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Found 6 results

  1. In view of the times in which we live I am finding that staying where I need to be in Christ is a bit of a struggle for me, and I am wondering if I am alone in this? Now days I find it more of a struggle to pray as I should. I read my Bible and wish I were getting more out of it than I am. I am in a Bible study group and am interested in it and have loved that we have been viewing video of the Feast's of the Lord. I have never really gotten into this subject much before so I get a little absorbed in it. I love learning something new about our Lord on a regular basis, which keeps me from getting bored and feeling as if I am not progressing. I am not bored with our Lord, however. I look forward to being with Him and hope it is soon.
  2. Hi, I’m here again lol. Thanks for all of you who have helped me through my crisis a couple weeks ago. QUESTION: How do I deal with my family who discriminates against me because i am darker. Now, I am vulnerable with this topic. I don’t know how racially diverse worthy is, (doesn’t matter) but I don’t know if any of you would understand what I am saying or relate. I am grateful for any advice. Like some of you know, my family is not supportive of my mental health. I can not tell them my issues. So I come here. I am very grateful for all of you, truly! Anyway, I’m a black young women (17). For all of you who don’t know what colorism is. It is “prejudice or discrimination against individuals with a dark skin tone, typically among people of the same ethnic or racial group”. Colorism is a huge problem in the black community. In my experience, among some people I know and in society, dark skin is looked down upon. The thing is, colorism is a topic that makes people uncomfortable. I think because no one wants to admit that it exist. And because they may be colorist aswell. So here’s my problem, my immediate family is very colorist. This started with my mother who is of darker skin. Now, both my parents are black but my father is lighter skin. His complexion is more like George Lopez, while my moms is like Naomi Campbell. I have 5 sibling. My older brother and myself take after our moms complexion and my younger sister and younger 2 brothers take after my dads. Well you would think that my mother would not have a problem with having darker kids but she does. She projects her self hatred onto me. She has been verbally (& physically) abusive to me since I was 8. Whenever she wants to insult me, she targets my skintone, which is the same as hers, and also my hair and weight. She has uplifted my siblings as better and more beautiful than me because of their lighter skin. She makes comments indirectly about their hair and skin as being better than mine. It hurts. It hurts because she has brainwashed this to them, making them believe that they are better than darker people like myself. It hurts because i am singled out and this has been going since I was a young child . My mom is a narcissist so she really won’t accept blame. We have a looooonnngg history of just craziness. We have been doing better, but we never got along. I was always to blame. But that’s besides the point really. I have never struggled with accepting my skin; (blessing), but my low self esteem was because of my weight and I just think I am ugly. I recently realized that what is going on in my family is NOT okay! I have talked to my parents about this and how satan wants to divide our people. And colorism is a trick he uses. While they accept what I’m saying, they continue to make these comments. I am gaslighted all the time about being over sensitive when I get upset. For example, the reason I am writing this is because 10 minutes ago we were having family time and I told my dad that his comment about my brothers girlfriend was disrespectful and colorist. Of course he denied it. But then my sister jumped in and began to scold me. BTW, she is VERY vain and thinks that she is better because she is lighter. She doesn’t understand the struggles dark skin women face. My sister thinks she is prettier than me because of her skin. And for the comments people make about her being prettier than me because she is lighter. I’m sorry that this is so long. It is just that I’m very sad rn and feel less than. As much as I try to stay strong, their comments get to me and sometimes I question myself. I have always took pride in my skin but other areas I struggle (body). I hate when people are sad. Especially when other little darker girls hate their skin because of colorism and society. For example, my younger cousin who is 4 believes she would be prettier if she had light skin. It happens in the black community a lot. The media influence has a lot to do with it aswell as the whole slavery stuff. But I want to be an activist and a lawyer one day. And tackle problems like this. I know colorism is also a problem in India and south Asian counties. Anyway, if you made it this far God bless you lol ?! Any advice is needed. Please pray that I can strive forward, I just feel drained and forgotten . I’m trying to do better and listen to god... but I admit I am struggling. Thank you, love all of you !?
