Jump to content
IGNORED

Unsure with the Direction of My Life


Recommended Posts


  • Group:  Members
  • Followers:  0
  • Topic Count:  1
  • Topics Per Day:  0.00
  • Content Count:  2
  • Content Per Day:  0.00
  • Reputation:   0
  • Days Won:  0
  • Joined:  09/27/2016
  • Status:  Offline

I have been in several relationships throughout high school and college - all which ended horribly. I was young, stupid, and the 'good' I was doing ended up to be manipulative and emotionally abusive. I am very happy that those ex's have left me so they can have a better life. Since then I have met God who has guided me to the peace I have been looking for. I however feel that I'm still a mess and undeserving to be in another relationship. Those relationships I had in school were with wonderful and intelligent girls who loved me dearly yet I ruined it and their lives.

Every now and then I would think back to how I have hurt my past ex's and be very sad. I also am very happy that they had the courage to leave me so they can have a better life for themselves. I felt like I don't deserve to be in another relationship.

One day I bumped into a girl and we started chatting. We slowly became good friends and then we started dating. I told her about my horrible past and even though she was hesitant I managed to convince her to date me. I did try very hard to not fall for this stranger, but everything about her was beautiful and I thought I was given another chance to make things right. For the very first time I decided to try my absolute best to be the perfect boyfriend and to reflect weekly on my actions so I can improve myself to be an even better partner for her.

We dated for several years, and were inseparable. She was very patient and understanding as we guided each other to become even closer. She was a devoted Christian, and she became my Christian mentor. Last month she decided to break up with me because she needed sometime to rethink her life. I understand as she has a lot of personal things to do and need time to re-prioritize her life. She also mentioned that she hates being away from me because she is afraid I will leave her (my past involves cheating on my ex's among other things) and that I may not be there for her when I need her the most. I was very heart broken but I sort of understand where she is coming from. Sadly we broke up.

I still miss her very much. I am known to be a very hard worker, and I have never worked at anything so hard in my life. Everything I do I have always tried to put her first. I love her dearly and do want the very best for her.

I am thinking of contacting her to see how she is doing, and if she perhaps wants to try to restart our relationship. But a part of me is afraid that I will hurt her more - just like my previous relationships. I feel like it is safer if I don't enter another relationship as I'm afraid I'll hurt my partner very much, as proven by history. But a part of me feels like I am now mature enough to 'grow' into a wonderful partner and to ask God for guidance.

I feel that I'm at a crossroad and I don't know what to do. If I wait any longer, I'm afraid I will loose this perfect girl permanently. At the same time, if we do end up together, I'm afraid I may end up hurting her even more and prevent her from finding a better partner. I feel very confused and spent last night and this morning seeking guidance from God. I guess I just don't know what to do, and I just feel very lost.

Link to comment
Share on other sites


  • Group:  Worthy Ministers
  • Followers:  56
  • Topic Count:  1,664
  • Topics Per Day:  0.20
  • Content Count:  19,763
  • Content Per Day:  2.39
  • Reputation:   12,160
  • Days Won:  28
  • Joined:  08/22/2001
  • Status:  Offline

 Hi :)

First and most important question are you a born again  christian? 

 

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites


  • Group:  Worthy Ministers
  • Followers:  22
  • Topic Count:  86
  • Topics Per Day:  0.03
  • Content Count:  6,828
  • Content Per Day:  2.43
  • Reputation:   9,555
  • Days Won:  4
  • Joined:  07/18/2016
  • Status:  Offline
  • Birthday:  11/10/1986

Interestingly, the Bible makes no mention or recognition of "dating" or boyfriends and girlfriends. There are those who are single, those who are engaged, and those who are married.

Are you ready to be a good, loving Christian husband? Is she ready to be a good, obedient Christian wife? Do either of you know what it really means to be married and living for God in your marriage?

