I'm in deep need of prayer please. I just started school (University or some call it college) a few weeks ago. I have social anxiety. At first the school wasnt so packed so it was pretty empty. I assumed it would stay that way until this week everyone is slowly starting their courses and just seeing so many people its making me so nervous. Its Friday night here and school is only Monday's and Tuesdays. But even now I am so anxious about it and I notice i hyperventilate a bit and it's not even Monday lol Also, I know I have depression as I have struggled with suicide since 2004ish. I am with a mental health service, but they only know about my Paranoid Schizophrenia side, not the depression side. They have asked questions here and there if I've felt sad or suicidal but I either just gave half truths or just said I was okay. My cousin said she noticed a cycle happening and it was like i would get depressed and suicidal every week, once a week. I am actually being discharged from the mental health services and this will be our last meeting with my GP to tell her and confirm that I will be under her care, of course, will still be taking my medication. But now that all this is on my shoulders I know it's time to speak up cause the suicidal moments are only getting worse. I HATE talking about it infront of my parents because I dont want them to hurt. It's hard for me to talk about my suicidal and depressed moments with people I am not very close to, for example my psychiatrist etc. But I know if I don't bring it up now then I might never get any better from this. Please pray for me as I am desperate. Even now I feel like crying because I can see the hurt in my dads eyes when he hears that although God is healing me, I still need help but this time with depression.
Thank you all & Gbu All