Havelock

By doing the little things that hopefully make God happy to look at me. Small everyday good deeds - perhaps listening to someone who is in need of a listener, giving spare change to a person in need, helping a friend, reaching out to someone I know has been lonely etc. - I think this is a really good and effective way of getting closer to Jesus by getting closer to His people. It's good to have a goal of doing something for someone at least once every day, however small the thing. Of course it's not going to be doable every day, but it's a good concept to keep in mind. The other way I try worship God is to remind myself of His presence in common everyday moments. When I'm dressing up, queueing somewhere, driving etc. - just dedicate one thought to acknowledge that He's there with you and share the moment with Him - it's quite literally one hundredth of a second that needs to be dedicated to this but it makes a world of difference. And of course, by reading a bit of scripture every day before bed and meditating on what I read for a while - trying to understand it from different angles, maybe reading up on cultural/historical context of what I read or other peoples opinions and interpretations - just do something to ensure it's not mindless reading. And then by prayer, of course. These are things I consciously pay attention to every day. A checklist of sorts if you will. There are moments of spontaneous need/want to worship occasionally, especially during harder times, but I don't count that as a systematic worship.

I agree it is important to have friends that are godly and a rock to lean on and a good example to you in Christ. However, there might be a slight but - and that is that having a variety of friends, both atheists and agnostic or perhaps of a different religious persuasion can be beneficial as long as you have the strength of the belief to hold on to what you have. A respectful debate with an atheist can set you thinking about godly things in different angles. Ones that you wouldn't have discovered on your own. For example a useful technique for me when I'm reading the Bible is trying to imagine I'm explaining what I read to one of my atheist friends or perhaps a child who has never heard of God - not necessarily persuading, just explaining - and it often leads me to a thought process that ends in a sudden understanding of what I read from an angle that was previously hidden to me. Conversations with my atheist friends and observations of their lives - with the help of Holy Spirit - have lead me to conclusions and ideas I wouldn't be able to think up on my own. Of course it's very important to have a good Christian base to refer to and friends who are able to relate to everyday struggles and joys of a Christian as well :)

Hello, yes, I have not had a very long life so far but I have gone through many phases - some that I'm less than proud of. And I can tell you one thing, even during the time when I was sure that there was no God at all, when I didn't hesitate to insult Him or his Christians and even if someone somehow managed to make me believe that He was real I would have had chosen the dark side. And I can tell you one thing that I can say today with absolute certainty: Even during those times He was keeping a protective hand over me, even during those times He loved me and wept for what I was doing to Him - because even if I wasn't capable of acknowledging it at the time- I was His just like you are His no matter what. Which is not to say no effort should be put into the relationship from your side. However posting here indicates that you have the will to come back. So just honestly ask Him to forgive you, ask Him to come to you as you come to Him and He will. I know because He came to me. Good luck my friend, it's not an easy way because true belief is a gift - but God is far more generous than we deserve. I have just a couple ideas for you to keep in mind that might help you go forward on your way with Jesus. 1. It's all about your relationship with God, not your relationship with fellow Christians. Those are two very different things. 2. If you make one step towards God, he'll make one hundred towards you. 2. God loves you because He is love. And he won't forget or leave you just because you forgot or left him.