Godlovesme Posted June 8, 2015 Group: Members Followers: 0 Topic Count: 2 Topics Per Day: 0.00 Content Count: 26 Content Per Day: 0.01 Reputation: 20 Days Won: 0 Joined: 09/09/2013 Status: Offline Share Posted June 8, 2015 I got a question and I'm really struggling with this lately. " he don't care about me or my feelings, so why should I keep pretending he does" this keeps running thru my head, several years of marriage, turning the other cheek, I keep forgiving and overlooking this and that, but it's a daily battle, he can't even say good morning, never know where he is at or what he is doing, even basic politeness is gone and quite honestly never existed , ever. There is no I'm going to be home late or how is yor day, quite honestly I could do anything I want and truly never worry about giving a answer because he don't even ask nor shows any interest in my life or day. I honestly feel like a intruder in my own home and because he makes more money then I do and has to foot more of the bills, he feels like he owns everything , everything is his and if I don't like the way he is I can leave attitude. I keep looking to God and have managed thru by the grace of God, but the hurt it goes so deep and one begins to harden themselves to their spouse in order to deal with the daily isolation and feeling like you don't exist , not even in their presence are you remotely acknowledged. I'm trying to be a good Christian and I have to work at it daily to control my thoughts towards him and remind myself God is in control. But some days, like today I swear I can't take another day of it Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The_Patriot21 Posted June 8, 2015 Group: Worthy Ministers Followers: 28 Topic Count: 338 Topics Per Day: 0.05 Content Count: 15,676 Content Per Day: 2.46 Reputation: 8,497 Days Won: 39 Joined: 10/25/2006 Status: Offline Birthday: 02/27/1985 Share Posted June 8, 2015 Praying Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
missmuffet Posted June 8, 2015 Group: Royal Member Followers: 34 Topic Count: 1,989 Topics Per Day: 0.49 Content Count: 48,687 Content Per Day: 11.89 Reputation: 30,342 Days Won: 226 Joined: 01/11/2013 Status: Offline Share Posted June 8, 2015 I got a question and I'm really struggling with this lately. " he don't care about me or my feelings, so why should I keep pretending he does" this keeps running thru my head, several years of marriage, turning the other cheek, I keep forgiving and overlooking this and that, but it's a daily battle, he can't even say good morning, never know where he is at or what he is doing, even basic politeness is gone and quite honestly never existed , ever. There is no I'm going to be home late or how is yor day, quite honestly I could do anything I want and truly never worry about giving a answer because he don't even ask nor shows any interest in my life or day. I honestly feel like a intruder in my own home and because he makes more money then I do and has to foot more of the bills, he feels like he owns everything , everything is his and if I don't like the way he is I can leave attitude. I keep looking to God and have managed thru by the grace of God, but the hurt it goes so deep and one begins to harden themselves to their spouse in order to deal with the daily isolation and feeling like you don't exist , not even in their presence are you remotely acknowledged. I'm trying to be a good Christian and I have to work at it daily to control my thoughts towards him and remind myself God is in control. But some days, like today I swear I can't take another day of it It sounds like you are being neglected and abused.Do you think there is someone else in his life?Been there done that.It sounds familiar.Do you think he is narcissist? He is not being the husband that God wants him to be.If you could confirm that there is infidelity involved you could file for a divorce or a legal separation.If he makes more money than you do you would be compensated.Do you have children?Please pray for this man and your life continuously.Do you have any support at all regarding your situation? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Godlovesme Posted June 8, 2015 Group: Members Followers: 0 Topic Count: 2 Topics Per Day: 0.00 Content Count: 26 Content Per Day: 0.01 Reputation: 20 Days Won: 0 Joined: 09/09/2013 Status: Offline Author Share Posted June 8, 2015 I don't believe he is having a affair, it's his personality, never does anything wrong mentality and never apologizes, if you get offended or hurt by his behavior it's because you choose to not because what he did or does is hurtful or offensive. It's so frustrating and their is no emotional connection that keeps a person to keep hanging on, but I do, love starved is what one could call it Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Godlovesme Posted June 8, 2015 Group: Members Followers: 0 Topic Count: 2 Topics Per Day: 0.00 Content Count: 26 Content Per Day: 0.01 Reputation: 20 Days Won: 0 Joined: 09/09/2013 Status: Offline Author Share Posted June 8, 2015 I just need god to heal this marriage before I break.mentally and emotionally, don't care about compensation or that stuff, just want the hurt to stop. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wingnut- Posted June 8, 2015 Group: Royal Member Followers: 39 Topic Count: 101 Topics Per Day: 0.02 Content Count: 7,673 Content Per Day: 1.32 Reputation: 7,358 Days Won: 67 Joined: 04/22/2008 Status: Offline Share Posted June 8, 2015 Praying Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
missmuffet Posted June 8, 2015 Group: Royal Member Followers: 34 Topic Count: 1,989 Topics Per Day: 0.49 Content Count: 48,687 Content Per Day: 11.89 Reputation: 30,342 Days Won: 226 Joined: 01/11/2013 Status: Offline Share Posted June 8, 2015 I don't believe he is having a affair, it's his personality, never does anything wrong mentality and never apologizes, if you get offended or hurt by his behavior it's because you choose to not because what he did or does is hurtful or offensive. It's so frustrating and their is no emotional connection that keeps a person to keep hanging on, but I do, love starved is what one could call it Then where is he spending all of his time that is not accounted for?Do you know for a fact where he goes? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
missmuffet Posted June 8, 2015 Group: Royal Member Followers: 34 Topic Count: 1,989 Topics Per Day: 0.49 Content Count: 48,687 Content Per Day: 11.89 Reputation: 30,342 Days Won: 226 Joined: 01/11/2013 Status: Offline Share Posted June 8, 2015 I just need god to heal this marriage before I break.mentally and emotionally, don't care about compensation or that stuff, just want the hurt to stop. Then I will pray for you Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
alien224 Posted June 8, 2015 Group: Diamond Member Followers: 8 Topic Count: 82 Topics Per Day: 0.02 Content Count: 1,762 Content Per Day: 0.38 Reputation: 869 Days Won: 2 Joined: 08/09/2011 Status: Offline Birthday: 02/24/1964 Share Posted June 8, 2015 Praying. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Godlovesme Posted June 8, 2015 Group: Members Followers: 0 Topic Count: 2 Topics Per Day: 0.00 Content Count: 26 Content Per Day: 0.01 Reputation: 20 Days Won: 0 Joined: 09/09/2013 Status: Offline Author Share Posted June 8, 2015 Thank you. Sorry for the rant I just don't know what to do anymore but keep praying,, Bo peep I honestly don't know where he is 90% of the time, sometimes I get lucky and over hear a conversation then I kinda know what's going on, and I believe he is just wasting time here and there that sorta stuff, guy stuff I suppose. I've tried talking to him on several occasions about how that feels but it goes thru one ear and out the other, then hurt is piled on top on hurt and the cycle never ends. I've cried, got mad, pleaded, even tried the 40 day love dare, I'm a a complete loss and I'm a woman and it's hard to pretend you have no emotions when you feel so alone and frustrated. Problem is my heart is hardening towards him and I know it's a survival instinct in order to deal with it everyday, but then he says I'm cold, I can't win. Always feel like I'm doing something wrong or if I was prettier or skinnier or I tried harder. I did get to the point I realize it's his character and not mine and when satan reminds me of he don't love you that I rebuke it and try to think happier things only for him to come home and pretend I don't exist and confirm what Satan says, then I try to overlook it and pray and try to get through the night. To many years this has gone on and it takes a toll on you on anyone I would believe. I try not to take it personally now but it has messed with my head mentally and emotionally. My end game is I hope I get to see Jesus when I die and it will all be worth it, but afraid I'll lose my faith in this war because sometimes I just want to give up. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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