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Why does God allow Children to die young?


luke22ministries

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I know it's been some time since this article was posted but I wanted to add to this.

Our daughter passed away March 2011. She was 14 and died suddenly in about 18 hours from a rare spleen abscess and community acquired MRSA that unexplainably entered her lungs and bloodstream. It was a horrible devastation for my husband, our son and myself as well as our extended families, her numerous friends and classmates and our community.

After her death, we saw a stream of teenage deaths in our area, some suicidal and some medical. October 2011, our daughter's best friend, since they were in preschool, died abruptly in a car accident. She was the only fatality from the accident.

I explain all of this because I have seen so much good come from both of these incidents. It's almost horrifying for me to say that but it is true. Our daughter was a very happy, loving and kind person. She had many friends, mostly because she wasn't afraid to speak her mind. She lived a lifetime in nearly 15 years. Her & her best friend lived every day to the fullest - even telling friends to "live each day like it is your last".

Since our daughter's passing, my husband has found God again, our family has grown closer, several family & friends who have struggled with the idea of God and Heaven have found the truth in their heart and I have solidified my beliefs and have a stronger faith than I ever imagined I could have. We have seen families in our area turn from drug addiction and find a new lease on life and have seen marriages near to divorce come together by finding strength from how we have learned to cope with the death of our two girls. I believe in my heart that God saw the issues surrounding us and allowed our daughter's death as a way to wake our community up and help them see the way their issues were affecting those around them.

Our daughter's friend was torn to pieces after our daughter died. She spent most of her time in the graveyard and it worried me as it seemed no one could help her cope with the loss. I prayed almost daily for her to find peace as I feared she may take her own life. In my heart I know that God allowed her death for two reasons. One - He saved her from ending her own life and two - He confirmed the question in so many hearts and minds...He confirmed that our daughter was with Him in Heaven and that He was taking her best friend to be with her so they could spend eternity together.

What I have taken away from this is that I no longer fear death or even satan. Satan tried to attack our families and our community and he failed. In my eyes he failed miserably as our girls ended up in an amazing place that is far beyond anything we could ever imagine. How do I know this? With all that has happened, I have remained sane. I have not completely fallen apart and, although I miss both of the girls horribly, I feel a calmness in my heart that I would never be able to develop on my own. When I have a bad day and I can't fight back the tears, the feeling swells in my heart as I pray for peace & understanding and I know it is coming from God. There is nothing in this world that can explain the feeling and knowledge that comes from knowing God is with you. I know with God I can conquer anything and I also know that neither space, time or death can separate me from the love my daughter, her friend and I share.

If that isn't Heavenly, I don't know what is! :th_praying:

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Guest Mjens11

Hello, All

I appreciate all your comments, I have recently lost my 26mo old daughter and am still at a loss. I'll give you all a little back ground. Keneday was a vibrant 2 year old who would sit in her high chair and fold her hands, something she had been doing for over a year. She loved to have her picture taken, which my wife took thousands of her. She was a little slow to walk, but I don't think anyone of us minded. She was truely an angel on earth she never got upset much other than when my wife would get a blizzard for herself and not get her anything. She loved everyone, she was not shy at all, and was very gentle to our then 3mo old son. She loved animals especially our 3 dogs.

The night we lost her my wife had taken her to her cousins to spend time with her kids, and just hang out. She came home and dropped her off with me, while she went to a christian party thing were they sell things. K and I watched a movie, and I got her ready for bed like every other night and laid her down for bed with little fuss. My wife came home and we just watched tv and never checked on her, which was normal. The next morning my wife asked me to go wake her up so they could go to the dentist, I went into the room and saw her face first in her mattress. I knew right then that this isn't going to be good, and I picked her up, and yelled to my wife that she wasn't breathing. I carried her to the kitchen floor and started chest compressions and called 911, but it was way too late. She was stiff and blue which was caused by a fast moving virus in her throte.

This has hit me very hard since I had really started being able to spend a good amount of time with her, since i work 60hrs a week, and was finishing my Bachalers degree. I had just been able to spend every night with her, so obviously i'm feeling horrible not being able to spend more time with her. I know she is "in a better place" but I dont see how being with her family is such a bad thing. She made an impact on so many people in her 2 plus years and has affected so many since her passing.

I don't see how any of this is fair to her or the ones that loved her. She isn't going to be able to do all the fun stuff a 2 yr old gets too do. She missed holloween, and thanksgiving. She will also miss her first real christmas ..all things that she will actually have a good time doing. Why would any god let her be taken, what reason would even make sense? I would rather die and go to hell if that would have saved her and allowed her more time to do the things we were made for and able to do. There are so many things that she didnt get to do, and so many people she won't be able to make better.

