I received word from Kwik a little bit ago. She said that she appreciates everyone who has reached out so much!
She said her husband ("Snow") got her a hotel room in a safer area and she's on the last leg of prep to leave by 3pm her time. She has a neighbor who's helping with some of the bigger things that needs to be done. She has a full tank of gas and some cash on hand. Praise God!!
She is to be leaving within the next 2 to 3 hours and will send me a quick message before she leaves out. But after that, a 3 hour drive could take 6 to 8 hours, or even more, depending on traffic. So we just pray and trust God to get her there safely, and we'll hear from her when she arrives and gets settled in with her 2 sweet kitties.
God bless you all,
Before being able to walk in Christ, is it not wise to seek Christ first to find Christ so you can fully know who or what Christ is? I don´t think you can walk in Christ when you do not know who or what Christ is. I think you can only walk in Christ when you know who or what Christ is. So seek Christ first with all your heart so that you find Christ so you then can walk in Christ.
"Seek and you shall find." - Jesus (Matthew 7:7)
"You shall know the truth." - Jesus (John8:32)
Hello, First of all I want to say hi I am new at the forum.
I really need advice and help from other Christians in a situation that's been a problem for me since I was a little girl. I'll try to make this post as short as possible.
I've always had problems with my mom. She has always been very immature and irresponsible. I remember being 5 years old and thinking about how immature she was when she had tantrums against my grandmother, who practically raised me. My parents were both teenagers, but my dad has always been more responsible. My mom wanted to "live life" and enjoy youth so it was my dad and mostly my grandma who took care of me. During this time my mom was very irresponsible and had a lot of boyfriends..one of this relationships resulting in a pregnancy and we never saw the dad again, we live in a small town, so it was scandalous. My mom and I lived with my grandmother until I was 5 when my mom remarried and my stepdad took my brother as his. I was physically hurt by both my mom and stepfather, my stepdad used to hurt me a lot emotionally I still struggle with those things. Until my teenage years I was an excellent student, I earned a lot of awards and my mom was never there, she became addicted to her job, she left the house before 6am and got home after 10pm. During all this time I was very active at church and even a leader at teenager spiritual retreats. What I mean is, that instead of going rebel I became model child. This didn't stop my mom beating me for me getting a B or just being mad and me thinking it was unfair. I went back to live with my grandma. During all this time my mom kept on having more children... none of which she made the time for. She has never been maternal,still she kept on having more and more kids.
For all my life I've always been closer to boys than girls. A therapist told me it was because of my relationship with my mother I didn't trust women. I saw women being promiscuous and emotionally hurting my male cousins and it gave me emotional breakdowns, I wondered if I was the only woman on Earth to not be a bad person or use my body and sex to manipulate others. It still gets me nervous to see girls showing skin on social network. At age 20 I moved with my boyfriend who had also been one of my closest friends since I was 14. We weren't married since he was an atheist and I stopped going to church. We had a lot of problems and he didn't want to go to couple counseling or anything else. We also had a son during this time. Thank God, in 2013 and my then boyfriend now husband accepted Jesus as his savior and is now an amazing man and leader at our Church. He loves to serve God and other through our Church. We got married. I have been blessed. Still... my husband's conversion to Christianity came along with the confession of things I didn't yet know that he did through our relationship. Like him talking to other women on social media during years... one of which he had sex with. Even though my husband has done everything a woman could ask to rebuilt the relationship, I know I will never fully heal, and this made my feelings against promiscuous women a lot worse. Do not get me wrong, I know it was my husband who failed me, but since I had the repulsion for seek attention, promiscuous women... and then seeing the woman... that was it. As I said, I just cant stand the look of a woman showing her bodyon social media , offering themselves and trying to get married men, etc. It was my mom all over again. I now link these women to that woman my husband had an affair with and my mom.
About 5 years ago my mom and I seemed to fix our relationship. My stepdad and my mom were going to Church and both were leaders there also. Late last year my stepdad and mom separated. And ever since my mom is back into her old ways. So far she's been with at least 4 men that we know of and is neglecting my brothers. She even asked for my approval for this behavior !!!! I replied with an extense and loving letter telling her to do things right, and telling her how much her behavior had hurt me to this day and that I don;t want my brothers to suffer the same... she never even replied. Not even "ok". She just kept on doing it. My brothers are hurting and are starting to hate her. She comments on my social media pictures saying that i look ugly or that i look like a man.... she makes fun of me all the time about EVERYTHING.... just like an immature teenager. I have nightmares all the time and spend all my evenings crying over my husband's shoulder.
