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About dr3032

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  1. When it comes to me, I had a few experiences as a kid that cast alcohol into a terrible light. So much so that I used to not be able to be around it or drunk people, out of both fear and anger. My view on it has eased enough over time, but I must still admit to unease and discomfort around drinks and drunk people. I avoid it if at all possible. Also when it comes to me, I just view anything that changes a person from how they typically are as being inadvisable. That even includes common medication; it should really only be a last resort. I don't know if i'd call alcohol a sin, but drinking it in excess, definitely. I don't take a major issue with it if someone is doing it behind closed doors - Just so long as i'm not around it.
  2. Or it could just be a genetically weak immune system. Did this only start recently? Or perhaps you've got mold or fungus growing in your home somewhere.
  3. My advice for anyone wondering this is to look up various lines of scripture online. They normally quote the line across many different versions, and so looking at these examples, you can gauge which would be a best fit. I started off with an NIV because I had it on-hand, but I bought a KJV and found it much easier to read. Many people are concerned about translations, but it's not so much the words so much as it is the intention behind those words, I like to say.
  4. dr3032

    own car

    Used is the way to go for a cheap car. My current truck was bought for $300, and all it needed was a new spark plug and brake pads. It squeaks and sounds like it's going to collapse in on itself (the underside is completely rusted), but it gets me from point A to B. You can normally find deals like that if the car is a bit of a clunker and needs work - it's like buying a dented can at the supermarket. If you have the know-how to get it fixed, it's pretty much a steal. It's also good to be aware of the blue book value of a car. I don't know if India has a blue book or something similar; it's a research organization that makes and maintains estimated values. Also, if you're going for a fixer-upper, it's good to get a car and company where parts tend to not be a problem. Chevy, in my experience, tends to be good with that... Do they have Chevy in India? Ah, well. The basic idea is the same; do some research and think of it before you buy it. Don't forget to kick the tires.
  5. I would ask her to define what exactly "emotional support" even is. With a rather vague term, people probably imagine different things. I think it best if a man and a woman try to make their marriage work, especially when the cause of issue is not either having an affair. Part of this is having a good, healthy communication. I agree with one of the other posters that she might like it better if you all lived closer to her parents. Maybe point out that you're not a mind reader and that if she wanted emotional support, she should have voiced as much. A man shouldn't have to look at his wife like some kind of Sudoku puzzle. Though on a side note, it might also be good to be prepared if she really is just being irrational and goofy. Not to the point of taking legal action or anything, per say - We really are supposed to try and handle things whilst we're in the way. If she wants to leave and won't hear any of it, then i'd advise praying that she come to her senses, and that her and the children remain safe and well-fed. I can understand concern for your children, but i'm going to quote Matthew 6:26. "Behold the fowls of the air: for they sow not, neither do they reap, nor gather into barns; yet your heavenly father feedeth them. Are ye not much better than they?" Trust in the Lord.
  6. I think the "cool guys" thing is just the search for an understanding friend. Not through text on a screen, but face to face understanding, am I right? You want to know who's a cool guy? Jesus. Pretty gnarly dude, if I do say so myself. This particular sin has been an issue for me as well. In the past, as an unbeliever, I was a sort of deep sea diver when it came to such inappropriate material. Multiple times a day and for a number of years. Let me tell you, that such things change the biological makeup of your mind, making a recovery difficult, almost like an addict. I tried so many times in so many different ways to do it with my own willpower. I am a man, am I not? What kind of dumb animal can't control himself? Well, me, apparently. Trust me, don't fall into the trap of "I can fight it off myself," because I can testify to the fact that it messes you up more. You must pray in the moment. It can be difficult because the mind and the body are fighting you, but prayer is the proper thing to do. I like to also think of the line, "you reap what you sow". You are what you focus on. Put a blocker on your computer to block illicit sites; since these come with passwords and you can find yourself simply bypassing them, you could always try only using the computer in public. Act as if someone is always watching you, because he is. The clothing women wear is also an issue, one I still honestly have a problem with. I try to do a "bounce away" strategy, where you find your eyes going to that part of the women, you bounce your eyes over a different way and don't look back. I forget who said it here in this thread, calling it shame, but yeah, don't dwell on it too much. A bit of guilt is expected, but I know what it's like to focus on it too hard. It's like the mind doesn't shut up going DO IT DO IT and then when you do do it, it sits there for a few hours just going WHY DID YOU DO IT WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU. So tiresome. Just breathe. Take a deep breath and realize that the battle was lost, but not the war. In the words of Grant, "lick 'em tomorrow". Finally, be patient. Wounds take time and effort to be healed. It may seem like you're going nowhere, a little too often, but trust in the Lord. Keep on your feet, you know? *As an addendum, going back to the mind being altered business, it helps if you find something that replaces that "high". Like a hobby. Most people, myself included, like exercise. If and when it rears it's head, go for a walk or take it out on a punching bag. Anything that helps, from painting to bird watching. Just so long as it occupies your mind and helps you feel good without having to resort to such sin.
