if your husband isn't a believer, or isn't there "yet"

[BeeThere]

My husband joins me at church 10+ times per year.  At least once a month, and on holidays.  We have a toddler.  If my husband were joining us every time, we would go every Sunday.  But now I only get there 2-3x per month.  I do partake in a Bible study (regularly) group and other church activities such as small group (off and on with that).  He will join us at large activities, like the Christmas party, baptisms, etc.

 

He says he believes there's a higher power, thinks he believes there's a God, but doesn't understand why God would allow for bad things to happen.  He grew up in the church and is well versed in Bible stories.  I find him even filling ME in sometimes when I have questions.  He's a little encyclopedia!

 

I am encouraged by the fact that he asks be questions when I return from worship or a study group.  He wants to know what we discussed, and often has his own opinion or feedback.

 

I think what's holding him back, is not wanting to give it all up.  Meaning - put all of his faith/trust in "something" or "someone" else.  He's also got a very scientific/mathematical mindset, so that hinders him from putting another foot in front of the other when it comes to faith.

 

Who else struggles with not having a husband who serves as spiritual leader in their household?  I feel such a void.  I'm the only one making a push to attend church, and though he does encourage my participation because he knows how much it means to me, I miss having him physically there with me.  I also wish he were prayerful, and more insightful vs. factful (is that a word?) when it comes to scripture and following God's Word.

 

It's too late.  I'm married, and in love.  He's my best friend, and he treats me with respect.  But I sometimes wonder, a small piece of me, if I made a mistake.  Or if I'm living one.  You know, by being married so someone who isn't a true believer.  Then I stop and wonder if Christ purposely put me in my husband's life to show him the way?  Most of the friends I have in my church community (or all, really) attend with their spouse.  So they don't understand my feelings.

 

I would love to hear from someone who has been there, or is standing in these same shoes.

 

Thank you.

[Littlelambseativy]

When he will run into something that is beyond his control - where will he turn? We are made to have a connection to God and without Him life is empty and meaningless - if only he could see it. As the Psalmist said, my strength comes from The Lord who made heaven and earth - we are nothing but empty vessels without Him. Keep going to church and enjoy the fellowship. Perhaps he needs to be asked to do something to feel a part of the church.

[Guest]

 

Trust in the LORD with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding.

 

In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths. Proverbs 3:5-6

 

~

 

Praying~!

[coheir]

My husband joins me at church 10+ times per year.  At least once a month, and on holidays.  We have a toddler.  If my husband were joining us every time, we would go every Sunday.  But now I only get there 2-3x per month.  I do partake in a Bible study (regularly) group and other church activities such as small group (off and on with that).  He will join us at large activities, like the Christmas party, baptisms, etc.

 

He says he believes there's a higher power, thinks he believes there's a God, but doesn't understand why God would allow for bad things to happen.  He grew up in the church and is well versed in Bible stories.  I find him even filling ME in sometimes when I have questions.  He's a little encyclopedia!

 

I am encouraged by the fact that he asks be questions when I return from worship or a study group.  He wants to know what we discussed, and often has his own opinion or feedback.

 

I think what's holding him back, is not wanting to give it all up.  Meaning - put all of his faith/trust in "something" or "someone" else.  He's also got a very scientific/mathematical mindset, so that hinders him from putting another foot in front of the other when it comes to faith.

 

Who else struggles with not having a husband who serves as spiritual leader in their household?  I feel such a void.  I'm the only one making a push to attend church, and though he does encourage my participation because he knows how much it means to me, I miss having him physically there with me.  I also wish he were prayerful, and more insightful vs. factful (is that a word?) when it comes to scripture and following God's Word.

 

It's too late.  I'm married, and in love.  He's my best friend, and he treats me with respect.  But I sometimes wonder, a small piece of me, if I made a mistake.  Or if I'm living one.  You know, by being married so someone who isn't a true believer.  Then I stop and wonder if Christ purposely put me in my husband's life to show him the way?  Most of the friends I have in my church community (or all, really) attend with their spouse.  So they don't understand my feelings.

 

I would love to hear from someone who has been there, or is standing in these same shoes.

 

Thank you.

1 Corin 7: 13-14

13 And the woman which hath an husband that believeth not, and if he be pleased to dwell with her, let her not leave him.