Edited by OneLight
Removed YouTube Link
Link to comment
Share on other sites


  • Group:  Worthy Ministers
  • Followers:  23
  • Topic Count:  155
  • Topics Per Day:  0.02
  • Content Count:  7,464
  • Content Per Day:  1.02
  • Reputation:   8,810
  • Days Won:  57
  • Joined:  03/30/2004
  • Status:  Offline
  • Birthday:  12/12/1952

Hi and welcome to Worthy!

Link to comment
Share on other sites


  • Group:  Worthy Ministers
  • Followers:  96
  • Topic Count:  304
  • Topics Per Day:  0.08
  • Content Count:  18,094
  • Content Per Day:  4.65
  • Reputation:   27,773
  • Days Won:  327
  • Joined:  08/03/2013
  • Status:  Offline

Blessings zhuru

     Welcome to Worthy     Glad you are here,Praise Jesus!

You did mention this now "ex" girlfriend is a Christian & you have found some kind of Relationship with God,she was (as you said) a CHristian mentor for you......we are unsure if you yourself are a CHristian.....you have posted in the Seekers Lounge(Outer Court) which we reserve for unbelievers,seekers & guest that they may ask questions about our FAITH & interact with us,you can see where our confusion lies....

    So,if you are a Christian we can move this THread to the Proper Forum(Inner Court) you do not YET we are not accountable for the things others dohave access because you need tne minimum of required posts(I PM'd you more info)    Okay,back on Topic.....

    You seem much more focused on carnal gratification & here is usually where many problems start .......if you want the Beautiful Life More Abundant,FREE in Christ that is available to all Believers then you have to seek Gods Guidance & direction to change you hearts desires and hunger & thirst for things ETERNAL,not TEmporal......Peace,Love,Joy,Comfort all come to the New Creature in Christ....first the REnewal of your Mind must begin with the Heart & MInd of Christ

    THis young lady said she was "afraid" to lose you by being away from you? HUh? She seems to want her cake & eat it too,she broke up with you but would like to oput you on a shelf for a later time if she changes her mind,not very fair -is it? Firstly,if she has "broken up" with you then she must also let go & not keep you on a string...BUT,you are not accountable for her actions,only your own     I would suggest you stop focusing all your thoughts on girlfriends & relationships & focus on our FIRST LOVE,God in Christ Jesus......when you REceive & Understand TRUE LOVE then you will be ready for a real relationship with a woman oif God

     Perhaps this is the ONE,the woman God has for you.....don't you trust Him? If she's the one then God Will show you & open up the Perfect opportunity to pursuit her(or she will) in His Perfect Time,,,,,,she is wise to want to prioritize her life & you should do the same,,,,God is NUMBER ONE PRIORITY,First & Foremost,all other THINGS Will be added,,,,,,,,,,,,,Trust in our Lord,Praise Jesus       Read His Word,learn,grow,draw nearer to HIM                           With love-in Christ,Kwik

Link to comment
Share on other sites


  • Group:  Members
  • Followers:  0
  • Topic Count:  1
  • Topics Per Day:  0.00
  • Content Count:  2
  • Content Per Day:  0.00
  • Reputation:   0
  • Days Won:  0
  • Joined:  09/27/2016
  • Status:  Offline

angels4u, yes, I am an un-baptized Christian (if that is possible). I do believe in God and follow his scriptures.

BK1110, we both are not ready to marriage, but we are good loving Christian boy/girl friend that can grow into husband/wife.

RustyAngeL, I think holding only onto faith for me is quite difficult. I do try and I know that God's will will always be done. It is sometimes hard for me to relinquish control of my life and put it in God's hands. Do you have the same problem as I do?

Kwik, sorry, I do consider myself a Christian but I have yet to be baptized. I am wondering how to you tell if there is a perfect opportunity for me to reconnect with her? What if I miss this opportunity? Is the opportunity something that you feel, or that God has told you that it is a great opportunity?

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.
×
×
  • Create New...