may be unresolved feelings from their childhoods, and even a close relationship with a parent might become strained by the parent's divorce or remarriage, infirmity or neediness. A parent's direct or indirect disapproval of the adult child's sexuality, choice of partner, parenting practices or job choices can also bring tension for the adult child.



#2
BFP

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I think *most* things can be swept under the carpet for the few days a year that this happens. And then there are the big situations that really run deep..like heroin or other drug addicts that cannot be tolerated period. They destroy the holidays for everyone with thier manipulating ways and acute psychosis. But such is life.

#3
bopeep1909

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I think *most* things can be swept under the carpet for the few days a year that this happens. And then there are the big situations that really run deep..like heroin or other drug addicts that cannot be tolerated period. They destroy the holidays for everyone with thier manipulating ways and acute psychosis. But such is life.

If you mix alcohol to some already animosities their can sometimes be problems.



#4
the_patriot2014

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theres an eigth. Keep a loaded shotgun within eyesight and easy reach. . . .



#5
bopeep1909

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theres an eigth. Keep a loaded shotgun within eyesight and easy reach. . . .

pat  :madgrin: What am I going to do with you?



#6
other one

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theres an eigth. Keep a loaded shotgun within eyesight and easy reach. . . .

LoL  I just stick my carry .380 in my pocket.



#7
bopeep1909

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Let me know if I ever cross your path....  :17:



#8
Willamina

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You will probably all think I am awful, but I watch that movie Christmas Vacation with Chevy Chase each year to remind myself that our families have some real characters (probably us) and it won't be perfect and go the way we expected. Our hopes and dreams for the day may go awry. The prayers won't be perfect. The decorations may fail.
The 2 small dogs will be a nuscence. There may be some strange presents. Everything can get chaotic with kids chasing dogs and limited seating for 14 people. Fortunately there will be no drugs or aclohol, just pie tonight. But we can all get together to remember Christ's birth. So our sons and their families will be with us tonight. Tomarrow we plan to be with oldest son and family for dinner in a smaller home with 2 large dogs in our midst. Younger son will be with his wife's family.
This will be the first year that everyones hearts are tender toward Christ if not filled with His Presence. So it will not be as tense as our memories of past Christmases. We will leave the Christmas Eve service to the more daring and hardy. It is held in the Church's amphatheater with a huge bonfire. But we are not well enough go down the many steps in the dark and weather the freezing temperatures. So we will celebrate with family.

We don't think there will be a white Christmas this year since a Chinook (warm) wind came yesterday with 58 F degree gusts. Today will make the low 40s. But I did watch White Christmas last night because I like Bing Crosby and Danny Kay.

Christmas blessings:
Do not be afraid, for behold, I bring you good tidings of great joy which shall be to all people.
For there is born to you this day in the City of David a Savior who is Christ the Lord.
And this will be a sign to you: you will find a Babe wrapped in swaddling clothes, lying in a manger.

Glory to God in the highest,
And peace, good will toward men!
Luke 2 10-14 NKJV in part.

Love,
Willa

#9
DRS81

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I chose to go to work tomorrow.



#10
bopeep1909

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You will probably all think I am awful, but I watch that movie Christmas Vacation with Chevy Chase each year to remind myself that our families have some real characters (probably us) and it won't be perfect and go the way we expected. Our hopes and dreams for the day may go awry. The prayers won't be perfect. The decorations may fail.
The 2 small dogs will be a nuscence. There may be some strange presents. Everything can get chaotic with kids chasing dogs and limited seating for 14 people. Fortunately there will be no drugs or aclohol, just pie tonight. But we can all get together to remember Christ's birth. So our sons and their families will be with us tonight. Tomarrow we plan to be with oldest son and family for dinner in a smaller home with 2 large dogs in our midst. Younger son will be with his wife's family.
This will be the first year that everyones hearts are tender toward Christ if not filled with His Presence. So it will not be as tense as our memories of past Christmases. We will leave the Christmas Eve service to the more daring and hardy. It is held in the Church's amphatheater with a huge bonfire. But we are not well enough go down the many steps in the dark and weather the freezing temperatures. So we will celebrate with family.

We don't think there will be a white Christmas this year since a Chinook (warm) wind came yesterday with 58 F degree gusts. Today will make the low 40s. But I did watch White Christmas last night because I like Bing Crosby and Danny Kay.

Christmas blessings:
Do not be afraid, for behold, I bring you good tidings of great joy which shall be to all people.
For there is born to you this day in the City of David a Savior who is Christ the Lord.
And this will be a sign to you: you will find a Babe wrapped in swaddling clothes, lying in a manger.

Glory to God in the highest,
And peace, good will toward men!
Luke 2 10-14 NKJV in part.

