Sign in to follow this  
Followers 0
LisaMarie savedbygrace

A phase???

17 posts in this topic

Good morning parents..

Have any of you had to deal with your child hating school?? And if so is there any advice you could give me as to what i could say to my son. He's in the 4th grade and maybe it's because he doesn't understand the work but is claiming to hate school .. He loved it last year and the yrs before that .. but i don't know if he is hearing this kind of talk from other kids and just following along..

I have talked with him about why he doesn't like it and explained the benefits of school but all he can say is "I don't care" granted when i was younger school wasn't my favorite place to be either .. but I don't recall ever having this attitude with my parents about it .

I am praying for God to guide me here.. Just was wondering if any of you had this issue and how you managed it.

2

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Lisa , are his grades fine or poor ?

Let him know that ....you are not only his mother but, his best friend...and that he can tell you any thing that is bothering him.

It seems his little spirit got hurt for some reason. Hope you find out why he doesn't care anymore.

sherry

1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

To truly understand what is in your child's heart you must get him to talk, then you must be able to listen to 'what' he is actually saying under all the layers of 'stuff'. It is best to come to the discussion with the intent of not counselling him immediately but instead with the intent of being quick to hear.

When I talk to people, I find that the longer they can go on talking, without me interjecting counsel and trying to 'fix' their problem, the deeper they go into their hearts to pull out the issues and speak them openly. Most people will throw out 'tester' things to see if your just trying to counsel them by telling them what they don't want to hear. Letting them air out the whole thing and then taking time to pray over it and sort out the facts of the matter will help give you a genuine response.

Remember that in the multitude of counsellors is wisdom.

In Jesus Name,

Gary

1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Thank you Gary..

I appreciate the reply.. My son isn't the type to just let it all out. if he doesn't wish to discuss something he will let you know. He is a slow learner and is on an I.E.P so talking to him the way i would any other 9 yr old doesn't work.he learns at a lower level so it has been a challenge for me in choosing my words carefully..

when he got up this morning the first thing he said was that he hated school and doesn't want to go anymore.. I asked him why.. he said he hates school, he said he just wants to stay home all day, go to his friends house.. etc etc.. so i just simply said " all of your friends will be at school " and his reply was " i don't care I will just go to their house" . Maybe all this is just an adjustment after a long summer.. He was off doing so much more this year with his friends and spent some time with his Dad and his other grandmother.. So .I am going to give it another week or so to let him get adjusted .. Hopefully he will settle in ..

but thanks again for the reply.. :)))

1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

To truly understand what is in your child's heart you must get him to talk, then you must be able to listen to 'what' he is actually saying under all the layers of 'stuff'. It is best to come to the discussion with the intent of not counselling him immediately but instead with the intent of being quick to hear.

When I talk to people, I find that the longer they can go on talking, without me interjecting counsel and trying to 'fix' their problem, the deeper they go into their hearts to pull out the issues and speak them openly. Most people will throw out 'tester' things to see if your just trying to counsel them by telling them what they don't want to hear. Letting them air out the whole thing and then taking time to pray over it and sort out the facts of the matter will help give you a genuine response.

Remember that in the multitude of counsellors is wisdom.

In Jesus Name,

Gary

I like what you wrote here Gary... makes a lot of sense .

1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Just keep him talking...it will surface. Sometimes there is a bit of embarrassment involved especially if he is special needs as kids can be cruel due to the sin that is within. Love, Joy, Peace, Patience, Meekness, Self Control, Gentleness, Goodness and Faith will help you to do with him as you ought so cry out to our father for a fresh filling of that Holy Spirit that the fruits be available....

Gary

1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Lisa , are his grades fine or poor ?

Let him know that ....you are not only his mother but, his best friend...and that he can tell you any thing that is bothering him.

It seems his little spirit got hurt for some reason. Hope you find out why he doesn't care anymore.

sherry

His grades are low.but once he understands something he is golden.. He made alot of improvement last year...But,Like i told Gary. he is on an I.E.P. so he has like 3 teachers in his classroom.. he is learning on a lower level than most kids his age.. I have had that talk with him and told him exactly that ..but there are those moments when he just doesn't want to tell me anything until later on..

i am praying and i am believing that God is working in him and in me.. so any prayers would be much appreciated.. love ya lady :)) thank you for replying also

1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I will be praying .

You are an encourager to us Lisa, and I know that you are that way.... to your child as well .

Love ya , too :) )))

sherry

1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Maybe you should ask the teacher. It is also possible the person that used to support him changed. Something probably changed and he feels un-comfortable. Do bear in mind that he may need more time to learn the same content as other children in the classroom. Also schools at times promote a child like yours to a higher grade even though they are still at a lower level. He might not be ready for grade-4 yet. Going to the school to investigate.

Praying

1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Maybe you should ask the teacher. It is also possible the person that used to support him changed. Something probably changed and he feels un-comfortable. Do bear in mind that he may need more time to learn the same content as other children in the classroom. Also schools at times promote a child like yours to a higher grade even though they are still at a lower level. He might not be ready for grade-4 yet. Going to the school to investigate.

Praying

Maybe you should ask the teacher. It is also possible the person that used to support him changed. Something probably changed and he feels un-comfortable. Do bear in mind that he may need more time to learn the same content as other children in the classroom. Also schools at times promote a child like yours to a higher grade even though they are still at a lower level. He might not be ready for grade-4 yet. Going to the school to investigate.

Praying

Yes George I know you're right. some will do that .. he just needs to have his memory refreshed and i know he is a bit taken back by the change.. But there will be conferences coming up so I will be meeting with the teachers.. This morning knock on wood has been good so far .. no mentioning hating or not wanting to go to school so .. thanking Jesus :)) and thank you for taking time to respond.. :))

1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Sign in to follow this  
Followers 0