To the ladies

[HisFirst]

Are you still inspired by Proverbs 31?

I have read some negatives about this chapter - 

[dservant]

On 10/16/2016 at 2:19 AM, HisFirst said:

still inspired by Proverbs 31

don't whether allowed to post to this, but it would seem negative to be trying to attain some trait or skill that she is not designed for. such as a businesswoman striving for a homemaker-type personality 

[missmuffet]

On 10/15/2016 at 6:19 AM, HisFirst said:

Are you still inspired by Proverbs 31?

I have read some negatives about this chapter - 

I think the woman in Proverbs 31 is to be respected. There are not many of them left in our world today. Please give me reference to the negative about Proverbs 31.

The chapter begins with King Lemuel recounting advice his mother had given him. She exhorted him to not fall to weaknesses that would compromise his position as king, but to care for the poor. One of the weaknesses the king’s mother mentioned was the susceptibility of his strength—or “noble character” (31:10)—to be harmed by improper relationships with women. Although verses 10-31 do not directly follow this warning in the original, they do illustrate a fitting description of what kind of woman Lemuel should seek.

   ¹⁰An excellent wife, who can find?
       For her worth is far above jewels.
   ¹¹The heart of her husband trusts in her,
       And he will have no lack of gain.
   ¹²She does him good and not evil
       All the days of her life.

A good, supportive, trusting wife is a blessing to a man. A woman who partners with her husband, who is reliable and looks out for his interests, gives a man a security that is greatly lacking in the world. She is worth more than a substantial paycheck. To bring in the metaphor, wisdom provides the same benefits—it is worth more than money, you can always trust it to make the right decision, and it provides blessings for those who have it.

   ¹³She looks for wool and flax,
       And works with her hands in delight…
   ¹⁹She stretches out her hands to the distaff,
       And her hands grasp the spindle…
   ²⁷She looks well to the ways of her household,
       And does not eat the bread of idleness.

The wife of Proverbs 31 isn’t afraid of work. She gets up in the morning and gets things done. In the time of Solomon, this involved making fabric and sewing clothes, but verse 27 certainly applies directly to us today—taking care of our responsibilities is a characteristic of wisdom.

   ¹⁵She rises also while it is still night
       And gives food to her household
       And portions to her maidens…
   ²¹She is not afraid of the snow for her household,
       For all her household are clothed with scarlet.
   ²⁰She extends her hand to the poor,
       And she stretches out her hands to the needy.

Another characteristic of wisdom is the grace to help others. The Proverbs 31 wife ensures that those under her care receive what they need—food, clothing, protection. And she is able to serve others out of the excess of her work and the leaning of her heart. She has so internalized her role as a provider that it extends past her immediate responsibilities and into the community.

   ¹⁴She is like merchant ships;
       She brings her food from afar…
   ¹⁶She considers a field and buys it;
       From her earnings she plants a vineyard…
   ¹⁸She senses that her gain is good;
       Her lamp does not go out at night…
   ²⁴She makes linen garments and sells them,
       And supplies belts to the tradesmen.

Beyond that, she’s savvy. She’s educated about the world and the world of business. She knows how to use her skills to provide for her family, and she’s not afraid to go interact with that world, whether it be as a merchant or a buyer. She knows how to use her strengths to her best advantage, and she fully realizes how valuable her efforts are.

   ¹⁷She girds herself with strength
       And makes her arms strong…
   ²²She makes coverings for herself;
       Her clothing is fine linen and purple.
   ²⁵Strength and dignity are her clothing,
       And she smiles at the future.
   ²⁶She opens her mouth in wisdom,
       And the teaching of kindness is on her tongue.

The Proverbs 31 woman not only knows her worth, she knows her responsibilities to herself. She would not be able to provide for others if she neglected her needs—both physical and spiritual. She makes sure her appearance reflects her respected position as an influence in her community. Her greatest strength is her wisdom—her accurate judgment about the world and her influence in it. And she is quick to share the wisdom she has gained to encourage others to reach their potential.

   ²³Her husband is known in the gates,
       When he sits among the elders of the land…
   ²⁸Her children rise up and bless her;
       Her husband also, and he praises her, saying:
   ²⁹"Many daughters have done nobly,
       But you excel them all."
   ³⁰Charm is deceitful and beauty is vain,
       But a woman who fears the LORD, she shall be praised.
   ³¹Give her the product of her hands,
       And let her works praise her in the gates.

She knows that, as a partner in her marriage, she has a tremendous influence on her husband’s ministry. She can integrate her life—both domestic and professional—with her ministry in such a way that her husband has the freedom to serve. In fact, her reputation is so established, that it bleeds off onto him.
The Proverbs 31 wife is a fierce provider and protector for those she cares about. She is wise to the ways of the world, but lives by the wisdom of God. As in the rest of the Proverbs, these specific examples provide a metaphor for the larger truth. How any individual woman exemplifies these characteristics will depend on her situation, gifts, and abilities. The key is in verse 30, just as it is in the beginning of Proverbs, in 1:7:
But a woman who fears the LORD, she shall be praised.

https://gotquestions.org/Proverbs-31-virtuous-woman.html

[Jayne]

Proverbs 31 is scripture and is inspired like everything else in God's Word - so it should be a positive thing.