So recent as this morning she showed me pictures of yet another guy who my grandma know to be a married man. I had a breakdown today and I talked very nasty against my mom. Not to her directly but other people.I said the most terrible things about her and finally said out loud that I hated her.... I don't know what to do. I know I am not being a good Christian and that I am supposed to honor my mother and father.... but then.... does this mean that my mom can do all kinds of sins and then just ask for forgiveness and God will take her back... but God will not take me because of the terrible things I feel against my mom??? Will I not be saved because of the hurt other people has caused me ?? I've had therapy, they do help, but nothing heals. I KNOW it will never heal. I wish it wasn't so, but is reality I just know myself. I am afraid for my relationship with my mom... I know it wont belong until i have a breakdown every time I see her, it is as if this whole situation activated the way I felt with her when I was very young. I am afraid for my relationship with God... I know God is not proud of my words thoughts and feelings against her. What do I do !? Please help. Thank you.
Hello there WorthyChristianForums Community, I couldn't find a better section to write my personal story, I hope you read it until the last word because otherwise you won't get the idea.
This is my story as a Lebanese person living in Israel and a message to the people around the world.
I'm a young person who suffered from war and lost the childhood he was supposed to live surrounded by his family and friends. In a normal day Israel withdrew unexpectedly from South Lebanon after twenty-five years of war followed by many Lebanese families who served under the Israeli regiment, who had little choice but to, leave or die as was promised by the terrorists that were and still in Lebanon.
We barely made it out alive leaving everything behind, some lost their lives even as we were trying to escape. We were shot at the border as we were denied to enter Israel at first. The only thing I took with me is a toy. We were held in a place that was full of mad and depressed people, so much yelling and crying, kids and grownups, people from all ages trying to find their loved ones and see if they survived.
I don't remember all that happened that day and why did our car disappear, i was told they blew it up.
Later on I found myself in a safe place living in a bungalow and riding a bicycle with my friends the whole day, the sea is few meters away from us, everything is alright, peace, no shooting, no booms no screams and cries, well, as far as I remember, you must keep in mind i was just a child… and my uncle's family is at the same place. My parents asked around to know where is the rest of the family, until we finally got to know that we have only two uncles here, one on my mom's side and one on my father's side and the rest remained in Lebanon. Later we were moved to another place leaving one uncle behind and joining the other. (Not by choice)
After two years we were moved to a new place. Fresh new life, we rented an apartment, got some furniture, but no uncles and no cousins around, we didn't know anyone.
Israel helped us moving and aided us some, slowly we understood that it will be hard to get back to Lebanon and that wasn't a thing I really wanted because of the fact that... Lebanon is in a deep war, bombs everywhere and people dying every day, and because of the fact that if we return to Lebanon my father will be imprisoned and they will torture him like they did to my grandfather, an old man, he was jailed and beaten and denied medication.
Fifteen years passed since the day we came to this country. During these years I have met so many people, from all religions Jews, Muslims, Druze and Christians. I wish I could get to know some of them more and I wish I didn't meet some. What I learned by being around them is that religion is not the main problem. The problem is that everyone believes that this land is theirs to keep and want to kick the rest out or even kill them if they could.
What they don't understand is that this land is not going with them after they die, instead of sharing it and enjoying life for what it really is, they make it hard for everyone.
The reason behind our involvement is because we didn't want the people who were seeking asylum in Lebanon from using our homes as attack bases to fire on Israel which they did and to protect our families from rape, theft, being kidnapped and killed like they did to one of my uncles that i didn't get to know. As a result the South Lebanese people decided to unite and make an army by the order of the legitimate Lebanese government to keep peace in our lands under the Israeli regiment. Muslims, Druze, but mostly Christians stood together and joined the army to protect their home from terrorism and to stop the killing and the kidnapping. Now each and every person who was in the South Lebanese Army that left to Israel is considered a traitor in Lebanon. The terrorist organization is forcing the Lebanese people to believe that they are the protectors of Lebanon and that we the South Lebanese people who left to Israel and the Israeli people are the real terrorists. I can't blame my country it never had a moment of peace, throughout history nations conquered it and enslaved its people, there is no real government because anyone who has the power can take it and do whatever he likes, no one can really protect it from the terror, and most of Lebanon leaders support the terror because they are scared of them.
Things escalated since, we got attacked by our own people, let alone those who sought asylum in Lebanon, and so we fought back, we alongside the Israeli people fought terror, we wanted to protect and free our land. But by year 2000 Israel decided to withdraw from Lebanon as it wasn't really leading anywhere and it was costing them a lot, money and blood, as it did us.
Most of the families had young children like my family, who had me and my brother on the way, didn’t think twice and left, but the older people like my grandparents were unable to leave, they were rooted to their home and land.
My grandmother and grandfather lived alone they didn't see their grandchildren growing and not their own children, my grandfather left us while I was writing this, I can't explain my feelings.. I wanted to be next to him I wanted to help him… I wish I can be next to my grandmother this moment…
South Lebanon is an hour drive from us but we cannot visit for a second, leaving to Lebanon will be permanent and may cost us our lives.
Despite all we have been through and being mistreated on several occasions, we were raised to be good to everyone and to forgive and forget… It's not easy though, especially when you are reminded of it every day by people who refuse to forgive or forget or try to understand.