It has been 5 weeks and i've actually done pretty well. We have had so many people supporting us, but I still dont have an answer that will tell me why a perfectly healthy child should ever die so fast and by herself in her crib.

I had to vent a bit and guess I'm looking for a good valid reason. I sure wish god would say "hey matt we needed her, but you will see her again" there are no promisis really in life and death, only hope and faith. I sure hope that is enough and allow a father to see his daughter again.

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Welcome to Mjens11

Copper2WelcomeWebCopy.gif

Thanks for sharing, I have Faith that a father will see his daughter again....

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Mr matt i dont know you but brother i cried as i read your post and i wish i had the answers for you no parents should experience that ever ,My step brother lost his 12 day old son lil tony to sids and he lashed out at me wantin to know why God wanted his baby i said bubby i dont know and i will not be like the others tryin to give you answers here i feel there is no comprendible answer here God does the taking for His own reasons yet we dont understand and guess what? its ok there its ok to ask God its ok to give Him the heartbrokeness and anger God can handle it im truly sorry for your loss and i will pray for you and your family i wish i could take your pain away brother but i cant and i wont pretend to as for the sayin time will heal all wounds i disagree when it comes to children i pray that you do get comfort and someday youll get peace God bless you and your families

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by the way when said give answers like others i dont mean the folks on here i just reread my post and said ooo i better clarify that i mean folks out there ok whew i feel better im usually guilty of not clarifyin stuff forgive ole red folks ok Gbu all

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Guest shiloh357

There is arguably no pain that is worse for anyone in this world than losing a child. It doesn’t matter if it is a newborn, toddler, pre-teen, adolescent or an adult child. There is an assumed unwritten law that parents are not supposed to bury their children.

My heart goes out to those in this thread who have lost a child. I can’t imagine the pain you are going through and I am praying for you. There are no words that could be uttered that will ever make the pain go away. Only time coupled with a full dependence on Christ will help to ease the pain somewhat. I am not sure the pain ever completely goes away, but Jesus’ love is a warm balm that brings comfort, peace and strength (John 14:27, II Cor. 1:4, I Peter 5:10).

It would be nice to think that when we come to Jesus, our problems are solved and our pain and suffering is no more; but that is not what Jesus promised. Jesus doesn’t give us the answer to suffering; He gives us Himself and He suffers with us. Even though the pain is great, it is so nice to know that we have a loving Savior to lean upon in times of grief and intense sorrow. Corrie Ten Boom once said: “There is no pit so deep that God is not deeper still.” No matter how dark and hopeless things look, there is nothing we are suffering through that He doesn’t know about and He is right here beside us to carry us through it if we will let Him (Is. 40:11). He loves you and will never leave you to suffer alone (Ps. 34:18, Ps. 147:3). He is compassionate and knows the kind of loss you're feeling; after all, His own son was nailed to the cross.

I am reminded of a few of verses from the great hymn: “How Firm a Foundation:

“Fear not, I am with thee, oh, be not dismayed,

For I am thy God, and will still give thee aid;

I’ll strengthen thee, help thee, and cause thee to stand,

Upheld by My gracious, omnipotent hand.

“When through the deep waters I call thee to go,

The rivers of sorrow shall not overflow;

For I will be with thee thy trouble to bless,

And sanctify to thee thy deepest distress.”

“The soul that on Jesus doth lean for repose,

I will not, I will not, desert to his foes;

That soul, though all hell should endeavor to shake,

I’ll never, no never, no never forsake.”

You may never completely get over the loss of a child and I am not sure that you should. But there is help, hope and healing for the suffering, grieving one that comes to Jesus for relief. He loves you with an everlasting love (Jer. 31:3) and He holds you in His everlasting arms (Deut. 33:27). Jesus loves you and if you will trust Him, He will show Himself faithful. Jesus is the one Person who will never break your heart.

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Hello, All

I appreciate all your comments, I have recently lost my 26mo old daughter and am still at a loss. I'll give you all a little back ground. Keneday was a vibrant 2 year old who would sit in her high chair and fold her hands, something she had been doing for over a year. She loved to have her picture taken, which my wife took thousands of her. She was a little slow to walk, but I don't think anyone of us minded. She was truely an angel on earth she never got upset much other than when my wife would get a blizzard for herself and not get her anything. She loved everyone, she was not shy at all, and was very gentle to our then 3mo old son. She loved animals especially our 3 dogs.

<snip>

First a personal note. I’m so sorry for your loss. My mother lost two babies to miscarriages. I’m significantly older than most of my sibling so I remember the emotions and heartache a lot more than my other siblings. This is a time of pain, sorrow, and turning to God for healing. But God is the ultimate Healer of Hearts and Comforter of Souls.

