Search the Community
Showing results for tags 'Bad neighbors'.
-
Hello, I am posting in regards to issues I have with a lonely and overly friendly, elderly female neighbor who lives across the street from me. My family and I lost our home and relocated in September 2013, and are still fairly new to the community in which we reside, and no one really made us feel welcome except her. In fact, the neighbor who lives beside us has been unreasonable with us and others, in many ways. She began by waving and speaking to us in a friendly manner. We did the same. Then, my mother advised me to give her a token of our appreciation during Christmas of 2014. She insisted on inviting me into her home and gave me a tour of each room, family photos and other personal belongings. I did not think this was necessary or appropriate, since we do not know each other that well. But, she is seemingly very lonesome. She explained how her nephew is the only family member she has in town, while the majority of her immediate family resides elsewhere. We ended up exchanging phone numbers, and since she no longer drives, I told her to call me if she needed me for anything. I also told her she would be welcome at my home. She told me the same thing. She began making it her duty to walk over to my home unannounced and uninvited, almost every other weekend. Mostly on Sunday afternoons after church. Each time, she claimed that she was just checking on me and my family to make sure we were okay. Although we exchanged phone numbers, she never opted to call first. I may be wrong, but I feel as if she had an agenda. Once, I invited her into our home because I felt obligated to do so. I have regretted this ever since. She became too friendly and clingy for my comfort level. Each time I stepped outside my door to sweep or do anything related to outdoor work, she would immediately come to her front door or come stand on her front porch and yell, "Hello, how are you doing"? It's almost like she was staring outside her window to see when I come outside. I felt stalked. She seemed to develop a disturbingly inappropriate fixation on me, more than anyone else in my family, or in the neighborhood. I tried waving to her and speaking as friendly as possible, then turning around to continue my work, letting her know I am busy. Then, she would stand and stare at me for a while, then say something else. Soon, she would walk over and stand at the front of my house or driveway, and keep talking to me anyway. It's like she was demanding that I stop what I was doing so I could accommodate her. She did this to me twice, last month. The first time, I waved and spoke friendly to her from a distance, but I was very short with her. That obviously was not good enough for her. She came and stood at the foot of my driveway, and I told her to have a nice day. She had no choice except to walk away feeling disappointed. The second time, I became so annoyed with her, that I gave her the cold shoulder because she seemingly did not want to take the hint that I was not in the mood to talk to her. Especially when she could clearly see I was busy. Not just sweeping. I never said anything disrespectful to her, but my ways and actions spoke volumes about how annoyed and harassed I felt by her. She walked away again, more disappointed than before. I did not want to hurt her feelings or be disrespectful due to her age. However, she made me very uncomfortable, and had become quite a nuisance. I allowed my anger to control me because I was at my wits end with this lady. Although she goes out of her way to say " Hello" to everyone she sees outdoors, I almost feel as if she was fixated on me personally. I did not appreciate this. I am a 37 year old single and heterosexual woman who has a family and other responsibilities. She is a widow in her mid 70's, retired and lives alone. She is not my equal and we have nothing in common. Why couldn't she understand that? Since that encounter, I can tell that her feelings are hurt. She has kept her distance from me and my family and tries not to come outside when I am present. At times, my mother has spotted her sitting on her porch, walking to her mailbox, staring directly at our house. Still she never comes over, or says anything to me when I am outdoors. For that, I am grateful to God, because now I can work outside in peace. Recently, she gave my brother the cold shoulder when he tried to greet her after he came home. Now, it seems as if she is taking her resentment out on him, to get back at me. He has done nothing to her. Since she is known as the friendliest person on our street, she has most likely tried to turn everyone against us. Since they were never friendly to begin with, they surely are not now that this has occurred. I have prayed to The Lord Jesus Christ regarding this incident and have asked him to forgive me for not handling things in a more gentle and Christain-like manner. He has also given me discernment in realizing that this woman obviously has a problem that she is unaware of, and needs prayer. How can a person whom goes to church almost every Sunday and calls themself a Christian, behave in this manner, and think it's okay? A woman her age should see the error of her ways and take responsibility for her actions and try to correct it. Loneliness is not an excuse. Am I right or wrong? (I will only accept and respond to those who present Biblical/Godly advice, not Worldly advice. Going forward, I am only trying to please my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ and become a better person. Not worse. Thank you and God Bless All.)