We have been living in a Jewish City for thirteen years (Arabs live in separate cities and settlements). We've seen a lot, bad things and good things, things like being called Arabs in school and being hated for it, even creating random fights with us just because we speak the language. Although I had a great teacher who took good care of me and helped me like I was her son and even helped me to find a job and she is a religious person. A while after I started college and started traveling around the country I was really surprised to hear for the first time from Arabs - Christians, Muslims, Druze what do they think about us. Confusing… Honestly… I'm a traitor in some people eyes… a weak person who betrayed his country… and living between Jews… can't be any worse, they actually hate us and make fun of us. Christians didn't welcome us especially at first, we found our cars smashed when we went to pray in one of their churches, so we can't expect the rest to treat us any better. Some people think that all the Lebanese people are the same as they see them in Media – Having fun, hanging out with many women, drinking, poker, casinos… no this is not South Lebanon! We were not able even to go to Beirut… The Jewish people main problem is thinking that we are "Arabs" ... as long as I talk Arabic around them it will be weird for them and I understand that… but for those some who got to know us, they started to show us some respect, supporting us morally. It is enough to get a smile from a neighbor, especially that we are living between them and we study with them, to make us happy. While studying software engineering I met a great Jewish friend who changed some of my views and I respect him like my brother (He lives in a village close to the border of Israel and Lebanon). It’s really confusing... From all the religions there are some people who like us and some who don't... But if you ask me who I like more or who I feel more close to?
I will say "Don't hate, forgive, and respect me for who I am"
In those fifteen years living in Israel we've had a lot of troubles, starting from all kind of people around who think that we are "Arabs" and "Terrorists" and "Betrayers" for not understanding who we are and what we went through, to personal issues as the Epilepsy of my brother that crashed us, and thank god he is alright now.
I can't say that Israel should have helped us more than it did, but separating between us was a bad move, for us that is. For them they got what they wanted, two groups busy disliking each other over envy with no combined effort to pursue anything from the country… Two groups that one of them got more and the second one got much less, it's not fair… the result today is that one group has their own house, a new car, and having a normal life even traveling abroad … While the second group are struggling to raise their families dreaming about the day they might have a house that they won't be kicked out of. We personally moved 6 times from house to house ruining our stuff and paying a lot of money moving because the house owner decided to raise the rent.
My family consists of five people, two parents and three sons, two of them under age, living in a rented two bedroom house paying for it 2,500 Shekels plus municipality taxes. After paying the rest of the bills, we are left with little money that we can't afford to buy the required food and clothing, my dad found himself at the end of every month in a bigger debt having to ask the bank for a loan after a loan to be able to go on, and asking all the government organizations for help and for a public housing that kept rejecting us. I respect him and I will never forget how strong he is for keeping us together and teaching us what’s right and what’s wrong, and for fighting to feed us with all the mental and financial pressures and every other hurdle, so many things that I learned from him and I will be passing it on. I can't explain how my mom is important in my life, the one problem she has is that she couldn't work and she's not able to work, I won't explain it here, but she is the heart of this family, she made me and my brothers so close to each other to take care of each other, to love each other, to forgive each other no matter what happens.
I finished my high school years plus college and I got employed, I have been working for almost half a year and I'm helping my family a bit now, it is going to be hard for us to reach the main goal to buy a house for our family to live in and finally say we have a home and it's ours, let alone pursue my own life and my family to be… with all the problems that we have such as my little brother and mom's health issues "Celiac disease" (They can't eat anything that contains wheat, almost every product has wheat added just for the weight) just makes it harder to us because we must pay four times the normal price for their food, while we are fixing the damage that have been caused by the loans. I know that we are not the only family struggling to survive, many around the world are. However, it's important for me to pass this over so people around the world understand that we are not bad people, all we did is try to protect ourselves and our loved ones. Our presence in Israel isn't by choice, Israel after all is for the Jewish people, always been, always will be, it's not for us (A fact that was made clear through many occasions and by several means) but … Where else can we be?
We have fallen prey to political games and we were too weak to do anything about it, I wish I could see Lebanon again for few seconds just to see my house and my family… my grandparents who aged alone. I want to feel how it is like being at home or to belong to somewhere, and not spend my days being shunned by the people I am living amongst for a crime I did not commit.
It has been quite the journey and I still have a lot to tell, who knows what fate is holding for me.
I will be working hard in the few next years trying to save money to be eligible to take a loan to buy a house or even to immigrate to another country searching for a better life, if I didn't mention it before life in Israel is very expensive with little income to the common man, but it's hard to find a country that will accept us all, maybe I can do it alone but it is hard for me to leave my family after all what we have gone through together. (I must say that this is only one story from so many more Lebanese who live in Israel who suffered a lot)
If you wish to comment on my story , or offer any advice, you can reach me on email@example.com
I would like to add and thank God very much for his guidance if it wasn't for our strong faith no christian lebanese family would have survived.
Thank you for reading and God Bless.