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Well, here in Canada, where I live, the federal Parliament -- about two years ago -- passed a law that supposedly does just that; the law allows gay marriges but is supposed to allow churches and religious organizations that don't believe in gay marriage (Christian and non-Christian alike) to opt out of performing gay marriages. But the Christian community in my country is concerned that the law does not go far enough in protecting churches, denominations, ministers, and other religious leaders who do not want to perform gay marriage.
I will try not to make this posting too lengthy, but here is one of the concerns:
United Church of Canada is officially in favour of gay marriage, even though there are many Bible-believing ministers within the denomination who are against it. Nothing in the current law protects a minister -- in a denomination such as United Chruch of Canada -- from being defrocked by his or her denomination for refusing to perform a gay marriage. In all fairness, no minister in United Church has been defrocked for that kind of thing so far, but the potential is there ...
Along the same lines, there is the concern -- in my opinion, the very legitimate concern, that allowing gay marriages coulld be a slippery slope; it could be the thin edge of the wedge. If we allow a law that legalizes gay marriages -- but doesn't force any minister or other religious leader to perform gay marriage ceremonies -- today, then the gay community may very well be lobbying for a law that will force them to perform gay marriages tomorrow!
I agree with you there. But we have to remember that my country -- like yours -- is a democracy, not a theocracy! And in a democracy, it is not practical to try to make all kinds of non-Christian weddings illegal. It is not practical in a democratic society to outlaw Jewish weddings, for example, let alone Islamic, Hindu, Buddhist, Sikh, etc. weddings, as well as totally non-religious ones. However, it is practical to outlaw gay marriages, because Bible-believing Chistians are not the only ones who are opposed to gay marriages. Sikhs, "Koran-believing" Moslems, Orthodox Jews, Hindus, Buddhists, and most other major religions are opposed to gay marriages as well. In fact, even a lot of non-relgious people who simply understand the importance of preserving the family as an institution are opposed to gay marriages.
So the bottom line is, the reason that the churches are focussing on fighting against gay marriages -- but not against non-Christian marriages in general, is because we have to make the distinction between what is and isn't practical in a democracy!
Hope that helps answer your questions, Secondeve!
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MRHarvey