LisaMarie savedbygrace

Expectations....Most of us have them don't we?? No matter what kind of a relationship it is.. whether it be family, friend, spouse, lovers, and even work related.. We seem to think that people should automatically know how to treat us, how to fulfill our needs and when and how to do it..But the truth of the matter is ..most people don't..Not for lack of love for us or anything like that but simply because most of us treat and deal with each other the way we would expect them to treat and deal with us. I think we sometimes think "If I would do this for you then why didn't you do this for me".. It can lead to alot of disappointment and sometimes alot of it is unnecessary.. I have been finding in my own life how I would expect others to "just know" and when I see that they didn't it disappointed me and at times really broke my heart.. But could have most of that disappointment been avoided?? Yes, I believe it could have.. No matter how close of a relationship you have with someone the more crucial communication comes into play. And all the "assuming" needs to end.. You can't keep assuming that someone is going to know exactly how to treat you and what to do for you to keep you happy and to meet your needs.. Unless you communicate that.. We do teach people how to treat us whether we are aware of that or not.. And even if they are aware there will still be some areas in which they cannot deliver.. Whether it's a matter of them not being built that way .. meaning they just don't think that way.. what works for one doesn't always work for another and until we learn to want to understand who these people are that we find ourselves in relationships with, then we will always have some sort of disappointment with them .. No one is a mind reader and no one thinks exactly as we do ... Having expectations in general isn't always a bad thing..For we do expect to be treated well, and with respect.. But when your expectations are up way too high and you're not focused or even remotely interested in knowing about the person you're around then you may need to make some adjustments and/or learn how to think differently about the matter.. Maybe not be so inclined to always have your needs met all the time..You may not know it but just because we all have needs doesn't mean they are the same.. Some of us require more security than others.. some of us like to have more alone time, some like to not be alone..whatever the case may be.. it is up to the individual to communicate and compromise. Relationships of all kinds take work.. Just because you're committed doesn't mean it's easy.. Just because you're family doesn't mean they truly know you .. etc..What's important to you ..may not be important to them.. We have to stop expecting people to be more like us and respect them for who they are We all grow,we're all learning and we all change and go through changes.. it's about being real and being open to those changes and truly taking the time to understand one another.. Life doesn't have to be complicated... so why make it that way...

I heard a remake of this some time ago.. wish i could remember who did it .. but i absolutely love it.. ))

For me it is a soft voice that I hear in my gut.. sometimes it's just a knowing feeling not so much words..

Great reminder ...Thank you Fez )

Wow!!! Amazing.. it gave me chills ))))))

That was beautiful ... ))) and Enoob..LOL... you are too funny .. love the photo work

..Bahahahaaa.. thanxs for the laugh Patriot... WOW!!!

Really wish I could give you a quick fix.. but I too deal hard in this area.. Been learning a thing or 2 and have been making progress but have to admit there are those days when i truly wish to crawl under a rock.. The best way I can say it is when you get that negative thought.. you need to quickly dismiss it... just tell yourself that you do not accept it.. you may have to do this many times during the day .. The enemy certainly knows what buttons to push and i hate to admit it but there have been times when i have listened to them and even for a minute believed them.. Sometimes they get so overwhelming strong that it takes all i have to get it under some sort of control.. Usually some good music to take your mind off of what you're thinking can help.. But with what you said about focusing on the good things and the Word is definitely a step in the right direction in purifying your heart and getting control over your thought.. The mind is very much a battlefield but with anything that you give practice to it does get easier..

I used to believe that when praying I had to always kneel and use all kinds of eloquent speech.. Granted kneeling is being respectful and i understand that.. But I talk to Him as if i was talking to anyone else.wherever and whenever i can ... I am learning more and more to let Him into every area instead of just certain things..

I love it.. thank you for sharing that )

Nitish... if you have something on your heart that you wish to share ..then share it... There will always be an opinion thrown no matter what you say or do.. You can't let what might be taken the wrong way silence you.. If you truly feel it will edify, encourage or what have you then by all means share it.. I haven't found anything you have said to be offensive ..

another inspiring message .. thank you for sharing.. I needed this .

Same here.. thank you for sharing that Nitish..

Thank you, Lisa Marie! One thing that came out of it all is compassion for others. And that is one of the best qualities to have ... ))

I read some of the comments but not all... I can truly relate to how you are feeling .. when I was younger I got picked on, made fun of, called alot of not so nice names for the way I looked... My skin wasn't in the greatest of conditions and when i was about 7 i had to get glasses and at that time my mother could only afford the cheapest and well they were not only the cheapest but the worst.. They were thick and just so awful... as i grew older i still could hear all that negative talk in my head and actually believed it for so many yrs.. To this day I have struggled .. But i do believe God is working in me.. People learn what they live and I truly believe it all begins in the home.. what they see and how they themselves are treated plays a big role in their behavior. It angers me to no end that we still go by appearances..Most people won't take the time to even say hello if you don't look a certain way.. And the media well.. don't even get me started there... Anyway.. I was able to discuss my hurts with some true friends and I do remember one telling me.. Find at least one thing you like about yourself and focus on that ..Well at the time it was my eyes.. Believe it or not.. after my glasses came off and I got contacts I felt a little more better about me but not quite as much as i wanted.. I could imagine myself as this not overly but confident , fun loving girl who loved meeting new people.. was always laughing and having a great time.. Would even watch movies and see how the actresses acted and tried to imitate them... It didn't take long until i found out that wasn't working.. For yrs I struggled to know who i was and did all i could to reinvent someone .. but that someone never felt right.. Then God got a hold of me.. He is still working in my life..but he is showing me how much He loves me and how valuable and precious I am to Him.. As are you.. You are the apple of God's eye and you are His creation.. There are qualities about you that NO ONE else possesses .. there are talents and gifts you have that only you can do .. You are here for Him.....no one else... . Not everyone is going to like us...they will find reason to ridicule, judge, put down and bully... thinking it makes them feel better about who they are.. I am learning to feel sorry for these people instead of hatred for they are broken themselves... I am sure you are filled with so many great things and with those things you will make such a difference in many lives... A pretty face doesn't always make a pretty heart.. But when you know that you are loved by God and when that love resonates deep within you that beauty will shine out of you .. God bless you ..