Serious topic about my relationship

[Seekingguidance0023 9]

I need help. I've been very distraught today. Yesterday my father called me and begged me to end my relationship with my current boyfriend, who has been with men before and got HIV. He's currently on medication and makes it less likely that I get it. I love him. I've known him since 2010 and he makes me really happy. Should I listen to my parents? We are both 23. I'm sure my parents are praying about it and asking the church to pray. I just feel like they never let me do anything I want. I think it was wrong for my father to tell me to end the relationship. I feel so confused.

Edited April 7, 2014 by Seekingguidance0023

[OakWood 8,005]

Firstly, I'd like to welcome you to Worthy.

You've got to remember that as Christians we can't condone any sexual relationship out of marriage but I can see that you have a serious issue here.

No, you don't have to end your relationship, at least not as a friendship anyway, but you have to stop the physical /sexual side of things - not least because you are at risk of catching HIV yourself.

I think that your father is right about this, but I can't say whether he is right for him to expect you to cut your boyfriend out of your life altogether. Maybe it's time to review this relationship.

What are your feelings about this? You say that parents are praying about it. Are you a believer yourself?

[other one 24,859]

With just this little amount of information it would be very hard to make any real assessment of things.......   however your father probably has the information that I would want to know and I assume he loves you very much or he would not chance pushing you away......

 

Listen to your father...... 

[Seekingguidance0023 9]

I am a believer. It's hard because there's always been a special place in my heart for my boyfriend. Since the day I met him, I just wanted to be in his life. So I became his best friend, we get a long very well, we go out hike and do fun activities outdoors. His parents love me and think we are great together as a couple. I'm in love with him and that's why it's so hard for me. I can see myself marrying him and having his children and he's told me he wants to spend the rest of his life with me. Back in 2010, I. Would ask my mother to have her bible group pray for him and I would ask for prayer at my church for him as well. Does that mean God put me in his life so I could pray for him only or maybe my boyfriend is going through all this so he could change his lifestyle and please God now. I love my family and it bothers me so much that they feel so strongly against my relationship.

[Littlelambseativy 5,752]

Welcome to Worthy!!

You make an interesting statement - maybe my boyfriend is going through all this so he could change his lifestyle and please God. God is not pleased with that lifestyle - so I ask you -has he completely forsaken the lifestyle he was leading and given his heart fully to Jesus?

If you are a Christian ask yourself - If I came face to face with Jesus today and He asked me to account for my own time with my friend how would I answer it. Do you talk about Jesus? Do you read the Bible together, even the part that says God will not let homosexuals into heaven? I pray that you are honest with yourself and if he is a friend tell him that you care for him but you could not ever love him as much as Jesus loves him.

[other one 24,859]

have you discussed with a medical professional how difficult it is to be the wife of a hiv positive person without contacting the virus yourself......   or how difficult it is to get pregnant without you becoming hiv positive or worse your children...

 

You need to understand all the ramifications of this along with the expense involved....

 

If your boyfriend isn't a born again believer I personally would be very against you marring him as would most people here, HIV or not.  There is a lot more at stake than HIV though that would always be a major problem in your life.

[Seekingguidance0023 9]

That's very true Other One, we go to church together. I don't think he's a born again believer. I should read the Bible with him.

I've spoken to his doctor and she said we could have kids and I could take medicine so the baby wouldn't get HIV at birth.

I feel like everything keeps saying, no, don't be with him

[Guest P_W]

Welcome to Worthy!

 

Praying for you,

PrairWarur

[Seekingguidance0023 9]

Thank you PrayWarur, I really appreciate it

[OakWood 8,005]

Marriage therefore may be an option, but of course there are so many other things to take into consideration, not least the difficulties of HIV. Does he have a job, for example?