~esther~

Thanks, I guess I pretty much already knew the answer. I just cannot see how I am not going to end up with a stroke or heart attack due to the stress I am under. Guess it's my path then..

For years now I've been going through ups and downs in my marriage (married 28 years), but the downs have been significant. I'm not in a physically abusive relationship, and all is great when it's good, but when it's bad, then it's really bad. My husband is a narcissist and compulsive liar, so things can be amazing at times, and things can be awful at times. I've been patient, loving, kind and always trying to keep the peace, but it's just suffocating. We love each other dearly, but it sometimes feels like I'm married to the devil himself (that's no exaggeration!). As long as things are good and running smoothly, then it's fine, but the littlest things can trigger him and then he turns into this monster. My health is suffering as a result of tremendous stress that I am under all the time. I'm constantly under pressure from him, and have to give account of all my actions, to the point where I'm not even allowed to visit our son at his home, without my husband knowing about it. He's always checking when I'm on my phone and want to know who I'm talking to, who I'm messaging, what I'm doing on my phone. He controls our finances and I earn a reasonably good salary, but he controls all the money. I'm very privileged to be working from home mostly, but when I need to be in the office, then he starts saying things like, I just want to go hang out with the men in the office, or if I talk to my boss too much, then he gets ideas in his head. He also blames our grown-up children for our marriage troubles and accuses me of keeping things from him if I don't tell him everything. He wants to know absolutely everything all the time, even when I leave a room to go get a drink in the kitchen, he would ask where I'm going, what I'm doing. He knows where I am all the time due to an app on our phones that shows location, and has a tracker on my car, which is for insurance purposes, but he uses it for controlling me. We gym together, but I must use the same equipment he uses, otherwise he gets angry and upset that I don't want to do things with him. If he goes to bed at night and I want to watch a bit more television, then he wants to know where I was (despite knowing I watched television) and gets upset if I don't go to bed the same time he does. He controls everything. I am suffocating and exhausted. He hates my beliefs (me being Christian), and gets upset if I go to church consecutive Sundays. I joined a women's bible study at church that takes place on Tuesday mornings, but he didn't like it and was upset and suspicious of me going, so I'm not doing it any longer. Don't get me wrong, I also have many things that I do wrong that contribute to our fractured relationship, but for once I've started standing up for myself, standing up to him and not allowing him to emotionally drain me like this. I've had enough and I am tired. My question is, would it be wrong if I decide to separate from him? I'm not interested in moving on, or finding someone else. I just want to get out of this emotionally abusive mess that I am in. I know divorce is a sin, but what if I want to separate from him? I have no intentions with anyone else at all. I just want peace! I just want to be able to breathe for once in my life. I just want to know what it feels like to smile and be happy and not stressed. I'm so so incredibly exhausted.... There is so much more to all of this than what I was able to type. It's a huge mess. Anyone who knows narcissistic behaviors, will have an idea what this man is doing to me.

Sorry I missed you in chat. Feel free to drop in and say hi. You will get heaps of support there.

Hahaha I was wondering how far this ridiculous news would travel

Please can someone help me understand in layman's terms what this 5777 and the Jewish calendar and the year 2017 is all about? I see a lot of posts about it on facebook and I have googled it, but don't know which websites are actually giving me the full accurate story. It all seems like a load of nonsense to me as everything I have seen so far are from self proclaimed prophets and pentacostal pastors. Please can someone explain so I can in turn give concise answers to my fb friends as to why it's something to agree with, or not. Here are some links I found: http://www.elijahlist.com/words/display_word.html?ID=16678 https://biblicalsignsintheheadlines.com/2016/09/09/5777-are-you-rapture-ready/ and there are plenty more. Thanks esther

Thanks all. Separation or divorce is not and never will be an option. We got married when both were unsaved. I am saved. He is not. It's extremely hard some days and other days I can cope. I also knowthat it's worse than usual because of my lack of relationship with God - entirely my own doing. I know God won't let go, but I am in a very bad place emotionally and spiritually at the moment and feel overwhelmed. Thanks for the support and advice and prayers.

