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well, i don't recall you saying he was enrolled in college. no friends? he's 23, he's good looking, he goes to church, he apparently gets out of the house occasionally or he wouldn't have met a girl. either he's currently enrolled in college or he was at one point. and yet he has no friends. why? it doesn't matter. i'm going to leave this to someone else. you've made up your mind, you have all kinds of excuses for not stepping up to the plate and making him be a man, and i don't know what else to say, other than quit complaining. you've made your choice to enable him. that's on your shoulders, not his. if you TRULY want to parent an adult child, you'll make him grow up. but the problem is, you've suffered loss in your life and are dealing with your own abandonment issues, and you don't WANT him to grow up and leave you. that's not a healthy kind of love. perhaps you have counseling services through your church that you can take advantage of. i know that's not easy to hear, but you really do need some assistance here... to learn how to deal with the loss of your husband, to help you learn how to let go of your son.

Perhaps inducement and conviction to give one's life to God .... Heaven is forever, too.

he's a 23 year old who has never HAD to grow up. listen, i'm not meaning this to sound mean, but mom, cut the apron strings. tell him he has a month to find a new place to live. he is never going to support himself until you make him HAVE to. he can do this, he can get a minimum wage job and rent a room from someone. or he can possibly find a live in job where he's offered room and board in exchange for his work. but YOU have to put your foot down. it's called tough love. i know you were actually looking for advice on what to do about the girl situation, but that's not your call. he's an adult, even if he's acting like a child. don't TREAT him like a child! that's exactly what you do when you try to manage his social life. (it's also what you are doing by allowing him to continue living at home.) by the way, why is he even allowed to use your car, your gas, your money? CUT HIM OFF. it's time to let him go. i suspect it will be a more difficult transition for you than for him, but your little boy is all grown up now. treat him like a man and demand he act like one too.

the only condemnation from God is the condemnation of eternal separation from Him that occurs ONLY to those who reject His gift of salvation. come on, you don't know this stuff? CONVICTION is of the Holy Spirit. condemnation is of satan. and i didn't think for a second you would apologize. i didn't even suggest you do so. i just suggested you express a little less condemnation and express a little more grace. how funny you accuse us of sounding like athiests on a liberal blog. i was thinking you're beginning to sound like you'd fit in with the westboro baptist nuts.

I second these thoughts. Isaiah 5:20 Woe unto them that call evil good, and good evil; that put darkness for light, and light for darkness; that put bitter for sweet, and sweet for bitter!