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So what do you do when you realize you are leaving your first love?

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9 replies to this topic

#1
19Duggarfan

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Finding myself leaving my First Love, Revelations 2:3-4; and really having trouble regaining it.  My heart just doesn't burn with a desire for God as it should.



#2
Joshua-777

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I went through this one time, one thing that caused it was I didn't know I could grow deeper in relationship with Him. When we worship, we pray, we read His word, if it doesn't lead to an encounter with Him then it becomes very easy to lose our first love, or fall in love with a practice rather then Him. There is a point to pressing in, you can know Him more and more. There is so much depth in Him, we can always go deeper and become more and more intimate.

 

We can encounter Him, we can experience Him. When I press in, I know I'm going to encounter Him in some way and the more I seek Him in the secret place, the more I see Him move in every day life. That excitement, that fire, that passion comes from spending time in His presence, from abiding in Him. The more I experience Him, the more I fall in love with Him. His words become tangible reality as we come to know Him more and more.

 

One way to break free is to keep seeking after Him, even when you don't feel like it, even when you feel run down or worn out, keep seeking to know Him. He is a rewarder for those who diligently seek Him (Hebrews 11:6) and expect to encounter him.



#3
OneLight

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I call these time a "dry spell" when I have to walk more and more by faith.  It is not easy, but it is a huge learning experience, only realized when we have gone through it and have come out the other side.  These testing times are very important to our growth in Christ. 

 

I remember the first time I felt this way, it was explained to me that the feeling is the same when you are a baby, taking your first steps without the help of anyone.  A child will fear fear, uncertainty, confusion, discouragement, courage, excitement, anxiety, but still continues to walk forward, to the open arms of the one waiting.

 

Hang in there, and worship God, for it will pass if you continue in faith.  To give up know would be very disastrous to your relationship with Him, not that He will turn away, but the guilt and shame for giving up will feel like a ton of bricks hitting you all at once..



#4
Atwood

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The Ephesian Church had that problem when Rev was written. Note how Paul prayed for them on the same subject in Ephesians 3. There the human responsibilty is fulfilled by faith (Christ dwells in the heart by faith). We love Him because He first loved us. How about reading and marking the God-loves-us passages & meditating on them: The love of Christ constrains us.

#5
bopeep1909

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When I was a kid my brother used to stand behind me and say "just fall back I will catch you,now don't look back just trust me".That was very,very hard to do.If I fell back and he moved I would get hurt and fall to the ground. :mgcheerful: You have to know that God is there.That is faith.



#6
kwikphilly

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Blessings Duggar

     I agree wholeheartedly with One Light & as he calls them "dry spells",I call them "silent times" ,,,,these times call for diligence & discipline and it can be a real leap forward in growth & maturity or you can slip back and you do not really want to do that,it can easily lead you into transgression...

      When I found my fire diminishing & that lack of spark & passion,I get into serious praise & worship,we know from Gods Word that he inhabits our praise & Duggar,no matter even if I had to halfheartedly force myself to praise,the more I praise God & would go on my knees with my face on the ground & start getting to that place of very deep worship,,,,,,really submitting everything of myself to my King,I am always elevated to a higher height .....it sweetens our soul,our sensitivity to the Holy Spirit heightens and our physicality decreases..................the Holy Spirit will melt the layers beginning to encase your heart and you can once again be receptive to His love.......... Gods Presence will ignite that love inside of you,,,,,,

      Praise & Worship helps you to walk in spirit,when you cannot feel your own passion for God it is a sure sign that you are walking in the flesh........our hearts & minds are unreliable and undependable,,,,in spirit we are free to receive the heart & mind of Christ,which is love.....

       I will keep you in prayer,we cannot do anything ourselves,,,,not even really love.He will help you if you fully surrender.................maybe with all the stress you have been under you are too focused on things other than the Lord ................forsake everything temporal & focus on the Lord & what is eternal...........first thing in the morning start the day with Praising,God First

                                                                                                                                                                 With love-in Christ,Kwik



#7
Rustyangel

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What my sister Kwik said.  We all have those times, when  nothing seems to happen when we pray or when we just sit and wait.  

 

We have however our Savior promise to never leave us through the dark, dry, silent times that He said "I will never leave you or forsake you".  Bopeep said it best when she said to just fall into the Fathers arms with the full assurance that He will catch you.  Also may I suggest not always expect to feel something. Our feelings fail us but God's promise never will.  Hold on.  The bible says, Weeping endures for the night but joy comes in the morning.   we love you.