I know that I shouldn't say or even think this, but it sometimes feel like I am married to a pawn in the devil's hand (probably am). It has been getting worse and worse for months or few years now, but every time something happens it's like a new low for my husband. Narcissistic bully control freak compulsive liar...doesn't even begin to describe him. My spiritual life is almost non existent as I am tired of hoping praying crying fearing (not physical abuse but the terrible influence he has on those under his mighty destructive hand is enough to break anyone emotionally!). 21 years of marriage and I won't give up, but I have no hope. I am struggling with severe depression as a result but are not on medication. How hard must life knock a person before God intervenes??? I know we are not promised an easy life, but this is making me physically sick. Not even sure why I am writing this. Maybe to rant. Maybe to ask for prayer. I don't know. esther

What does Psalm 19:4 mean when it says that God has pitched a tent for the sun? 4 "Yet their voice goes out into all the earth, their words to the ends of the world. In the heavens God has pitched a tent for the sun." Is there a specific significance or maybe a Hebrew meaning for this? I'd love to understand what is meant by a tent being pitched for the sun. I have read some commentaries on this, but wonder if anyone knows if there is a deeper meaning behind it?

Hi All I couldn't find any real answers online, or maybe I just didn't search by using the correct words. Do Jehovah's Witnesses consider it to be taking the Lord's Name in vain when specifically using the expression "OMG"? (Sorry I cannot type it out as it just feels wrong and even typing the acronym makes me cringe, but I don't know how else to specify that I'm searching answers on). Reason for my question is that we have 4 JW's at our work, but one of them always expresses herself by saying those words, and if it is a no-no for them, then I would like to challenge her on it - i.e. if they believe so-and-so, then why is she taking the Lord's Name in vain. However, all I could find online suggests that they don't really see it as taking the Lord's Name in vain. Can anyone else shed some light on this? Thanks

Hi all What's your thoughts on christians taking part in the Color Run? Is it something to avoid or is it harmless fun? https://prepareforthelamb.wordpress.com/2014/03/20/christian-view-of-the-color-run-holi-festival-putting-the-brakes-on-pagan-christianity/

I'm not quite sure I agree with that statement simplejeff - do you have biblical reference to say that if someone does something wrong they will receive curse, disease, punishment, etc? I don't agree with your answer, it simply does not line up with a forgiving God. If a Christian does something wrong there is forgiveness. My question is, whether the statement "opening spiritual doors in our lives" are even biblical. E.g. demonic doors.

If someone chooses not to do something because they don't want to open spiritual doors into their lives, is that biblical? I guess the question that I am asking is if the phrase "opening spiritual doors into our lives" are biblical. Example - someone doesn't take part in Halloween celebrations because they don't want to open spiritual doors into their lives. It almost sounds like a phrase that the word-faith-movement would use, but I could be mistaken and would really like to know if this statement is even biblical. Focus on my question please, this is not a Halloween related question, it's just an example I am using so please turn it into a Halloween thread! esther

Thanks Chloe! So if I understand this correctly: First part: the Israelites were under the oppression of the Midianites for 7 years. The bull was 7 years old. The age of the bull is symbolising the end of a 7 year of tyranny from the Midianites (kill/sacrifice the bull = end of the 7 year oppression) Second part: Observation 1: The "second bull" - the first bull was most likely being fattened for sacrificing to Baal, which would mean it was "unclean" to sacrifice to the Lord, therefore the second bull was fit to be sacrificed. Observation 2: The first bull was sacrificed by Gideon for himself, and the second for the sins of the people - he needed to be clean first before he could bring sacrifices for the people. Observation 3: The second bull = symbolic of the second Adam, which is Jesus Thoughts?

Judges 6:25 That same night the Lord said to him, “Take the second bull from your father’s herd, the one seven years old. Tear down your father’s altar to Baal and cut down the Asherah pole beside it. Why does the bible specifically say the "second bull" and "seven years old"? Is there any significance to the second bull and to the age that the bull should be?

Thanks all. It's been really helpful. Interesting subject.