Cry out to God. He will calm the storm and comfort you.

Psalms 107:28-30

28 Then they cry out to the Lord in their trouble,

And He brings them out of their distresses.

29 He calms the storm,

So that its waves are still.

30 Then they are glad because they are quiet;

So He guides them to their desired haven.

God cares for each us deeply. Including your little one.

Matthew 10:29-31

29 Are not two sparrows sold for a copper coin? And not one of them falls to the ground apart from your Father’s will. 30 But the very hairs of your head are all numbered. 31 Do not fear therefore; you are of more value than many sparrows.

God is faithful. God’s compassion will fail not.

Lamentations 3:22-25

22 Through the Lord’s mercies we are not consumed,

Because His compassions fail not.

23 They are new every morning;

Great is Your faithfulness.

24 “The Lord is my portion,” says my soul,

“Therefore I hope in Him!”

25 The Lord is good to those who wait for Him,

To the soul who seeks Him.

One day Christ will return and wipe every tear from our eyes. Praise God there will be no more death, nor sorrow, nor crying, and most importantly no more pain.

Revelation 21:4

And God will wipe away every tear from their eyes; there shall be no more death, nor sorrow, nor crying. There shall be no more pain, for the former things have passed away.

You will see your little one again. There is hope and comfort in Christ’s return.

1 Thes. 4:13-18

The Comfort of Christ’s Coming

13 But I do not want you to be ignorant, brethren, concerning those who have fallen asleep, lest you sorrow as others who have no hope. 14 For if we believe that Jesus died and rose again, even so God will bring with Him those who sleep in Jesus.

15 For this we say to you by the word of the Lord, that we who are alive and remain until the coming of the Lord will by no means precede those who are asleep. 16 For the Lord Himself will descend from heaven with a shout, with the voice of an archangel, and with the trumpet of God. And the dead in Christ will rise first. 17 Then we who are alive and remain shall be caught up together with them in the clouds to meet the Lord in the air. And thus we shall always be with the Lord. 18 Therefore comfort one another with these words.

God is close to we who are brokenhearted and saves us who have had our spirits crushed.

Psalms 34:18

The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.

God is our Father full of tender mercies and He comforts us in our tribulations.

2 Cor. 1:3,4

Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of tender mercies and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our tribulation, that we may be able to comfort those in any sort of tribulation through the comfort with which we ourselves are being comforted by God.

Mourning is a part of life. It is okay. God will comfort us.

Matt. 5:3

Blessed are those who mourn, since they will be comforted.

Take your pain to God in prayer and supplication. The peace of God which surpasses all understand will guard your heart and mind through Christ Jesus.

Phil. 4:6-7

6 Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God; 7 and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.

God is faithful to uphold those who fall and lift up all who are bowed down low.

Psalms 145:14

The Lord upholds all those who fall and lifts up all who are bowed down.

God bless you. Again so sorry for your loss. Praying for you, your wife, and your family. You are not alone. Sending a big “hug.”

:bighug:

In Christ,

GE

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Hello, All

I appreciate all your comments, I have recently lost my 26mo old daughter and am still at a loss. I'll give you all a little back ground. Keneday was a vibrant 2 year old who would sit in her high chair and fold her hands, something she had been doing for over a year. She loved to have her picture taken, which my wife took thousands of her. She was a little slow to walk, but I don't think anyone of us minded. She was truely an angel on earth she never got upset much other than when my wife would get a blizzard for herself and not get her anything. She loved everyone, she was not shy at all, and was very gentle to our then 3mo old son. She loved animals especially our 3 dogs.

<snip>

Also two poems come to mind brother:

"The world may never notice

if a rosebud doesn't bloom

or even pause to wonder if the petals fall too soon

but every life that ever forms

or ever comes to be

touches the world

in some small way for all eternity

the little one we longed for

was swiftly here and gone

but the love that was then planted

is a light that still shines on

and though our arms are empty

our hearts know what to do

every beating of our heart says

We will remember you."

~ Author Unknown

and

You never said you're leaving

You never said goodbye

You were gone before I knew it

And only God knows why.

A million times I needed you

A million times I cried

If my love alone could have saved you

You never would have died.

In life I loved you dearly

In death I love you still

In my heart you hold a place

That nobody could ever fill.

It broke my heart to lose you

But you didn't go alone

For part of me went with you

The day God took you home.

~ Author Unknown

Again so sorry for your loss. Praying for you and your family.

Have you heard of Celebrate Recovery? I highly recommend it. I believe there are groups out there that can help in dealing the loss of a loved one.

This is contact info for local Celebrate Recovery locations: http://www.celebraterecovery.com/find-a-group/north-dakota/

Looks like there is a group about an hour from where you live.

