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Remarriage after divorce


Warrior777

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I do not believe God shows favoritism. But He is a God of order. For example, Is the wife the head of the husband? Is the husband the head of the wife? Are both the heads? or neither?

 

 

Who is the head of the husband?  Who tells the husband to love his wife as Christ loved the church?

 

Do you have an idea of how many 'Christian' men claim the very verse you constantly bring up and 'forget' what comes after it?

 

I'd like to remind you that you compared marriage to slavery.....and sorry, but the Bible does tell Christians to submit to one another and that would include the

marriage relationship as well

 

That may be inconvient for some men but there is a good reason for those instructions...IMO, that would be because too many men enjoy the word submit

and misapply the word submit to 'do as I say'

 

Please don't twist what I said and make it appear that I said the husband is not the head of the home...the Bible says he is...BUT and that is a very big but,

Christ is supposed to be the head of the husband and that is NOT the reality in many many cases.

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@faith pleases God

I suggest considering that people don't care how much you know until they know how much you care.

Consider listening to these two songs:



Are you pointing a finger or holding out a hand?


And...

1 Cor. 13:1-3

13 If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. And if I have prophetic powers, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have all faith, so as to remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. If I give away all I have, and if I deliver up my body to be burned, but have not love, I gain nothing.

  

Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things

 

 

How to balance speaking truth without compromise but speaking truth in love in this (and in all) situation? This is something I struggle with too...

God Bless.

GE

I didn't know I was talking to someone other than the original poster and whoever responded to me. It's weird to me to judge how much or little someone cares over a couple of posts. I'm trying to be concise.

But just curious, what is better? Someone who loves someone dearly very much and just wants them to be happy in the life, but gives them advice that leads them to Hell?

Or someone who appears dry and stern, but gives them holy guidance causing one to turn away from sin that leads them to everlasting life? 

 

Interesting. I agree we should speak the truth as found in Scripture. All I can read are your words. And to me (as well as others) it doesn't seem like there's much love in them. Perhaps it is just perception. But curious... Will divorce lead someone to hell?

God bless,

GE

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I love people GE. Very Much!! And I love marriage!

 

I believe in repentance, grace, mercy, love, compassion,and forgiveness!! Very much! These are the reasons against divorce. I also believe in miracles, and the power of God and prayer!!

For me, ownership is a weird way to look at it. But I would say they each own each other 100%.

I think using abuse as an out is a slippery slope and almost anything can be abuse to someone. And almost everyone who divorces uses that justification. I just don't see it permissible in scripture. In many ways divorce is the murdering of a family. Many use the excuse God doesn't want me to live like this, I deserve better, etc. and use abuse (mental, emotional, physical, spiritual) as a justification. Divorce is a wicked, wicked thing and should be hated! Are we to hate what God hates? If we are and I stand on scripture, why do you dismiss me as uncaring or unloving? I am answering a question of doctrine in general. 

God Bless you also.

 

The reason I bring up ownership is you compared the relationship of marriage to that a master and slave. You might be able to see why some here react to that. You yourself say that it is a weird way to look at it... Please clarify. Which is it then?

Right, this is a question "should a person remarry after divorce" you are answering of doctrine in general. Your answers come across as very much "I'm right" and "everyone else is wrong." Maybe it's just my perception. Maybe it's because you have no experience in the matter.

Since Qnts2 shared her experience let me explain why I view this differently. I have two experiences with this. The first is my in-laws. My father-in-law divorced when he was very young. His 1st wife didn't want to be married to him any longer. He tried to win her back but she was not interested in being married to anyone who was going to be a preacher. He then married my mother-in-law. They have been married for decades. Yet there is an underlying movement that says he shouldn't have gotten re-married. People have through the years made him feel shame and guilt over his 1st wife's choices. I don't think it's the gracious thing to do to keep poking at an old wound.

My sister was married to someone who was a narcissist. There was physical abuse, emotional abuse, and psychological abuse. There was also infidelity involved with no sign or repentance. At least pastor and many friends actually told her she should not leave her husband. This while she was loosing weight to a dangerous level and shutting down completely as she became a shadow of her former self. Thankfully, she did leave him and is now doing much better. According to some she should not re-marry. I believe she should re-marry and try to find a Believer who will show her what a true husband is like. Loving her as Christ loved the Church.

I simply cannot agree that in every case a person should not re-marry. Of interest I thought much like you a few years ago. Everything to me was black and white. I'm learning some things are really more a shade of grey and one really needs to better understand the full situation to fully appreciate what is going on. And then too there's the aspect of grace and mercy. Of beauty and restoration. Of a God who loves us sacrificially. Of forgiveness and making things new.

God bless,

GE

 

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Hi Golden Eagle,

 

I hear God`s heart in what you say. Those examples were not the ones with the `hard hearts,` but had to deal with the consequences of their partners `hard hearts.` Praise God for healing of such deep wounds. The greatest betrayal.

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There is no simple answer. Was the bible created for man or man for the bible? According to Paul the things that were written down were for our learning. When I was immature in my faith I was very perverse and legalistic in my application of the scriptures to any life situation. Everything God did has been out of love as God is love. There is a time to marry, a time to divorce, a time to remarry as well as a time to stay unmarried after divorce. Love is the answer. One might think that divorce and remarriage can never be the way of love. Let that one alone to live by their conscience. For them to do so cannot be love. Love has done a great many things. Love sent a whole nation into captivity and dispersed among the nations. Love flooded a world to save 8 people alive. Love knows when to say when. Love knows when to say yes or no. Follow after love in everything. We live in perilous times and love demands we act according to the best interest of all involved including ourselves. So whatever we do with marriage, divorce and remarriage it must be done in love. Let no man tell you that you cannot do what love demands because of some silly legalistic narrow view of God through a personal perception of scripture viewed as dogma because they think so. Live according to love as God gives you ability. Wouldn't it be grand if no one ever divorced? God bless all who marry!

