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EllisBelle

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  1. Thank you so much to everyone who took the time to comment. To address some of Ezra's great points, my husband and I have said that we are truly deciding between two excellent churches. The second church sends mission groups across the world regularly to reach non-believers and is heavily involved in providing assistance to people in our own city. However, the pastor has only been at their church for a few months. Some of the people we met with the other night (who have all attended the church for years, some their whole lives), have expressed that they are somewhat ambivalent about him, feel he's had to "grow on them," and that they stay because of the strong, passionate community they have at the church. And that they support the foundation and mission of the church. And to answer Ezra's question, I think that the problem would be a heavy emphasis on sermonizing if I'm understanding the term correctly (topic of the day, selected biblical quotes to back up stance on topic). After reading Marilyn C's post last night I started to look into how important fellowship was and is in the Christian life. And this morning I randomly put on one of the first pastor's sermons and it happened to be about how vital it is that Christians get plugged into the fellowship at their church. So I feel like I am being led in the direction that this will be very important to advance our spiritual maturity. Which somewhat answers my prayers asking God how important it is for us to be connected to other people at our church (a serious pondering of mine since both my husband and I would naturally like to remain somewhat independent from others around us- both introverts, him more so than me). However, it doesn't really resolve the "where" question for me. I'm left with more prayer on that topic, and the sense that if we remain at "church one" we will really have to make the effort to extend ourselves to become connected (though I'm not sure how much I can force someone to hang out with us if they don't want to) or look outside of our age/life experience peers there. The other option is to show pastor two the same grace that his church appears to be showing him in allowing him to get his "sea legs" and hopefully become a more influential shepherd of their flock. Sorry once again that my ramblings were so long.
  2. I am struggling with where to have my family attend church- essentially deciding between two churches. As background- my husband, my toddler son and I moved to a new area of our state last year. When we were living in our previous city, we were not regularly attending church for a number of reasons, though my husband and I have been Christians for all of our adult life. In our new city, a neighbor of ours encouraged me to attend a Christian mothers group with her, and I loved it. I got heavily involved with the organization, was asked to become one of the leaders in the group and started attending church where the group is held. I really connected with the style and message of the pastor at that church, so much so that I listen to his previous sermons as I do household chores, etc. My son loves their Sunday school program (as far as we can tell... he's 3 now lol), and my husband also likes attending. Sounds great, however, I feel like we have stalled a bit. The women who attend that church (and who I know through the mom's organization) are not extremely welcoming and inviting. I've tried to break into that "inner circle" with not a ton of luck. Super sweet, but they just don't include me on things outside of our organization activities. I feel like as a result, my husband has been unable to get plugged into the church. Basically, he is a Christian, will attend church with me, raise our children (we have since had a second child) in the faith, but is not comfortable attending a men's group or small group due to his extremely introvert nature. So, I have casual friendships through the organization, we attend church on Sundays, but we aren't really establishing fellowship bonds there. Another woman I know through the mother's group unprompted encouraged me to try her church for one Sunday (my neighbor who initially invited me to the group also attends this other church). I listened to some past sermons online... and was not... moved? But I told myself I am not in the position to judge the pastor or the message, to just take it as a pathway to God. We hesitantly went this last Sunday. My son did great in the Sunday school (and as an aside, he will be attending preschool at this church next year, once again, for a myriad of reasons). And when we were leaving church, we were immediately invited to join a group of young families who were hanging out and catching up outside the church. As we all stood around chatting, everyone decided to meet up later that evening for a park playdate and dinner. It was awesome! My son played with other kids, my husband had some great chats with fellow men of God (first time in a LONG time), some of the ladies helped me with my infant son. We laughed, had fun. It was exhilarating. But still, the message and style of the pastor did not connect with us. I'm trying not to get into too many specifics so I don't get into a space where I am critiquing the pastor, it was just a stark difference from the encounter with God we experience through how the other pastor relays the word of God. What should we do? Is there any scripture that could help me discern God's direction for us? I have been praying about it for a while, and I still don't feel like I have a clear path for us. I am so confused and lost. I'm sorry this was so long. Thank you for anyone who read through it
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