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The Loner

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The Loner

    Recently, Ive been reading a lot of western novels (I know, me, read westerns) And I got to thinking, you know, there are a lot of different "characters" or types of people, in these novels, that all go together, to make the story real, and then I thought, I wondered what would happen, if I made a comparison of these different types of people, to people in the church today, and if it would be relevant. And keep in mind, many of these types, intermix, and share characteristics, and many people change from one to another. They all have strengths, and weaknesses, and when combined can make for a well oiled church. I am going to start a series, discussing these different types of people, their strengths, their weaknesses, and how they can help others, and how to help them.

    The one I'm going to discuss today is "the loner". The loner, is someone who tends to avoid other people, to avoid hurt. In the novels, hes often a hermit, or someone who sticks to himself, often because of some past hurt, loss of a loved one, a fortune, or just burned by to many people. The person is often quiet, stays out of the way and no one thinks twice about them, but usually ends up playing some vital part in the story. Often, this person comes to the realization that they cant hide from all their problems, and there are more important things and people need help, and they come out and save the day.

    The modern day loner, like the ones in the books, tend to carry around a lot of pain, and a lot of baggage, and like the ones in the books, their answer to dealing with it, is basically to retreat inside themselves. They may attend church for awhile, but usually, end up forsaking the church. The pain comes from many sources, personal life, loss of a loved one, sometimes mental issues, and often, even from the church, and their answer is to retreat within themselves. If they are in church they are hiding alone in a back pew, or at home listening to a TV preacher. They have a hard time seeing past the pain and the hurt, and they have grown to not see any good in others.

    Now, they also, usually have big hearts and can be very caring people, they have often been through tough things, and can relate to others, and really be a great person to have in the church family, just for that very reason, but reaching them can be tough. They need to know that they are not alone, and that they are loved, and encouraged to reach out for help, that even though the church isnt perfect it is there for them. It often takes a lot of patience, and prayer, to reach this kind of person, but once you get them on your side, just like in the novels, they can play a instrumental role in your church, and can literally, move mountains. They often work behind the scenes, helping others that feel alone.  Their experience with pain, can be both their greatest weakness-but also their greatest strength.

    Each "loner" is different, about the best advice that can be applied all around, is to pray for them, and love on them, and listen to them, and be very encouraging. Beyond that, each ones different, but will take patience, and a lot of love to earn their trust. Once you do, you will not regret it. And if you are a loner reading this, please, remember, that God does love you, and promises to be there for you-if you let him. And please, I realize the church maybe hurtful, but it does need you, and the talents you alone can provide. Its tough, but try to look for the good in people, remember, God loves you!

Here are some comforting verses, that may come as comfort to "the loner" in your life. All verses are taken out of the KJV

Deuteronomy 31:6
6 Be strong and of a good courage, fear not, nor be afraid of them: for the Lord thy God, he it is that doth go with thee; he will not fail thee, nor forsake thee.

Psalm 91:15
15 He shall call upon me, and I will answer him: I will be with him in trouble; I will deliver him, and honour him.

Psalm 94:17-18
17 Unless the Lord had been my help, my soul had almost dwelt in silence.
18 When I said, My foot slippeth; thy mercy, O Lord, held me up.

Isaiah 43:1-5 
43 But now thus saith the Lord that created thee, O Jacob, and he that formed thee, O Israel, Fear not: for I have redeemed thee, I have called thee by thy name; thou art mine.
2 When thou passest through the waters, I will be with thee; and through the rivers, they shall not overflow thee: when thou walkest through the fire, thou shalt not be burned; neither shall the flame kindle upon thee.
3 For I am the Lord thy God, the Holy One of Israel, thy Saviour: I gave Egypt for thy ransom, Ethiopia and Seba for thee.
4 Since thou wast precious in my sight, thou hast been honourable, and I have loved thee: therefore will I give men for thee, and people for thy life.
5 Fear not: for I am with thee: I will bring thy seed from the east, and gather thee from the west;

Matthew 28:20
20 Teaching them to observe all things whatsoever I have commanded you: and, lo, I am with you always, even unto the end of the world. Amen.

