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Gift of Grace

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  1. We love God and His word is truth. Psalm 139:14 states "I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well" We all have things that we need to work on to become more Christlike. But God does not make us flawed and He wants us to be what He made us to be. Whenever you have these doubts go to the word of God. It will sustain you.
  2. Well I think you all will be glad to know that I went back to bible study last night. I went with the idea that I would not answer any questions but I would listen and learn. Well that did not happen either. I knew the answer to the first question and since no one else seemed to I spoke up. I answered the another question as well. I will continue to go to bible study. I might say something foolish again but I know that is ok. It might be for my own growth or someone elses. It's all in Jesus' plan.
  3. hi Gift (please remember that is what you are: a precious Gift to the Father from Jesus!) "foolish" is a rather subjective word, don't you think? it may have seemed foolish to them (and you), but i don't think it was. did anyone in your group know you had lived in 7 different western states? i'm guessing not, so it was something nobody else there knew. did the question say a "secret" thing? no. so why would you think it had to be? i wouldn't have. and "gently ridiculed" is rather like an oxymoron, methinks. ridicule and gentlness come from opposite ends of the spectrum! the many times i've been in a situation like this, i try to imagine Jesus sitting there, and i think of how He would have responded. it tends to help me. so if i may... i'd like to visualize for you what might have happened had He physically been sitting in your group. when you answer the question, Jesus says something like, "wow! you've lived in a lot of places. you've probably seen some wonderful things." then He asks some questions about it and draws from you the real question He wants answered. like, "is there anything that has happened that you longed to tell someone, but never felt safe enough to do so?" we don't share deep things, Gift of Grace, until we feel safe. so maybe, instead of a "foolish" answer, you gave a very wise one! i agree that talking to your Bible study leader would be a good start. but please don't run away! i'm thinking that that doesn't solve too many of our problems. running, or quitting, is sometimes the easy way out short term, but it's not worth it in the long run. *tiny pun* i like your heart and your goals! char Thanks Char, I know that Jesus was there but it would have been great for Him to be sitting in that room. I will try to think what he would say the next time I am in a similar situation.
  4. Amen Sister!! Although I totally understand what you are saying and believe that in part it is true (no one told me I was foolish.) What I was told was that I answered the question incorrectly. The exact words were "That is not what they are asking for. It has to be something that is a secret, something that nobody knows." So my answer in the light of this statement does in fact look foolish.
  5. Thank you all so much for your kind words. I feel so much better. Being reminded of the love of the Lord and that the Holy Spirit dwells in me has given me strength. I will continue to build my faith on the Word of the Lord. When I say something foolish, and I am sure I will, I will remember that this is the way the Lord has made me and that I am learning and to have patience with myself. Thanks again.
  6. So last night I went to bible study. We have been doing a study on what would you change in your life if you only had 30 days to live. The first question that was asked was: " Share with the group one interesting fact about you that nobody else knows." I thought the question was more geared to getting to know each other better. So I say " I have lived in 7 different western states." Well apparently the question was more geared towards a secret that we need to confess. Several people confessed things and we prayed for them. Well I was embarassed and feel like a fool. Several times I have been in bible study and my answers to the questions have been gently ridiculed. I do not think that anyone takes me seriously. Like I could never amount to anything in my Christian walk. I know that the Lord loves me and maybe he is chastising me as well. I feel like I should stop going to bible study and stay home and go over the studies that I have all ready gone to so I can be stronger in my walk. I really just want to be a loving example of Christ to the world. I was thinking of using the time that I would normally be in bible study to do a friendly visitor program at a nursing home instead. I am a little bit sad and confused today. I don't know why I often come out looking like a fool.
  7. Hi all and thank you for all you advice. I see now that I was over reacting. I still do not know what he was trying to say. It was in a negative connotation but he could have been taking about abortion for all I know. Anyway I will talk to him and see what he was talking about. Thanks again.