 

Because He Lives ! Rustyangel



#8
Littlelambseativy

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Look around , now, the past year and years before and see where God was and how he carried you in the tough times and lead you into the high times when you may have gone without thanking Him. He was and is with you even tho' you may feel His absence. In those times turn to the old gospel songs that help reunite you with your first Love, Jesus.

#9
Willa

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Start by thanking God for dying for you and for every answered prayer. Make a list that you can go back to and review. It is a monument to the Lord.
I no longer sing "I love you" over and over. That is infatuation. My love is insignificant when comapred to His.

I compare my walk with God to my marriage, since they grew as one.. At first it was filled with passion and excitement, but that quickly cooled as trials came and I saw a side of hubby I had never seen. I learned that he was not a genuine Christian, he lost his job, my promise of going to college was destroyed--lots of trials.
So my relationship with God was also full of overwhelming emotion and praise for a while. But that also cooled with trials and disappointments. There were many dry spells when I felt cut off from both. I felt like God was hiding from me and that hubby was avoiding me. Yet I was determined to stick it out in my marriage and I knew I could not do it without God's help. I desperately looked everywhere for God. He was still beside me but was not speaking to me. So I concluded that He wanted me to keep on doing the things I knew He wanted me to do.

I even thought If I started over with God, just as though I had never been saved, I would regain that first joy. But the truth was that the little foxes were spoiling the vine. A little spiritural pride, a little self righteousness, a critical spirit, and I was blind to the problems. So I felt like Job for some time. God had to strip me down to nothing to get me established on a firm foundation. In its place He recreated a new person and restored even more to me than I had before. I learned obedience through the things that I suffered, to walk quietly before God and my husband, and even to submit my mouth to God. And because of it all God also made me into a better wife. He reminded me of the good I first saw in hubby, the gentle spirit, the fun of water fights, the adventure of exploring mountain roads, the way we just enjoyed each others company.

Hubby now says that it is because of me that our marriage endured. I don't see it, but I do know that I prayed night and day for 4 years. God gave me faith for his salvation. I was praying "Lord, give me this mountain--the one with the giants," because it seemed so impossible that he would be saved. But I chose to trust not in what I saw, but in the promises of God, that He could even use the rotten things he was doing to save him.

So as my trust in God grew and endured much, so also my committment to my husband grew deeper in spite of what I endured. Love is expressed by commitment. Faith is clinging to, trusting in and relying upon. They go hand in hand. I could not trust my husband or any human to help. All let me down.. But God was faithful and saved hubby. God changed him into a wonderful example for our sons over time. He is now the human I rely on most, but I know it is God in him that I rely on because I know what he is without God. Both my relationship with God and with my hubby have been tested and tried, and may continue to be as our health is not good. But I know I can rely on God.

So relationships change, grow and can become much stronger. It depends on how you respond. Will you rely on His word and dig into it to hang on to His promises that He will never leave you so that they become a part of your life? Or will you just be a thrill seaker looking for excitement and great worship experiences? Will you let your roots grow deep into God's love and faithfulness, not looking for emotion but even enduring chastening? Today I pray Lord, just hide me in the cleft of the Rock. I don't want to be on a mountain top of emotion. I don't even want to fall into the valley of the shadow of death, in spite of the still waters and lushness. Predators and dangers lurk there. Just hide me in Jesus and let me cling to Him.

Believe me, today I cannot sing an old hymn of worship without weeping with joy. We have endured much so each word has more meaning now than ever before. Crown Him with many crowns, the Lamb upon the throne! Worthy is the Lamb Who was slain, holy holy is He. He walks with me and He talks with me, and tells me I am His own. -- Look full in His wonderful face, and the things of earth shall grow strangely dim in the light of His glory and grace. Because He lives, I can face tomarrow. Because He lives, all fear is gone. Because I know Who holds the future, and life is worth the living, just because He lives!

#10
Butero

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We follow God by faith, not by feelings.  I would use the same term that One Light did, "dry spell," to describe things.  That will happen from time to time.  There will be periods where you feel very close to God, and his presence will be intense, and there will be times where he will feel distant.  Perhaps you should read Song Of Solomon?  You want to be close to God, but he feels distant.  Even if you don't think so, he is still there, and he knows everything that is going on in your life, even during those times.  It is kind of like the old "Footprints In The Sand" poem.  You think God is not there, but he is actually carrying you.  I don't think you lost your first love.  I believe you are just going through a time where you don't feel God's presence as strong.  I look at that as a test of our faith. 






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