John 14:18
18 I will not leave you comfortless: I will come to you

1 Timothy 4:16-17
16 At my first answer no man stood with me, but all men forsook me: I pray God that it may not be laid to their charge.
17 Notwithstanding the Lord stood with me, and strengthened me; that by me the preaching might be fully known, and that all the Gentiles might hear: and I was delivered out of the mouth of 


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Guest Robert


Really well written, and with a lot of prayer and thought behind it. :)

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awwwh you gone n made me cry as its me to a tee, although i work hard on seeing the good in people otherwise i would disappear from site i reckon!

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"The Loner" was a TV series starring Lloyd Bridges as former Union soldier William Colton, a man who rides through the West trying to find himself and helping out people with their problems along the way after the end of the Civil War.               


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Your article made me think that we are all loners in the sense that......  we are all looking to connect with others and especially Our Lords' Will, that we have estranged.

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Hi Patriot2017, I see that you shared this a while back. It was good to read. Thanks for sharing it.

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This has been written for some time, but this piece of what Pat has written here is "timeless". I would say what he has written is indeed insightful and (not but) i like to add. I think, there is "the loner" inside each of us; just to a different degree, just like what Pat has said, "each loner is different". There is part of us where we would want to be "left alone". There are some "loners" out there who do not hide themselves physically from people at all. They laugh, joke, voice out their opinions and well they may even be one who takes the centre stage or are often, (if not always) , the centre of attention. These people often make their presence felt, it seems like they "have it all", but nothing is further from the truth. Behind the scenes, they fight their own battles in life, where they silently struggle, their battles unknown to many. These type of loner understands for they usually have the best of both worlds; putting some part of themselves "out there" and some part locked "in there". Perhaps this is true for the majority of us. I am one such person. Now going back to pat's article... oh i certainly agree that once we reach out to the loners or "hermits", as they are often described, we would be amazed at what they have to offer. I personally have had and still have the experience of reaching out to them. More often than not, they become the source of comfort or a pillar of strength for me instead! They amaze me with their intelligence and "who would have thought they actually have deep understandings on matters that even "normal everyday people" are not aware of. And yes, as reserved or as expressionless they seem on the outside, they have a broken, battered heart that is filled with emphaty, compassion, love and understanding within them. (i could add more adjectives here.. but we all get the point). When chanelled correctly, they can indeed be an instrument that God can use to richly bless others. I personally can say they have been such a blessing for me in my life. God can use anyone living under any condition or circumstance to impact people's lives at any place, any time. To these loners who has deeply enrich my life, i take this opportunity to praise God and thank you from the bottom of my battered and broken heart for being there for me, for noticing me, for being my guiding light. 

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On 6/8/2016 at 9:45 PM, Warrior of Jesus said:

Sounds like someone I know. It is really good. I will share this to them. Please write more posts like this. :)

Hey Patriot, I agree with Warrior. Thanks for sharing. :) 

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On 12/16/2016 at 4:53 PM, Unit 11 said:

I'd like to know where you got this information about loners. Thanks...

 sorry for the late reply, Some from personal experience, I tend to be a loner, others from observations of those around me. I am no psycologist, this, and the following blogs are not from a "professional" standpoint by any stretch, they are merely my thoughts, experiences and observations of people in my life. 

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Thank you for sharing and writing this Patriot2017.

I am definitely a loner due to abuse as a child and suffering from long term PTSD. In addition, I'm an introvert. So it comes natural for me to stand back instead of intermingle and participate in a group or groups of people.

I do best one on one. Though I found I taught Sunday School classes for children quite well because of my artistic, music, and writing abilities. Many times I learned to combine all of them for a lesson.

And because I am a one on one type person, many people come up to me and pour out their hearts with their problems. I've always found this intriguing because I'm suffering as well yet they don't seem to notice. Then I'm drawn to intercede for them in prayer.


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