  8. First of all I want to give some history. I have been married for 27 years. When my husband and I were first married we wanted children but had a hard time conceiving. We went to a fetility specialist for months but got no conclusive answers. We decided at that time that we would not let this rule our lives. We have seen others that have had their lives ruined and been so unhappy because they could not have children. Merifully the Lord has never given me any mental anguish over not having children. Today I went to church. I have been going to this church for several years. I went to the first service and there was only about 30 people there. I knew that mother's would be exhonorated and that was ok for me. It is mother's day after all. It was a good sermon on love. At the end of the sermon the pastor was talking about how God loves us the way we are. Then he said how proud he was of mother's. He listed the difficulties they face in this day and age, including the fact that you can choose not to have children. I was very hurt by his words. I did choose to not continue to try to have children, we did choose not to adopt. But he was not there. He did not know how it felt for me or what was going on in my life at that time. I do not regret those decisions. He knows I am childless and I feel he said those things to hurt me. I am wondering if I am welcome at this church. Am I being overly sensitive? Even if he was not being rude I think what he said was not be sensitive to others. He does not know what goes into those decisions and he is judging others. If God accepts me as I am shouldn't my church?
  9. So I have a new question. How do you go through the refiners fire gracefully and not rebelliously? I feel the lick of that first flame and I get so angry. I would love to see it for what it is.
  10. I can not thank you all enough. You have all helped me tremendously. If God is doing a work in me then Hallelujah! No matter how uncomfortable. Sometimes you just have to be reminded of the truth. Thank you, Thank you, Thank you. P.S. I have taken a stand on the calling people stupid thing. They still do it.
  11. Thank you so much for answering my post. Yes God was telling me to stay. Once in Church the pastor said something to the effect "If you are having a difficult time at your work don't leave you are needed there" and two different times at a bible study I got the same message. All of these were after I had prayed about it. No onw knew that I was having trouble at work and these messages were almost out of context with what was being taught. It was a jerk your head up kind of moment when you wonder if you really just heard that. I send handmade cards to elderly shut-ins and nursing home residents. That is my card ministry. I have some volunteers that give me cards but could always use more. It is wonderful what joy a simple card can give to someone who is isolated. I thought it would be great to get together with the people at my church and make cards. I first went to the Art's Ministry pastor. He did not feel this was art. So he sent me to the Womens Ministry. Also rejected. I have talked to my husband. He is a wonderful person but does not always get it. Anyway thanks again
  12. First of all I want to say that the Lord has blessed me. Not only has he died to save me from my sins and the death that goes with those sins, but He has blessed me financially, and health wise. Not in any big way but I am at peace and secure. My hurting comes from the fact that He always puts me in situations that I am rejected and that hurts. First of all I can not have children. The Lord has been merciful and never let this hurt me mentally. But I get so tired of always having it brought up and explaining and trying to make others feel comfortable about it. If people would just let it be I'd be ok. Then there is my job. People here are mean and judgemental. If you make a mistake here you are called stupid and that is just the beginning. I get so tired of hearing rude things. At first I thought that the Lord was helping me to learn to love difficult people but I get tired of being crushed. I have talked to the Lord about leaving my job. Three times I have had the message that he wanted me to stay here. I felt the Lord wanted me to talk to my church about my card ministry, which I did. They rejected the idea. At first I thought that I did not explain it very well so I tried again. I was rejected again. Even a simple idea in my marriage, like let's do this or that...REJECTED. I know that God does not reject me. But why does he want me to suffer this here? I don't get how this is love.
  13. Thanks Trusting Jesus, you are right and I will work on praying out loud. I know how important it is and I really do want to be able to do that for others.
  14. I love the ministries that I am involved in. I work sorting clothes for the Clothing the Homeless Ministry and I am in charge of the Card Ministry. I will not give them up and they work out well with my schedule. Basically I am allowed to work when ever I can. The Prayer Team is alot of work and time and I have already told them I will not be able to be on the team. Although I feel a little guilty I know that if I am being realistic I do not have time to do it. I really appreciate the comments you have all given me. It really helps you to see other ideas that you might not have thought about.
  15. I can think of a good reason why you should not do this... Do you have time? Will it take you away from "minding for the store" [meaning taking care of home and family first]? I know that you said I should take my time and think and pray about this but when you asked this question you could have knocked me over with a feather. I have just be praying about this very thing a few days ago. I talk to the Lord all the time. I was asking him to help me with my time so that I could find the time to do all the things I need to do at home so I am not stressed, angry and crazy. And then I go and contimplate adding another thing to my day. I already work full time. Monday through friday 8-5, I have my own small ministry that makes, collects and sends handmade cards to elderly shut-ins and nursing home residents, I help with the clothing the homeless ministry at our church, I just finished a women's bible study which met once a week, YIKES. It's just that I see so much need and I want to help. And I wonder why these things are brought to my attention if God does not want me to do them? Anyway, I know I need to get my priorities in order. 1. God 2. Family 3. Church. Right?
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