  7. I have to agree with other posts in that I think people have had an effect in general over time, though being a rather withdrawn and aloof guy, my experiences are rather minimal. They have mostly been "counterpoint" examples; examples of what you don't do. My older brother has shown me to place a value on women, or at least, try to. He's had so many girls in his life, if you asked him for a number, I doubt he would even remember it. Each and every time, they're scared off by his controlling and abusive nature. That, and to show respect for others, as my brother tended to grate on people's nerves with his attitude and manner. Also a lesson in finance, since he would often make out a huge list of wants and desires, and not wanting to strain my family's wallets, i'd insist that I didn't really want anything. My dad had a bad alcohol habit, which is why I don't touch the stuff with a 10 foot pole. I've calmed down about it over time, but I still get really uneasy and upset around people who are drinking and/or drunk. Finance lesson as well, due to gambling problems. I had a friend in school who i'll call J. We met in middle school, and he would drink, and smoke cigs and blunts. I still have a yearbook, and in his picture, he looks to be both drunk and high (flushed cheeks, red eyes). You could always tell, cause he'd seem a bit down when he wasn't at least buzzed. He was initially a bit of a counterpoint, but he changed later. I remember we were walking together to school, and he invited me to come behind the school. I asked him why, and he said that that's where he and some other kids would smoke. "Oh no," I said, "I don't touch that stuff." He looked a bit shocked and grinned, and he said, "That's actually good, don't ever touch it. I wish I hadn't ever picked up the habit." I then asked him why not quit and he said that he had tried to several times already. It wasn't until our freshman year of high school that he revealed he'd successfully quit his habits. No beer or cigarettes, and he was such a happy and friendly guy. He'd shoot fingerguns in the hallways at everyone and laugh like that was somehow the funniest thing ever. It didn't affect me much then, but he kind of showed me that terrible habits can be overcome. I could go on and on, but yeah, it's just been people in general. I've blabbered on enough already.
  8. Can you feel the blood flowing in your hand and throughout your fingers? If you pinch the tip of your finger, you will notice that the fingernail turns a bit white at the top. Does it seem to take a bit longer, once you release the finger, for the pink color to return? Have you noticed any irregularities in heartbeat? Because to me, it sounds like a disruption of blood flow. Either that, or this twitching you're experiencing is a sign of a nervous system disfunction. I'd maybe just keep my eye on it to see if it becomes worse.
  9. My advice? Start off training by driving in the country or outskirts of the city. A big part of driving is getting over one's fear and nervousness, so getting used to the vehicle without having to deal with other drivers (terrible as they are) can really help. That, and driving on the dirt or gravel roads can teach you to be a bit more careful behind the wheel and on the pedal. Be certain to read the driving manual, and when it comes to the written test, be mindful of them putting out trick questions. Be a defensive driver; be as predictable and by-the-book as possible.
  10. I was raised in a Christian home. We had a pastor that my parents really liked. Certain things came to light however, and many of the congregation voted him out of office. My parents were the only ones to stick by him. Because of this, it either was or seemed to be unwelcoming for them at church anymore, so they left. They have not gone to church since, and much of the rest of my youth was rather secular. I eventually bought into atheism as a young teenager. When I started thinking that surely there is an explaination for life beyond a random explosion, I looked elsewhere. I went to the New Age movement for a bit. Then I went to Buddhism. I then finally felt the pull to pick up the Bible. I was the typical atheist, too. I'd mock people for their beliefs. Go online and start arguments. I've said and done many things in the past that I regret. Far too many things. However, it must be of note that this was brought about not by someone speaking to me. It's not that I disagree, of course; hate the sin, not the sinner. I try to view everyone as a potential brother or sister. I also agree with other posts though that this should not be seen as a means of permissiveness. Sin is not okay and it never will be. The way I was in the past? It was incorrect.
  11. If it's the church in general, I like to put a divide between man and God. Just because someone claiming to be a Christian wronged you doesn't mean that God wronged you. There's men, and then there's God. His thoughts aren't our thoughts, nor his ways our ways. If it's just the specific congregation, then I agree with the other posters. Forgiveness I agree with, but having toxic and inconsiderate people around you just tends to drag you down.
  12. Um... "Super hot cousin"? I apologize for pointing it out, but most relatives i'd say something like "pretty" or "charming". Super hot cousin is kind of... Yeesh. I would definitely advise prayer. When I was trying to move away from being an atheist, I looked elsewhere before being pulled towards the Bible - That includes the New Age nonsense. It is confusion. People either convincing themselves of something or other, or the deceiver lulling them into such trickery. As it is with most things, people are very unwilling to change, nor question themselves. I suppose any kind of approach you might try to make would be based on their beliefs. That would probably involve... A bit too much research and focus on such things than i'd really advise, for anyone. Prayer and letting yourself be shown as an example is really the best option.
  13. In school, you don't have to worry. Were you paying attention when that other guy was up there talking? I feel like when people realize that other people are kind of taken up in their own little worlds, the prospect of messing up and being judged for it just looks silly. Who cares what they think, anyway? Most people are idiots. As I like to say, if you don't want to fall, then don't look down. You just have to make sure that you've got your presentation in order. I should hope, at the very least, that this isn't a group project. I remember having to do a group presentation in school, and when the teacher called on my group, I was the only one who went to the front of the class. My group was laughing at me and they were like, "yeah, we didn't really do any of the work" so the teacher just told me to give my portion of the project. I had stage fright too, so I stammered and stuttered on about drunk driving while feeling embarrassed. I only realized years later that the only ones who needed to be embarrassed were my group members.
  14. I have seas but no water. A coast with no sand. Towns without people. Mountains without land. What am I? A: Map. I am rarely touched, but often held. If you're smart, you will use me well. A: Tongue I can be the sun. I can be the sand. I can be a bird. What am I? A. Clock
  15. Your enemy is moving to attack you. What do you need? A formidable shield. What is a shield? Faith. Your enemy flanks you, and attempts to strike you from the side. What do you need? A suit of armor. If you're wearing full plate, then the blow not blocked by your shield will either be deflected or will have minimal effect. You parry your enemy, thus leaving him open. What do you need? A blade. What is a blade? The word of God. For no enemy stands before it. There is a reason why Paul writes of the armor of God. I would compare perserverance more with a warrior on the battlefield.
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