struggling26 Posted October 31, 2016 Group: Members Followers: 0 Topic Count: 1 Topics Per Day: 0.00 Content Count: 5 Content Per Day: 0.00 Reputation: 1 Days Won: 0 Joined: 10/30/2016 Status: Offline Author Share Posted October 31, 2016 4 hours ago, BK1110 said: You need to work on yourself as a Christian first, before you go looking for a relationship. We are commanded very clearly and strongly not to marry unbelievers...and frankly, the Bible recognizes three relationship statuses; single, engaged, and married. This idea of dating forever, living together unmarried, fooling around...all of it very much not Christian. If he's an atheist and you plan to live as a Christian, and raise Godly children, then you have no business being with him in a relationship. But that frees you, in a way. You can pray for him, daily and fervently. Give him some time, and if you approach him again, you can do so as a friend, not a romantic interest, which it seems he has no interest in anymore anyway. Show him that you're concerned for his well being first and foremost, and not getting involved in a relationship like that. thank you. yes im working on my relationship with God right now. Im struggling but hopefully i'll find my way. it's really uncomfortable. i still feel the pain, regret and guilt though it's already been four months. i still dont know how to let all this go to God. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BK1110 Posted October 31, 2016 Group: Worthy Ministers Followers: 22 Topic Count: 86 Topics Per Day: 0.03 Content Count: 6,857 Content Per Day: 2.42 Reputation: 9,581 Days Won: 4 Joined: 07/18/2016 Status: Offline Birthday: 11/10/1986 Share Posted October 31, 2016 Just keep praying and trying. God doesn't expect 180s overnight. He's concerned with the state of your heart, and by your continued desire for Him and effort towards growing in your relationship with Him, you clearly demonstrate the changed heart He looks for. Trust in His finished work and know that it will lead to the growth of His personal work in you in due time, time only He knows. God bless! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RustyAngeL Posted October 31, 2016 Group: Worthy Ministers Followers: 23 Topic Count: 155 Topics Per Day: 0.02 Content Count: 7,464 Content Per Day: 1.02 Reputation: 8,810 Days Won: 57 Joined: 03/30/2004 Status: Offline Birthday: 12/12/1952 Share Posted October 31, 2016 18 hours ago, struggling26 said: I am a believer but he's an atheist. I am working on my relationship with Christ right now. My ex is struggling and depressed because of his father's death. I am also really concerned about him. I know he needs help. i just dont get it why he's pushing me away. all i can do is pray for him. is there any more I can do? You can pray for him but you cannot be with him if you are a true born again believer in Jesus. The Bible is very clear, that you are not to be unequally yoked with an unbeliever. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RustyAngeL Posted November 4, 2016 Group: Worthy Ministers Followers: 23 Topic Count: 155 Topics Per Day: 0.02 Content Count: 7,464 Content Per Day: 1.02 Reputation: 8,810 Days Won: 57 Joined: 03/30/2004 Status: Offline Birthday: 12/12/1952 Share Posted November 4, 2016 On 10/30/2016 at 10:15 PM, missmuffet said: Let him go. You can pray for him. Is He a Christian? She said he is an atheist. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ayin jade Posted November 5, 2016 Group: Worthy Ministers Followers: 44 Topic Count: 6,178 Topics Per Day: 0.88 Content Count: 43,795 Content Per Day: 6.22 Reputation: 11,242 Days Won: 58 Joined: 01/03/2005 Status: Offline Share Posted November 5, 2016 The best way to cope is to pray for him. Pray he comes to know the Lord. Pray he is comforted in his grief. And then grow in Christ yourself. Get in to a good solid church. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marilyn C Posted November 5, 2016 Group: Worthy Ministers Followers: 30 Topic Count: 266 Topics Per Day: 0.07 Content Count: 13,182 Content Per Day: 3.49 Reputation: 8,483 Days Won: 12 Joined: 12/21/2013 Status: Offline Birthday: 10/06/1947 Share Posted November 5, 2016 On 31/10/2016 at 0:03 AM, struggling26 said: I have a boyfriend of two years. On our first year, we were together working away from our homes. We lived together by ourselves on the first month, 2nd to 6th month we had separate apartments and from 6th til our 14th month, we lived together again with another friend. Til one day my father got sick and I needed to go home. We had an LDR for a year til June 2016, his father died. He had a complicated relationship with his father. They fought a lot and never patched up until his last week at the hospital. Although we were fighting a lot, i went to the funeral and spent the 4 days with him. He even introduced me to his whole clan. Until 2 weeks after the funeral, we had a small fight and he never talked to me for 10 days. I initiated contact and he said he doesnt love me anymore. I left him alone for 1 month then again initiated contact and got the same answer. He really doesn’t love me anymore and doesn’t see me in his future. Again after two months, i initiated contact again and still got the same answer however he kept on blaming me that I never made him happy during our relationship, that he was happier before he met me, he got sick and tired of me always complaining and whining ( complaining about my family, finances & work cause my life is somehow stressful at the time i was with him) and that i choose to sleep rather than talk to him when