  3. Hi. I have not been on here in a while. But I hope all of you are well. My reason for posting this is, I hope you will pray for my family. When i go, I don’t want them to feel much pain for me, but I just don’t believe I could get better through people praying for me. So I already have a plan. I just ask for you guys to pray for them. There are many people on here who have prayed for me so thank you. Maybe this is an outcry for something idk, but I decided that it will not get better for me. My social anxiety has DESTROYED my life. My faith is non existent. I am just a lonely HS senior whose tried God and the church. But I don’t want to go into detail about my life, there’s too much. There are probably people out there who are much worse, but they are stronger than me. Farewell.
  4. if u are heaving trouble with sin, dismiss it as nonsense, because its easier to dismiss nonsense then a supernatural force of evil
  5. Hi, everyone! My name is Michelle, and I am 26 years old. I am married to a wonderful man, and I have 2 overweight cats haha. I don't really know what else to say about myself, haha, but I'd be glad to answer any questions. Now to get started: I am new to this site and so eager to be here to have fellowship with you all! I am having a rough time right now. Something I am ashamed of as it’s a terrible trial for me. I keep saying it’s a trail. I am fairly new in Christ. I have been a believer since I was little, but didn’t truly come to Christ until this year. I was a sinful believer, as sad as that sounds. I really only prayed to God when I needed something or was super scared. I had a strong urge inside myself to start going to church and to thank God for all my blessings – you know before something bad happened (which I know is not how God works haha, but that was my mind last year). I did not thank God as I was putting it off and putting it off, although it was a simple prayer away. I also never started going to church. My life was just getting more and more sinful as I gave into some temptations. That’s when it hit – on the night of March 15, I fell into a great despair and depression. I became very clinging to my husband, poor him. I didn’t know what could help, not even my husband could help me, and I knew in my spirit I had to turn to God. I started attending church, praying, and spending at least an hour a day with God in devotion. I was still very selfish in all this as I was only focused on getting better and not truly on my relationship with God. It eventually grew that wanting a relationship and I finally felt my time was not wasted. Soon, my eagerness of my devotional time dwindled and it started feeling like a chore. I started doing it less and less as I was feeling better and better. God freed me from my depression, the worst time of my life, and this is how I thank Him. So saddening. I started skipping church some and now I haven’t gone to church in over a month. I felt like I could not open up to anyone there, although they were extremely nice and welcoming people. Anyway, when I first had my depression, I started experiencing conflicting thoughts about God, bad things. Things I disagreed with but they kept popping up in my thoughts. I prayed for God to soften my heart to give me more faith. God helped me so much, and I rarely ever experienced conflicting thoughts. I really struggled with it thinking “Oh, how can God still love me when I think these terrible things about Him! Things I don’t think are true!” “These thoughts are unforgivable!” One day, I woke up and had this random thought, that I know to be from the Holy Spirit, I thought “God loves me. God forgives me.” It truly felt it! I was so thankful and thanked and praised God, but I didn’t start going to church more or anything. I was very selfish and still focused on myself and my happiness in this world. However, now, it’s bad and worse! I am miserable! I keep thinking that I am a wretch! A fool! Like God describes people like me in the bible. I pray for this to go away and I calm victory over this trail. I, now, struggle with if God would forgive me again, especially now that it’s worse, in my opinion. I just would love to hear any experiences that are similar to mine because when I hear struggles I hear people talk about struggles with the world and not with God. It’s very hurtful, saddening, and I truly am miserable! I know to cling to God! I am back to being a dedicated Christian! I love God and desperately want to have an amazing relationship with God!! I don't really know what to expect as far as feedback, but I am just happy to have you all to share it with!!! I am just truly happy to share this as it is a lot to keep it inside myself! Thank you, everyone! Thank you for reading! I hope God blesses your day! <3 Thank you again! Michelle *Sorry for the bad grammar, just typing away haha.
  6. I lost my wife and daughter and it was like the world has ending but it has not because there is a reasoning I was alive but when it all happened I thought my life was worthless but it was when I read the bible that I realized that I can still make someone happy out there and that my wife and daughter left to be in a better place. Let share our pain.
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