RK98

I think that it's ok to ask God to prove himself. You're taking a big gamble if you don't have proof. It's not much to ask for in return for your dedication. It's pretty sad to make us follow him or else we'll in hell forever... that's just really sad. I just want to know if he's really real before I give up my everything. It's not too much to ask for; it's logical. If God is really real then he knows what I've been through and have had to suffer so far in my life, then I think he'd understand were I'm coming from. He's supposed to be loving and caring ya know? Wouldn't a loving and caring God answer your prayers? Wouldn't he love to give someone like me closure? If he did this then I'd be a follower and I'd probably give him my everything. It's a win win for him ya know?

I'm really depressed, stressed and anxious. I'm only eighteen years old but I feel like I've lived a lifetime. I feel well beyond my age...I feel old. So much negative things have happened in my life up until this point. Bad thing after bad thing...it just doesn't stop. I keep waiting for a break but I never really get one. I've been a Christian in the past but through that period of my life, which was ten years, my life didn't get any better, in fact it got worse, so my faith got less and less strong. This resulted in me questioning God a couple years back, questioning life and everything in it, which led to an existential crisis and me leaving Church and God. Every-day I get worse and worse. I feel like I'm dying day-after-day. I'm at my breaking point. I can't take this anymore. I don't know if God is really real anymore, I need proof. I plan on fasting everything: technology, food etcetera and just push into him by reading his word and praying. I want God to show me that he is real by giving me a full beard...like one day in my fast I'll just wake up with a massive full beard (I don't really have facial hair so hence the beard). This is my way of knowing whether God is really real or not. I don't plan on stoping the fast until this happens. If I die, then I die. But I just really need this, I need to know if he's really real. I need something to live for. I need meaning and purpose in my life. Nothing feels real anymore, the world around me and the people in it. I just need to know that God is real, that he's really real. Do you think this will work?