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cruel, selfish adult children


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:12:  I love my kids very much and I am having such deep hurt that they treat me as though they don't love me at all. It is especially hard since I was once close to them, even as adults. So much is changing!

 

Also, this abuse of intense arguing (or else being ignored completely) is interfering with my many medical conditions. It is wreaking havoc with them!

 

Please pray God restores their love for me and family harmony.

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Praying for your situation.  

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My Precious Precious Sister...

    You are not alone but rather than go into MY personal experiences,,,,,as I find it does not really help to hear anyones war stories,,,,,as a matter of fact at times we can be made to feel they are just minimizing our struggles.............that is the last thing I would ever want to do because I know how badly you are hurt & it breaks my heart,,,,,,so let me say it this way....

    From much experience with adult children(& knowing you and the loving mom you are)I think I can say with every confidence that your children never(not for a moment)ever STOP loving you .....I truly believe that they go through periods in their life that they do not love themselves & they take it out one the one they love the very most,their mother......the one that loves them unconditionally.....& they know that

     Turtle,,,,I believe one day you are going to hear the words I hear all the time....."I always loved you Mom & I will always love you"...............Darling Sister,there was I time I thought just like you and I gave up completely & just entrusted my son to our Father.................I said to myself that HE only entrusted him to my care for a little while,as I was needed & it was time to give him back............thats when things changed,& it was not over night,,,,it took years.But I surrendered ,I had no control,I had nothing left that I could do and with my own submission in it& just trusting God,,,,,,God Comforted me those years,,I never worried,I never felt lonely,I never felt unloved...................it took a Miracle to bring my son to Christ & God is full of them but we have to let go & let God.It is not easy Beloved,it hurts but not for long................they love you,trust in our Father

     BTW,I love you too :bighug2:                                                      You Sis,Kwik(standing in the gap!!!!!!)

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Thanks much for your prayers, ncn and Joe! They make a difference...in this life and for eternity. God knows how much we need to "Pray one for another." I believe that Prayer changes things. And prayer changes us, as well. Amen? ...For when all else we try fails, thank God that we have the precious promise in scripture that God gives us permission to boldly approach His Throne of Grace with our heart's longings. "He is our Refuge and our Fortress. In Him will we trust."  

 

Joe- it's been a long gap since corresponding. I tried writing you back, but my messages kept deleting. Some problems happened then (pre-surgery) with the pm system for me. I sure hope you read this and send me a pm (when you are able.) I miss talking with you and wish to fellowship again with some of my old pals from days gone by. How the years just flew by, hey?

 

Kwik...you are one of a kind blessing in my messed up life. You are a newer, but a never-could-be-replaced type of a friend. How it touches me that you acknowledge my deep hurt and feel for me! This is  is something that is so important to me...(as I know it is to you.) And I definitely appreciate you taking the time to try to help me gain a better perspective on things with my children. But here's where the confusion and frustration come in. I have already come to God in prayer in earnest and I thought that I had truly surrendered them to Him. I can't figure out what I am doing wrong.  You see my anguish?  I am at a standstill.

 

The sad fact is that it has been 13 years since my daughter has let me actually have a relationship with my only grandchild! To even SEE him! Now he is at that age that he just wants fun, peers, and no relationship with some old handicapped Grandma. I can't blame him. His Mother cheated both of us of the bond that could have been, had she not been withholding him as a way of punishing me. She even told me it was her way of revenge!

 

And my son is extremely worldly and shuts me out of his life. This is a far cry from the days I believed he was Born Again and we spent time with God together! But that was over 12 years ago!! So they have cast God out of their lives and I guess my Light (Namely, Christ) and their darkness block us from interacting as we live in two very different worlds that do not mesh. 

 

I will keep putting this in God's Hands...as I have been. But His timing is not what I humanly view as fast, by any means. Over a decade with each child! I yearn for their love more than words can say. Most of all, that they would each develop a spiritual hunger again. Because right now God ( and me)  seem to be the furthest things from their mind. Thanks for standing in the gap, Kwik and for the nice hug!

 

Sorry this is so long. But maybe it will bring more responses than just three 

and help others? I'm sure on a Christian website this size there are others who share my struggle and are perhaps 'willing to step up to the plate', admitting this? And offering ideas of how to cope in this dillema. ( I again thank you for your thoughtful and kind reply, Kwik. Especially in this time of loss for you!)

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