I think what happens with Proverbs 31 is that people don't stop to think this was written to men, not women.  This was the counsel of King Lemuel's mother to him in becoming the kingly leader that God wants him to be.

AND - no one ever starts at verse 1, they always start at verse 10 - why IS that?

Her counsel to him is this beginning in verse 1:

• Don't marry for the wrong reasons and/or don't have relationships with women for the wrong reasons; those types of relationships will destroy your leadership.
• Stay sober or your leadership will become perverted.
• Rule justly and defend the poor and oppressed.
• Choose a wife carefully - look for qualities of strength, honor, initiative, hard work, someone who fears the LORD, and someone other people look up to and praise.

Proverbs 31 is not a "laundry list" of chores for wives.  And when you make this a job description for wives and women, it becomes an impossible goal to attain.

 

[missmuffet]

5 minutes ago, Jayne said:

Proverbs 31 is scripture and is inspired like everything else in God's Word - so it should be a positive thing.

I think what happens with Proverbs 31 is that people don't stop to think this was written to men, not women.  This was the counsel of King Lemuel's mother to him in becoming the kingly leader that God wants him to be.

AND - no one ever starts at verse 1, they always start at verse 10 - why IS that?

Her counsel to him is this beginning in verse 1:

• Don't marry for the wrong reasons and/or don't have relationships with women for the wrong reasons; those types of relationships will destroy your leadership.
• Stay sober or your leadership will become perverted.
• Rule justly and defend the poor and oppressed.
• Choose a wife carefully - look for qualities of strength, honor, initiative, hard work, someone who fears the LORD, and someone other people look up to and praise.

Proverbs 31 is not a "laundry list" of chores for wives.  And when you make this a job description for wives and women, it becomes an impossible goal to attain.

 

It definitely is a good goal to have. We are not perfect. With God's help we can try our best to be the wives and mothers that God wants us to be.

[Guest bonnieschamberger]

I dont think I have strong feelings either way ...whatever way God designs each one of His beloved daughters is wonderful whether they naturally fit into that or other things

[AngelofAshes]

I am inspired by her, but I'm not married soo.. ^w^;

However, I find a lot of women who are christian who are married feel like they have to keep up with the Jones'/the proverbs 31 woman/Titus 2 woman lifestyle and they find it exhausting or impossible. I just think they're looking at the book wrong. It should be inspiration to live out the basic concepts not her actual life.  It's not a list of duties a woman should do, however, more so it's characteristics women  who are godly and good to marry should have. Integrity, goals, wisdom, organization, fear of God, etc.

I agree with the poster that said that this proverb is to men about how to find a good wife and what things to avoid as a ruler.

[JohnD]

Walter Martin used to say "the man is the head of the house but the wife is the neck that turns the head."

For all the pomp and bravado of males down through history, as went women so went the world.

While all people are of equal worth in God's eyes, we are unique as individuals and specialized in specific roles. The world wants to wipe away these distinctions. And their influence is quite strong and convincing. With few exceptions, no woman can play football with the mastodons who play football. With few exceptions, no man can raise children the way mothers can. 

We cheer on the underdog often for going against the specialties of gender (the girl who tries to make it in a man's role etc.) but in that cheering let's remind ourselves it is their attempt we are cheering not despising the specialty of the gender or the role.

[HisFirst]

I read Prov 31 a lot and its personally very important to me. Having been brought up by a single father without a mother figure (he never re-married), this small chapter is like gold to me.

MM, I cant give you specific sites about negatives towards prov 31 as they have been passages of sites that I have briefly read, like Christian womens blogs or googling about prov 31 . The negatives are basically that the bar is set high but to me its wonderful because the bar is set by a fellow female! 

They are qualities that are sdmired by other females whether they admit it or not and qualities a mother wants for her sons future wife - by this, mum knows her son will be cared for and the kids as well. 

This is one strong woman both physically and mentally in my books?

Prov 31 woman is my role model, am so grateful its in the Bible.

 

PS.

I do find that we women in the West by wanting to be mans equal, we have taken on some male characteristics, especially in the workforce But Prov 31 shows you thst you can be a capable, business woman without having to be this hard nosed, donineering cut throat competitor to be accepted or get ahead in the workforce.

The Biblical example is kind with sweetness And wisdom to boot. A gentle, soft answer/direction  is more welcoming than a bark.

 

 

 

[HisFirst]

On 17/10/2016 at 11:07 AM, dservant said:

don't whether allowed to post to this, 

Yes you can ?