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I do not believe God shows favoritism. But He is a God of order. For example, Is the wife the head of the husband? Is the husband the head of the wife? Are both the heads? or neither?

 

 

Who is the head of the husband?  Who tells the husband to love his wife as Christ loved the church?

 

Do you have an idea of how many 'Christian' men claim the very verse you constantly bring up and 'forget' what comes after it?

 

I'd like to remind you that you compared marriage to slavery.....and sorry, but the Bible does tell Christians to submit to one another and that would include the

marriage relationship as well

 

That may be inconvient for some men but there is a good reason for those instructions...IMO, that would be because too many men enjoy the word submit

and misapply the word submit to 'do as I say'

 

Please don't twist what I said and make it appear that I said the husband is not the head of the home...the Bible says he is...BUT and that is a very big but,

Christ is supposed to be the head of the husband and that is NOT the reality in many many cases.

 

I agree their are many "BAD" husbands!!! That do not treat the wife as Christ treats the church. My reference was that if God tells a slave not to leave the bad master, then how much more should a wife not leave a bad husband? 

I don't mean to personally offend you. I am sorry. I do not know your story. I do pray for you and love you and I hope you do the same for me. I am sincere in that I am truly trying to seek true doctrine and when I find it, to live and stand on it without compromise.

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@faith pleases God

I suggest considering that people don't care how much you know until they know how much you care.

Consider listening to these two songs:

Are you pointing a finger or holding out a hand?

And...

1 Cor. 13:1-3

13 If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. And if I have prophetic powers, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have all faith, so as to remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. If I give away all I have, and if I deliver up my body to be burned, but have not love, I gain nothing.

  

Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things

 

 

How to balance speaking truth without compromise but speaking truth in love in this (and in all) situation? This is something I struggle with too...

God Bless.

GE

I didn't know I was talking to someone other than the original poster and whoever responded to me. It's weird to me to judge how much or little someone cares over a couple of posts. I'm trying to be concise.

But just curious, what is better? Someone who loves someone dearly very much and just wants them to be happy in the life, but gives them advice that leads them to Hell?

Or someone who appears dry and stern, but gives them holy guidance causing one to turn away from sin that leads them to everlasting life? 

 

Interesting. I agree we should speak the truth as found in Scripture. All I can read are your words. And to me (as well as others) it doesn't seem like there's much love in them. Perhaps it is just perception. But curious... Will divorce lead someone to hell?

God Bless,

GE

Sin leads to Hell and death. We should not willfully sin after receiving knowledge of the truth. However, I will not ask who ascends or descends. I am not the deciding factor for one's salvation. However, you should have clean hands and a pure heart. You should also work out your salvation with fear and trembling... no?

Divorce is not adultery. We are talking about remarriage and what is adultery. 

Although this is a sensitive issue, there is a simple answer. And Jesus gives it. He did not say it's complicated when asked, did He?

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this one is too easy
 
For the woman which hath an husband is bound by thelaw to her husband so long as he liveth; but if thehusband be dead, she is loosed from the law of herhusband.
Romans 7:3So then if, while her husband liveth, she be married to another man, she shall be called an adulteress: but if herhusband be dead, she is free from that law; so that she is no adulteress, though she be married to another man.
 
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Sin leads to Hell and death. We should not willfully sin after receiving knowledge of the truth. However, I will not ask who ascends or descends. I am not the deciding factor for one's salvation. However, you should have clean hands and a pure heart. You should also work out your salvation with fear and trembling... no?

Divorce is not adultery. We are talking about remarriage and what is adultery. 

Although this is a sensitive issue, there is a simple answer. And Jesus gives it. He did not say it's complicated when asked, did He?

 

 

The issue is in evaluating this discussion on marriage, divorce, and re-marriage one must take a look at the entire flow of Scripture.

Again, let me rephrase my question.

If a person divorces and re-marries yet they claim Jesus Christ as Savior are they going to face eternal death (hell)?

God bless,

GE

 

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I agree their are many "BAD" husbands!!! That do not treat the wife as Christ treats the church. My reference was that if God tells a slave not to leave the bad master, then how much more should a wife not leave a bad husband? 

 

 

I don't mean to personally offend you. I am sorry. I do not know your story. I do pray for you and love you and I hope you do the same for me. I am sincere in that I am truly trying to seek true doctrine and when I find it, to live and stand on it without compromise.

 

But where are you getting that view from? A slave/master relationship is very different to a wife/husband relationship. Since they are different then one can not apply the same answer. What must also be remembered is that slaves were set free in the end unless they chose not to be in which case they voluntarily became slaves for life. People also became slaves because they had a debt they could not pay. Women did not become wives because they could not pay a debt. I will explain what you are doing using a maths sum. You see a statement saying 6 times 7 equals 56 then assume 6 plus 7 also equals 56. Mutual submission as instructed by the bible for a marriage is not like a slave/master relationship where one must obey whatever they are told. 

 

 

 

Divorce is not adultery. We are talking about remarriage and what is adultery. 

Although this is a sensitive issue, there is a simple answer. And Jesus gives it. He did not say it's complicated when asked, did He?

 

Although perhaps we should consider the way most (if not all) denominations interpret adultery there is probably not a single married person who has not committed adultery.

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