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Christs Princess

Salvation, God's leading

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Hi Everybody

 

I posted a prayer request a while back but I can't find it, it's probably staring me in the face somewhere and I've missed it.

 

My request has to do with my former boyfriend who wasa new christian but has lost his faith and now he says he will only surrender to Jesus Christ if He reveals Himself to him. He doesn't believe that the Bible is the Word of God, rather that it is a book written by man full of man's opinions and 'rules'

 

He is a Scientist and he has a very analytical mind and I think he is his own worst enemy.

This is hard for me because a ring had been bought and we were going to get married, but I can't be unequally yoked with an unbeliever. I still love him and he still loves me but unless he is truly born again things can go nowhere.


I dont know what is preventing him from  believing, he was once an atheist however he does believe in God now, or sort of, but he wants to live life his way, and does not want to be like me (apparently brainwashed and blindly obedient to God)

He sees I have a relationship with the Lord, that He answers my prayers, that He speaks to me and finds God does not speak to him, feels that He has given Him a chance to reach out to him, to speak to him and reveal himself to him and has not done so.

I really don't know what to do anymore. I've told him over and over what salvation is, what sin is, what it means to be saved. He has gone to church and heard the gospel. I had thought he had gotten to the place of being born again and so did he, but it seems he has even less faith in some ways. He also holds a lot of resentment towards God for me making a stand on not marrying an unbeliever and not going along with sex before marriage. The thing is I didnt really do the breaking up, it was more  a point of me not budging on my stand and him saying he won't accept a sexless relationship

If anyone has any ideas, anything you can tell me please share it with me. Please above all else pray for him! Pray earnestly for him, and for me too, to know what to do .

 

Edited by Christs Princess

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Guest Robert
13 minutes ago, Christs Princess said:

Hi Everybody

 

I posted a prayer request a while back but I can't find it, it's probably staring me in the face somewhere and I've missed it.

 

My request has to do with my former boyfriend who wasa new christian but has lost his faith and now he says he will only surrender to Jesus Christ if He reveals Himself to him. He doesn't believe that the Bible is the Word of God, rather that it is a book written by man full of man's opinions and 'rules'

 

He is a Scientist and he has a very analytical mind and I think he is his own worst enemy.

This is hard for me because a ring had been bought and we were going to get married, but I can't be unequally yoked with an unbeliever. I still love him and he still loves me but unless he is truly born again things can go nowhere.


I dont know what is preventing him from  believing, he was once an atheist however he does believe in God now, or sort of, but he wants to live life his way, and does not want to be like me (apparently brainwashed and blindly obedient to God)

He sees I have a relationship with the Lord, that He answers my prayers, that He speaks to me and finds God does not speak to him, feels that He has given Him a chance to reach out to him, to speak to him and reveal himself to him and has not done so.

I really don't know what to do anymore. I've told him over and over what salvation is, what sin is, what it means to be saved. He has gone to church and heard the gospel. I had thought he had gotten to the place of being born again and so did he, but it seems he has even less faith in some ways. He also holds a lot of resentment towards God for me making a stand on not marrying an unbeliever and not going along with sex before marriage. The thing is I didnt really do the breaking up, it was more  a point of me not budging on my stand and him saying he won't accept a sexless relationship

If anyone has any ideas, anything you can tell me please share it with me. Please above all else pray for him! Pray earnestly for him, and for me too, to know what to do .

 

 

Christs Princess,

I know what your ex-fiancee/boyfriend did to you hurt a lot; sometimes when we have to stand for what is Scriptural and right, it can cost us and yes: it can hurt. That said, the issue here with his salvation isn't "head knowledge" but "heart knowledge", and someone can know a lot about Scripture and be told repeatedly how to repent and be saved. But unless they see the fact that they sinned against the Lord and want to turn away from sin, they aren't going to accept it in their heart. What bothers me here about this is his insistence on a relationship with sex in it: while marriage is safe for that, anything outside of that is a world of trouble. That tells me he's more committed to living his own way and not God's and that is troubling. Even more so, he doesn't seem to respect your faith or your desire to serve the Lord and follow what Scripture says. And if he's like this now, anything in a relationship/ marriage is only going to intensify as time goes on.

You did the right thing sis; I'm just so sorry it caused you so much grief and hurt. :(

In light of all of this, I will definitely pray for his salvation, as I will also pray for you as well. But I do urge you to seriously consider both his words and his actions towards you: he doesn't sound like he cares much for anything other than what he desires and wants.