I participated in one group when I went through a time of depression and gaming addiction. The group I was in had a former homosexual, a widower, recovering alcoholics, recovering drug addicts, people who were recovering from depression, people who recovering from co-decency, etc.

Again praying for you, your wife, and your family.

God bless,

GE

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Hello, All

I appreciate all your comments, I have recently lost my 26mo old daughter and am still at a loss. I'll give you all a little back ground. Keneday was a vibrant 2 year old who would sit in her high chair and fold her hands, something she had been doing for over a year. She loved to have her picture taken, which my wife took thousands of her. She was a little slow to walk, but I don't think anyone of us minded. She was truly an angel on earth she never got upset much other than when my wife would get a blizzard for herself and not get her anything. She loved everyone, she was not shy at all, and was very gentle to our then 3mo old son. She loved animals especially our 3 dogs.

The night we lost her my wife had taken her to her cousins to spend time with her kids, and just hang out. She came home and dropped her off with me, while she went to a christian party thing were they sell things. K and I watched a movie, and I got her ready for bed like every other night and laid her down for bed with little fuss. My wife came home and we just watched tv and never checked on her, which was normal. The next morning my wife asked me to go wake her up so they could go to the dentist, I went into the room and saw her face first in her mattress. I knew right then that this isn't going to be good, and I picked her up, and yelled to my wife that she wasn't breathing. I carried her to the kitchen floor and started chest compressions and called 911, but it was way too late. She was stiff and blue which was caused by a fast moving virus in her throat.

This has hit me very hard since I had really started being able to spend a good amount of time with her, since i work 60hrs a week, and was finishing my Bachelor degree. I had just been able to spend every night with her, so obviously i'm feeling horrible not being able to spend more time with her. I know she is "in a better place" but I dont see how being with her family is such a bad thing. She made an impact on so many people in her 2 plus years and has affected so many since her passing.

I don't see how any of this is fair to her or the ones that loved her. She isn't going to be able to do all the fun stuff a 2 yr old gets too do. She missed Halloween, and thanksgiving. She will also miss her first real Christmas ..all things that she will actually have a good time doing. Why would any god let her be taken, what reason would even make sense? I would rather die and go to hell if that would have saved her and allowed her more time to do the things we were made for and able to do. There are so many things that she didnt get to do, and so many people she won't be able to make better.

It has been 5 weeks and i've actually done pretty well. We have had so many people supporting us, but I still dont have an answer that will tell me why a perfectly healthy child should ever die so fast and by herself in her crib.

I had to vent a bit and guess I'm looking for a good valid reason. I sure wish god would say "hey matt we needed her, but you will see her again" there are no promises really in life and death, only hope and faith. I sure hope that is enough and allow a father to see his daughter again.

Praying~!

David therefore besought God for the child; and David fasted, and went in, and lay all night upon the earth.

And the elders of his house arose, and went to him, to raise him up from the earth: but he would not, neither did he eat bread with them.

And it came to pass on the seventh day, that the child died. And the servants of David feared to tell him that the child was dead: for they said, Behold, while the child was yet alive, we spake unto him, and he would not hearken unto our voice: how will he then vex himself, if we tell him that the child is dead?

But when David saw that his servants whispered, David perceived that the child was dead: therefore David said unto his servants, Is the child dead? And they said, He is dead.

Then David arose from the earth, and washed, and anointed himself, and changed his apparel, and came into the house of the LORD, and worshipped: then he came to his own house; and when he required, they set bread before him, and he did eat.

Then said his servants unto him, What thing is this that thou hast done? thou didst fast and weep for the child, while it was alive; but when the child was dead, thou didst rise and eat bread.

And he said, While the child was yet alive, I fasted and wept: for I said, Who can tell whether GOD will be gracious to me, that the child may live?

But now he is dead, wherefore should I fast? can I bring him back again? I shall go to him, but he shall not return to me. 2 Samuel 12:16-23

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I realize there are two possible ways for born again person to look... out of old eyes or new ones! The New Eyes are looking through God's Word

as His Person 'IS' formed within us to see as God sees... one day God sees the same as if thousand and the thousand as the one in sameness ...

so we are left with looking out of His or ours- the freedom from the worry of the clock either early or late but rather the moment with His Presence

I choose to soak in! The child 'IS' His and I wish to worship The Lord outside of my own beginnings by breaking free of those bonds by reckoning

His Word the truth... God despite our sins remains Himself untouched as He moves through the lessons of life promising

Ro 8:28

28 And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose.

NKJV

I trust this explicitly in 'ALL THINGS' don't you... it will always depend on what set of eyes you are looking out of -the old ones OR the New! Love, Steven

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