Oops sorry for typos. Using Using mobile phone :S

Hope I'm posting this in the right place. I've been hearing a lot about the blood moons lately and apparently another one is due. Just read some interesting comments on something someone posted about blood moons on Facebook and now I'm confused. Is it even legit? I kkow the bible speaks about the moo turning to blood with the Lord's day but have have never heard of the four blood moons and how it ties in with Israel etc. Is this another false false teaching/hype or is it worth the read and is there truth in it? Esther

I initially thought to go with prophecies 'in general' but that would take ages. I just want to give my son a simple, easy to understand answer (which you cannot really do because the Bible is so vast and amazing you cannot sum anything up in a few sentences). Maybe Revelation would be a good one to provide answers. I did get a few websites from chat admin, so I'll be looking at those as well. The tricky thing is explaining these things to an unsaved 17-year old who doesn't want me to fiddle and annoy him with biblical stuff...

(Mods please move to the correct forum if this is not where it belongs) My son came to me earlier this week and said that 'many people say' that almost all of the prophecies in the bible SPECIFICALLY REVELATION have happened. So he asked me if I knew if it's true and what prophecies have come to pass. My biblical knowledge is not such that I was able to answer this. So any chance someone can shed some light on this for me? His questions was related to all these crazy end-time prophecies and then a light discussion where someone at work said that some of the prophecies have come to pass. Keep in mind he is 17 and unsaved, so has limited biblical knowledge apart from what he hears coming out of my mouth.

Oh and in answer to Fez and Candice's replies... DREAM ON!! The All Blacks are going to walk so hard over you you're going to forget there were ever other colours beside BLACK! Ha! (still praying for NZ tho)

I agree with you completely WIP. I have been praying so long asking the Lord to please bring fellow Christians my way at work - I work for a very large organisation - and everyday I hear the scoffing, mocking, blaspheming and I wonder how long will God be patient. It's not just at work, it's everywhere. Christians in this country are only a tiny handful. How long Lord, how long....

NZ is really going through a very rough time and the tornadoes that we have had, were big ones, not like the 'usual' ones. The earthquakes are increasing and have started to rock other parts of the south island as well. As to your question andy, I also wonder if it's God speaking. This country has turned its back on the Lord and people are living recklessly and give no thought to God. I am generalizing yes, but have not been proven wrong, yet. However, as long as there is God, there is hope and the mission field in NZ is vast and the labourers are few. From other side of the ditch.

Okay I've been wondering about this for some time... Is there a difference between: SIN, TRANSGRESSIONS, INIQUITIES, TRESPASSES? The bible refers to them all, but why not just 'SIN'? Is there a difference? There are too many examples to post. I searched the NKJV and found: SIN/s appear 195 times TRANSGRESSION/s appear 92 times INIQUITY appears 229 times TRESPASSES appears 12 times I realise you have to look at context and the overall picture of what is being said, but in many (I haven't read all the references yet LOL) of the references above it has to do with SIN. So why does it not specifically say SIN? Just wondering.....

IMO: If it was physical healing then why are there still sick christians? Lack of faith? If so, then we all fall short and if the healing was physical then what did Jesus need the stripes for, since a physical sick person can still go to heaven, but a spiritual sick person (unsaved) not - it doesn't add up. The whole idea of physical healing doesn't make sense to me - on the other hand, spiritual healing does, as this is why He actually died for us. God the Father did not turn His face from His son because He saw physical sickness... He did so because He saw Sin (Christ). Like on reply said, He is under no obligation to physically heal the sick (saved or unsaved), but as for spiritual healing, He has to as this is what His Son died for on the cross. Back to the stripes. 2Joyful's answer made the most sense to me - it was to "draw blood" and the Blood of Christ is what washes away/covers our sin. That was actually my whole question - what was the meaning of the stripes/lashes relating to the whole crucifixion. So, am I on the right track if I interpret that it was: a) Innocent blood that was flowing due to the lashes/stripes? b) Without the lashes/stripes there would not have been blood on the cross? (Apart from the spear in Christ's side) Sigh, I feel so lost and ignorant