 

YBIC,

-Robert

Edited by Robert

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hummm...

2 hours ago, Christs Princess said:

I had thought he had gotten to the place of being born again and so did he,

did he give his heart to the Lord sincerly?how long ago was it?  Did you ask him What the Holy Sprit was like? i kind of need to ask more Questions to try and figure out Whats going on...So i am hesitant to say much...But if i just go with What you wrote it seems to me his Fruit is not looking to good...But then again i cant really say that without knowing more...But from what you said he seems like he would not be good for you at this time...I wouldnt want  to see you brought down from him...I would say Keep your stance and tell him he needs to get it togeher or its not gonna work.You can do all things Though... Praying now

Edited by shanee

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Praying~!

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First, let me appreciate you for being sensitive to your faith. I'm so sorry you are going through this, but the scriptural teaching on the subject seems clear in urging believers to avoid marrying non-believers (2 Corinthians 6:14-15). Under God, marriage is a lifelong commitment, and it is vital that the person to whom you are closest and most committed shares the same basic value system you do.  I'm praying that God will give clear direction as you turn to Him. Praying for your ex-boyfriend's salvation, too.

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On 11/1/2016 at 10:21 PM, Christs Princess said:

If anyone has any ideas, anything you can tell me please share it with me. Please above all else pray for him! Pray earnestly for him, and for me too, to know what to do .

Your commitment to God first is such a great thing, stand firm in that and trust Him!

If this guy's qualms are really about analytical evidence, I'd suggest The Case for Christ by Lee Strobel, and Evidence That Demands a Verdict by Josh McDowell. Also, Doug Powell has a great series on apologetics on Youtube, everything from Jesus' resurrection to Biblical reliability to the evidence we have from astronomy.

Praying, God bless!

Edited by OneLight
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Robert, thank you so much for your kind response. I think you have really hit the nail on the head. He wants to do things his way even in approaching the Lord. He has a lot of pride and unbelief. He has so many good traits but his pride is his downfall. He is someone who will do the opposite of what he's told just to be otherwise.

 

He called me tonight and we went for a drive, we avoided the 'heavy' topics. just chatted and caught up with each others lives etc.
He is a very  easy going person, a typical 'nerd' type very intelligent and has a quite even temperament.  Sometimes I look at him and don't understand how he can be so stubborn and yet so easy going. I have to say its extremely difficult meeting with him as friends when its clear we do love each other but we are on different sides of the fence at the moment. And will that ever change? How long do I 'wait and see?'

He is a very kind person, doesn't have a temper, and has been very good to me. It makes me so sad that things have turned out like they have.

Edited by Christs Princess

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6 hours ago, shanee said:

hummm...

did he give his heart to the Lord sincerly?how long ago was it?  Did you ask him What the Holy Sprit was like? i kind of need to ask more Questions to try and figure out Whats going on...So i am hesitant to say much...But if i just go with What you wrote it seems to me his Fruit is not looking to good...But then again i cant really say that without knowing more...But from what you said he seems like he would not be good for you at this time...I wouldnt want  to see you brought down from him...I would say Keep your stance and tell him he needs to get it togeher or its not gonna work.You can do all things Though... Praying now

Hi Shane I have just learned now how to quote a post.

When I met him he was an atheist and i was backslidden so we were not living right, either one of us. I came back to the Lord after 2 yrs and we ended the relationship. 6 months later he appeared to sincerely want to give his heart to the Lord and he is not one to fake anything or deceive. In my opinion i think perhaps he thought he was born again and tried to live as a christian but perhaps he never was born again.
It has just been in recent months that after he bought a ring and was going to propose that he re thunk things....he said he had "tried christanity" and that God hasn't shown Himself to be real to him, he doesnt 'feel' different, and began to despise the new sexless relationship despite it being that way for the past year. (Once I came back to the Lord I truly repented and stuck to my guns)
Why it took a year, i dont know, maybe its because he re examined what he really believes and decided he doesn't really believe and wanted to be honest with me. either way I am glad he was and didn't just 'go along' and lie to me.

Thank you for your prayers  I met up with him tonight and we went for a drive, didn't discuss anything heavy just talked as friends but it is obvious he still loves me and he says he misses me...i feel the same but what can I do? I can't re-enter the relationship unless he is transformed by the Holy Spirit.

 

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