Micah collins

To address the fact that I don't account for everything in my diatribes. Multiple times i have posted long diatribes only for someone to come in and point out something wrong. When this happens i will try to respond to the criticism but try to be patient as i have social anxiety and so it may take a while before i manage to read your response and i may not respond to everything at once. I'm posting this to try to be as transparent as possible in case this situation arises again.

I was reading and yeah I honestly don't actually believe any of this. This is kind of embarrassing uh I was feeling really emotional because of a disscution with my grandfather so I figured if I could go through the motions I might be able to convince myself that any of it is true but honestly I'm still an athiest I will continue to search for the truth but for now I have decided it's better to be honest with myself and others about what my beliefs are. If this has taught me anything it's that forcing yourself to believe something doesn't work and only backfires in the long run. I tried forcing myself to watch answers in genesis for a while and suppress my grievances. However that ultimately backfired as my issues came all at once and I now can't stand Ken ham anymore nor most other Christian groups. I don't like the things they say about gay people. I don't like their politics and I don't like how irrational they often are.

This is my basic understanding of the different views of the christian afterlife. immediately After death you no longer have a physical body so your purely spiritual according to most christian denominations you reside with God if you were a believer and in tartarus if you were not. in some denominations you are simply unconscious after death. then comes the resurrection when resurrected the believers go to heaven while those who werent go to hell. the exact nature of heaven and hell is another topic.

Today i've decided to become a christian again and have once again started to listen to christian media but i personally feel conflicted and im struggling as ive been an atheist for almost 3 years now.