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Pornography, sexual abuse etc after effects, shame shame shame


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Praying~!

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I have a lot of shame about this but I have been addicted to pornography since I was about 12 years old. I believe I can and will overcome this with God's help, but I find that when I get upset about what has been done to me sexually I feel worthless and fall into this sin over and over again. It's really had to explain why...I guess I feel worthless because of what's been done to me and so I just watch pornography to hurt myself.

 

I know that this is not God's best for me by a long shot. I know that this is so wrong and I hate what I do. I don't know how to overcome this. 

 

Is there anyone here who might understand me, and be willing to keep in touch? I need to talk to some God centered people!

 

Thank you for reading this....x

Porn is not the problem, because if it was not porn, it would be something else, like any addiction. But porn allows you to engage your feelings enough to be able to get you out of your own natural self, away from all your weird and painful feelings about your life and you.

You were born naked, that does not make you a porn star does it? So what happened that you need so much distraction? You have lost that loving feeling of life somewhere, long before porn came into it, haven't you? Who or what hurt you? Your mind may have excluded those things, Denial is not just a river in Egypt.

Your subconscious must be in horrible pain and anguish to need such high levels of distraction by your own feelings.

Isn't it wonderful how God gave you such a capacity to feel and enjoy sexuality. It really is amazing isn't it? But what hurts is that you can't get enough to make you feel like life is worth living. That's because porn is not the issue. The devil would like you to keep thinking that. It's a trap.

Addictions = hidden pain.

You are suffering - on some level, perhaps deeply - not on the surface. But you probably can't face your suffering, you know why? Because it is easier to make yourself feel guilty, than to face what is really hurting you. With this addiction you have some control over that pain, whenever you feel awful you can play with your own feelings and escape it. But the real issue is not being addressed.

You know people are experts at denying and forgetting what throws them off the pathway of happiness. And the devil gives them a simple addiction, and makes them think that the addiction is the problem and then he can grind their faces into the dirt until they give up. That tragic game is now over, do you hear me?

You are going to go to counselling, and find out the real problem of what is causing you to suffer inwardly. You will become empowered to solve your own problems, by understanding yourself, and not ignoring your needs.

You are longing for approval, longing for purpose, for calm, dignified maturity. Somehow those elements have been stripped from you, and you need to find out where and how, and the Lord will be with you on this long journey, step by step and share your victories. You have a lot to face and overcome, and when you have, you will be a mighty power for good in the world. you will be a thorn in the devil's side.

 

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Porn is so accessible now that every guy that is not living on the moon has or does look at porn. 

It does give a false view about sex and relationships on many levels because it is edited scripted and involves acting.

This can put unrealistic pressures in real life. Sex may not be that good and certainly not that long. 

Porn is just an easy cash cow and people need to see it for what it is. It has no baring on real life and will ruin any relationship where sex is all that matters. 

I don't know about addiction to porn. I suppose that means you cannot get through the day without it but I use to like that with alcohol, which is more harmful to health and I use to smoke but not for many years.

With any addiction you got to pray to God and keep praying until He gives you the strength and or grace to be free of it. 

 

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One of the biggest holds that porn has is the stealing of a God's intended way of enjoying the female
and being fulfilled by her and vice versa .... God saw the need of this here

Ge 2:18
18 And the Lord God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him.
KJV

when we became sin we turned to the only source we had left and that was inward -self-centeredness-;
we became a people focused upon self needs and self wants etc... If one has The Spirit of God within them
they have all the resource they need to examine and reform their thinking about all that porn is and all that
it is not... in this light it becomes ugly and unattractive even perverted into the disgusting of ones own heart...
Place what is precious there like your Mother or Sister or Wife or Daughter~ see what a vile thing it is and then
agree with God in repentance and turning from -for there is no life within it! Another thing is to realize the
actual eternity we are moving too where there will be no such activity... if God does not see a need to continue
it we should see the need to make it a daily less importance ~ making ourselves ready for our eternal home with
Him!    Prayed... Love, Steven

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What I find sad is a woman who feels the only way she can make an income is to sell her body or display her body to the world for money. Her self worth much be zero :( My heart goes out to them.

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1 hour ago, bopeep1909 said:

I find sad is a woman who feels the only way she can make an income is to sell

yes but in the porn industry the Proverbs 7 strange woman reins- many are in it out of desperation, but many are in it because of the vicarious power they feel they have over their audience-- most of these women know exactly what they are doing to men

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2 hours ago, bopeep1909 said:

What I find sad is a woman who feels the only way she can make an income is to sell her body or display her body to the world for money. Her self worth much be zero :( My heart goes out to them.

So true, peep.  Some of the most messed up and sad women I have ever known behaved as you describe above.  A good man wants a woman who is secure enough with herself to be attractive in jeans and a tee shirt.  And a good man doesn't need pornography to feel like a man.

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We all have been through it to a certain degree. Praying :) 

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4 hours ago, woundeddog said:

yes but in the porn industry the Proverbs 7 strange woman reins- many are in it out of desperation, but many are in it because of the vicarious power they feel they have over their audience-- most of these women know exactly what they are doing to men

How much of it is from past abuse?

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3 minutes ago, bopeep1909 said:

How much of it is from past abuse?

just as there are wicked men---- there are wicked women

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