we fight about little things. He blamed me for everything and said it’s too late for me. and the last thing he said was “please have some respect, I haven’t forgiven myself because of my father, don’t bother me”…. I know he’s still grieving and depressed but all that he said affected me so much and made me question whether what we had was real and even makes me hate myself. I may have took him for granted but I loved him with my all. I really dont want to lose him but it seems he shut me out of his life. Please help me. I pray night and day but i get so frustrated and depressed too. I want to comfort him and be there for him but he’s shutting me out. Please anybody, I don't really know what to do at this point. I have thought about our relationship and everything i did and i may have hurt him but unintentionally cause of how i deal with things. As a Christian, i was hypocritical. But now, all those wrong ive done i want to make right. im trying to be better. is there any more i can do to alleviate the pain of my ex or just be there for him? is there any way i can make it up to him? ive confessed all these things but the pain, guilt & regret just kills me. Hi struggling, Oh I so feel for you - two years together & now the pain of separation. `Dear Lord, I pray for my sister who is indeed hurting & struggling. I know you are with her. I pray that she `feels` your tender loving care & strong arms about her. May she draw closer to you & learn of your ways that bring to peace & life. In Jesus` name.` It seems you are both going through the grieving process. The young man because his father died. An awful devastating time for him, & for you, the agony of being rejected by the one you loved & have shared life with for two years. Now I see that amid life`s trauma`s we can learn important lessons to help us go on. I see that your friend brought up that you complained a lot. People in general complain all the time. However, this is an attitude that has been highlighted that was not helping in the relationship. Thus I would suggest you work with the Lord on being an encouraging person. Any difficulties bring them to the Lord & leave them with Him. Then you wont be complaining to others. So practice being thankful everyday - for your saviour, your health, your family, your friends, the world around, little things, beautiful flowers, a child`s smile, etc etc. Learn to find these things in life & the difficulties wont be so overpowering. As to your relationship with the young man. Well he needs time to heal, & so do you. I think you have invested all of yourself in him & that is dangerous for no one can fulfil us, only the Lord. As you learn to trust the Lord in everyday life, your inner self will grow stronger & you will look for a partner who is also stronger in their spirit & thus can share your life in the Lord together. All the best, praying for you, Marilyn. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Willa Posted November 5, 2016 Group: Worthy Ministers Followers: 68 Topic Count: 185 Topics Per Day: 0.04 Content Count: 14,224 Content Per Day: 3.33 Reputation: 16,647 Days Won: 30 Joined: 08/14/2012 Status: Offline Share Posted November 5, 2016 Living with anyone outside of marriage is called fornication and the Bible says there won't be any fornicators in heaven. So it is good that you have stopped living with him. God doesn't bless sinful relationships. But it we are also told not to be mismated with unbelievers. So I agree that you should look for someone who is strong in their relationship with Jesus and who helps to strengthen your faith. Find someone that you can read the Bible with and pray aloud with. Ask God to help you to find a godly man. It does hurt to be rejected and cut out of his life when you want so much to comfort him and encourage him. My husband used to do that. He cut off 4 fingers at the joints and was grieving the loss, was in physical pain, and was angry with himself for making a stupid mistake that caused the accident. So I understand how much it hurts you. He would come in the door, I would tell him I loved him, and he would demand "What for?". Then he would go straight to bed. It was because he was hurting so much he withdrew in defense. He couldn't chance being hurt even a little bit more, so his answer was to avoid me. I even yelled at God and told Him it's not fair. I didn't blame God and was not angry at Him, I just needed to yell and express my pain. Do determine in your heart to forgive your ex. God did comfort me and give me strength. But I found strength and comfort in the Bible, especially the Psalms and the Beatitudes. Do read your Bible. Faith comes by hearing and hearing by the Word of God. Romans 10:17. Blessings, Willa Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wayne222 Posted November 10, 2016 Group: Worthy Ministers Followers: 32 Topic Count: 475 Topics Per Day: 0.17 Content Count: 6,556 Content Per Day: 2.29 Reputation: 7,634 Days Won: 9 Joined: 06/12/2016 Status: Offline Share Posted November 10, 2016 I think the Lord does not want you to be with him. First he is not a believer. God says do not be unequally yoke with a nonbeliever. If your yoke with him he will pull you in a wrong direction. He can do no otherwise. If you really love him you would let him go his way. Because a unbeliever is better off with another unbeliever. Christians often make this mistake. God will find you a good person to love if you put God first and learn to love God first and foremost. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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