Love,
Willa

It sounds like you are going to have a nice Christmas with family.That is so nice.I am not going to think you are awful because I saw that movie too and I laughed til I cried.It was so funny.I saw all the vacation movies with Chevy Chase when they came out.

I live in SW Washington and yes it is rather warm right now.It was very,very cold a couple of weeks ago.It was 10 degrees here.Merry Christmas to you and your family Willa. :mgcheerful:



#11
bopeep1909

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I chose to go to work tomorrow.

Double time or time and 1/2?That is nice for the pocketbook.



#12
DRS81

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I chose to go to work tomorrow.

Double time or time and 1/2?That is nice for the pocketbook.

 

 

time and 1/2.



#13
bopeep1909

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I chose to go to work tomorrow.

Double time or time and 1/2?That is nice for the pocketbook.

 

 

time and 1/2.

 

Nice....  :mgcheerful:



#14
the_patriot2014

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theres an eigth. Keep a loaded shotgun within eyesight and easy reach. . . .

pat  :madgrin: What am I going to do with you?

Believe me your not the first to ask that question lol

#15
other one

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I chose to go to work tomorrow.

back in my television days I used to have to work all holidays.  several years I had a diet coke and a hershey chocolate bar for lunch

 

In my Xerox days we used to either have to work Christmas or Thanksgiving.   We did get triple time though and you had to take all calls for 24 hours so it made a good sized chunk of overtime in the check.  None of us complained much.



#16
bopeep1909

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I chose to go to work tomorrow.

back in my television days I used to have to work all holidays.  several years I had a diet coke and a hershey chocolate bar for lunch

 

In my Xerox days we used to either have to work Christmas or Thanksgiving.   We did get triple time though and you had to take all calls for 24 hours so it made a good sized chunk of overtime in the check.  None of us complained much.

 

Yes,I know a guy who has worked for Xerox for years.Nice benefits and pay.



#17
walla299

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I chose to go to work tomorrow.

 

Time & a half works. :thumbsup: :)

 

My family is scattered over 3 continents at last count, so there won't be any get together. The work schedule worked out so that I wound up working Christmas this year. There's some service work I'd rather be doing tommorow, but such is life.



#18
other one

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I chose to go to work tomorrow.

back in my television days I used to have to work all holidays.  several years I had a diet coke and a hershey chocolate bar for lunch

 

In my Xerox days we used to either have to work Christmas or Thanksgiving.   We did get triple time though and you had to take all calls for 24 hours so it made a good sized chunk of overtime in the check.  None of us complained much.

 

Yes,I know a guy who has worked for Xerox for years.Nice benefits and pay.

 

ask him if he ever went to school with a Sam from Oklahoma.



#19
bopeep1909

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I chose to go to work tomorrow.

back in my television days I used to have to work all holidays.  several years I had a diet coke and a hershey chocolate bar for lunch

 

In my Xerox days we used to either have to work Christmas or Thanksgiving.   We did get triple time though and you had to take all calls for 24 hours so it made a good sized chunk of overtime in the check.  None of us complained much.

 

Yes,I know a guy who has worked for Xerox for years.Nice benefits and pay.

 

ask him if he ever went to school with a Sam from Oklahoma.

 

I will.Did you guys all go to the same school for training?



#20
other one

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I chose to go to work tomorrow.

back in my television days I used to have to work all holidays.  several years I had a diet coke and a hershey chocolate bar for lunch

 

In my Xerox days we used to either have to work Christmas or Thanksgiving.   We did get triple time though and you had to take all calls for 24 hours so it made a good sized chunk of overtime in the check.  None of us complained much.

 

Yes,I know a guy who has worked for Xerox for years.Nice benefits and pay.

 

ask him if he ever went to school with a Sam from Oklahoma.

 

I will.Did you guys all go to the same school for training?

 

For many many years all of our training nation wide was at our center about 7 miles east of Leesburg Va.

 

PC140013_zpsf9ea08e9.jpg

 

It was a totally self sustaining 1800 student training center that all training was done in.....   was built in the middle of a two thousand acre game reserve and that is the Potomac River.   It has all been built up around it now and we sold it to I believe Mariot.   It's a convention center now...    but back when it was all ours it was an awesome place to go.   I have walked down to the river to fish more times than I can remember.    Over my career (38 years) I've probably spent at least a year there in various classes and seminars, some as long as 7 or 8 weeks.   Thousands upon thousands of Xeroids have met there and made acquaintances and some even good friends over the years.  

 

We set up some regional training in the late 90's and fazed out the center.   The cool part about it also was that it isn't very far from Washington DC.   We spent a lot of time in DC and the surrounding area's historical sites.






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