14 For the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the husband: else were your children unclean; but now are they holy.

something good in it so says the Lord

[BeeThere]

When he will run into something that is beyond his control - where will he turn? We are made to have a connection to God and without Him life is empty and meaningless - if only he could see it. As the Psalmist said, my strength comes from The Lord who made heaven and earth - we are nothing but empty vessels without Him. Keep going to church and enjoy the fellowship. Perhaps he needs to be asked to do something to feel a part of the church.

 

^ I do not know.

[BeeThere]

 

...

1 Corin 7: 13-14

13 And the woman which hath an husband that believeth not, and if he be pleased to dwell with her, let her not leave him.

14 For the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the husband: else were your children unclean; but now are they holy.

something good in it so says the Lord

 

 

A reference to scripture!  This is exactly what I needed to hear.  It sounds as if I am exactly where I am meant to be.

 

THANK YOU!

 

Time to memorize another verse. 

[kwikphilly]

Blessings BeeThere!

   Welcome to Worthy..................I could never say whether you made a mistake or not ,,,,,only you know the answer to that ,you & God(& your husband)

You did know all these things before you married him and it did not stop you from marrying him,so what's different?

   You know,we serve a Mighty & Loving Father that is very compassionate,He can turn anything into something for our good(despite our choices),He desires that none should perish & He can soften any heart & He does hear our prayers,,the prayers of the righteous availeth much.

     Knowing about God doesn't have anything to do with knowing God,even the demons believe.................Perhaps the change has occurred in you,maybe you now desire to put God first in your life and that is why you are feeling so strongly the unbelief in your partner?Be faithful & trust God,as I said,,,,,,He works all things for the good of those that love Him.......continue to follow Him ,wherever He leads....Place Him before everything & everyone & seek that intimate relationship with Him,pray without ceasing......Maybe your spiritual growth just might provoke your hubby to jealousy....to want what you have when he sees that inexplainable Joy of the Lord in you,Glory to God!The best way to lead is by example & that does not have anything to do with going to church(although church is a good thing) .........the rest is a job for the Holy Spirit                                                                         With love-in Christ,Kwik

[B3L13v3R]

Hi BeeThere!

I thought to put these few Scripture verses out there with some comment.

1Pe 3:1-4
(1)  Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands; that, if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation of the wives;
(2)  While they behold your chaste conversation coupled with fear.
(3)  Whose adorning let it not be that outward adorning of plaiting the hair, and of wearing of gold, or of putting on of apparel;
(4)  But let it be the hidden man of the heart, in that which is not corruptible, even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price.


In keeping in subjection and loving God first, be in *subjection to your husband in hopes of leading him to Christ by your godly conversation.
If he does not obey God or His Word and is not yet a Christian, he may be won over to Christ by the Truth you speak and the life you live for Jesus.
God looks on the heart, man the outside.
Do not look to be shabby, but at the same time don't bother with a lot of fancy makeup, jewelry or clothing.
Let you beauty be shown from the inside, where God Himself lives in the Christian. Honestly living in a gentle, quiet spirit. This in the sight of God is of great value.
And of course, pray!

*Subjection is misconstrued at times, God does not expect one to put up with physical abuse with a spouse as a handful have taught.
And while, thank God, your husband is not that way, I still felt should be mentioned.


Praying

[Rosiegirl3]

Praying for you!

[Guest LadyC]

my husband has come a long way, but he may never be a spiritual leader in our home. he has a deep faith, and says he always has, although i never saw it emerge until a few years ago. i don't think he's ever had a really PERSONAL encounter with Jesus, though. it's as though his faith is all abstract or something. mine gets that way at times, too... you know, the "i have faith that God CAN, just not necessarily that God will for ME" mentality. it's a struggle.

 

we don't have a church home here. he works every other weekend and likes to sleep in on the other weekends. i tend to not go to church often because he isn't with me. when we lived in vegas, though, i had a church home... he didn't go with me often, but i went nearly every week. it wasn't just a church home, it was my church family. and even though he didn't go often, he was loved dearly by everyone there. it was a small, recovery church, so he was enveloped in prayer by a lot of people.

 

just keep praying for him, that God will reveal Himself in a powerful and meaningful way to him.