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Christmas and Divorce


Sean Carter

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Hi All! Asking for a friend. Thanks for reading:

I am undergoing a divorce preceding with my ex and have a question. We have a young child together who is 3 years old. The mother, who is Catholic, insists on having all Christmas’ with the child until she turns 18. While I don’t identify with any particular religion or faith, I am a very spiritual person and do celebrate Christmas. I know that Jesus’ teachings would advocate for an equal alternating distribution of Christmas Holidays between both parents but I’m not familiar enough with the scripture to be able to cite passages that would support such an even split. Could someone please point me to scripture passages that are mentioned?

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38 minutes ago, Sean Carter said:

Hi All! Asking for a friend. Thanks for reading:

I am undergoing a divorce preceding with my ex and have a question. We have a young child together who is 3 years old. The mother, who is Catholic, insists on having all Christmas’ with the child until she turns 18. While I don’t identify with any particular religion or faith, I am a very spiritual person and do celebrate Christmas. I know that Jesus’ teachings would advocate for an equal alternating distribution of Christmas Holidays between both parents but I’m not familiar enough with the scripture to be able to cite passages that would support such an even split. Could someone please point me to scripture passages that are mentioned?

I do not know the whole picture so it is impossible for me to make any judgments here. You have an attorney who is helping you with this divorce? Why don't you bring this before your attorney and ask for every other Christmas with your child? I do not know of any Bible verses that point to the fact that a parent should have a child every other Christmas holiday.

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37 minutes ago, Sean Carter said:

Could someone please point me to scripture passages that are mentioned?

While there is no specific Scripture to apply to this situation, there are many Scriptures which plainly state that God demands JUSTICE and MERCY in human affairs. That principle should clearly apply in your situation, since shutting you out from your child unfairly violates both justice and mercy.

That which is altogether just shalt thou follow, that thou mayest live, and inherit the land which the LORD thy God giveth thee. (Deuteronomy 16:20).

But if ye had known what this meaneth, I will have mercy, and not sacrifice, ye would not have condemned the guiltless. (Matthew 12:7).

Therefore turn thou to thy God: keep mercy and judgment [justice], and wait on thy God continually. (Hosea 12:6).

He hath shewed thee, O man, what is good; and what doth the LORD require of thee, but to do justly, and to love mercy, and to walk humbly with thy God? (Micah 6:8).

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1 hour ago, Sean Carter said:

Hi All! Asking for a friend. Thanks for reading:

I am undergoing a divorce preceding with my ex and have a question. We have a young child together who is 3 years old. The mother, who is Catholic, insists on having all Christmas’ with the child until she turns 18. While I don’t identify with any particular religion or faith, I am a very spiritual person and do celebrate Christmas. I know that Jesus’ teachings would advocate for an equal alternating distribution of Christmas Holidays between both parents but I’m not familiar enough with the scripture to be able to cite passages that would support such an even split. Could someone please point me to scripture passages that are mentioned?

Welcome~!

~

Praying~!

But you say, “Why does he not?” Because the LORD was witness between you and the wife of your youth, to whom you have been faithless, though she is your companion and your wife by covenant. Did he not make them one, with a portion of the Spirit in their union? And what was the one God seeking? Godly offspring. So guard yourselves in your spirit, and let none of you be faithless to the wife of your youth. Malachi 2:14-15 ( English Standard Version)

Show Her This Scripture With Tender Love
And Wait And See If God Will Move Her Heart

Do Know Your Daughter Will Surely Seek You Out After Her Eighteenth Birthday
So Pray To The LORD To Keep Your Spirit Sweet So Christ Will Be Exulted In Your Fellowship

~

While several countries are getting ready to return to work after New Year parties, celebrations are just beginning in others. Orthodox Christian communities, including Greek Catholics and Coptic Christians, around the world are preparing for Christmas, which they celebrate on Jan. 7, nearly two weeks after the Dec. 25 festivities.

Christmas is observed on Jan. 7 by 15 different Eastern Orthodox churches. Nearly 39 percent of the total number of Orthodox Christians in the world live in Russia and around 85 percent of them choose to celebrate Christmas in January. http://www.ibtimes.com/when-orthodox-christmas-russia-ukraine-serbia-ethiopia-prepare-jan-7-celebrations-2467935

~

Be Blessed Beloved Of The KING

The LORD bless thee, and keep thee:
The LORD make his face shine upon thee, and be gracious unto thee:
The LORD lift up his countenance upon thee, and give thee peace.

And they shall put my name upon the children of Israel; and I will bless them. Numbers 6:24-27 (King James Bible)

Love, Your Brother Joe

~

Thy word is true from the beginning: and every one of thy righteous judgments endureth for ever. Psalms 119:160 (King James Bible)

The Bible contains the mind of God, the state of man, the way of salvation, the doom of sinners, and the happiness of believers. Its doctrines are holy, its precepts are binding, its histories are true, and its decisions are immutable.

Read it to be wise, believe it to be safe, and practice it to be holy. It contains light to direct you, food to support you, and comfort to cheer you.

It is the traveler’s map, the pilgrim’s staff, the pilot’s compass, the soldier’s sword and the Christian’s charter. Here too, Heaven is opened and the gates of Hell disclosed.

Christ is its grand subject, our good its design, and the glory of God its end. It should fill the memory, rule the heart and guide the feet. Read it slowly, frequently and prayerfully.  It is a mine of wealth, a paradise of glory, and a river of pleasure.

It is given you in life, will be opened at the judgment, and be remembered forever. It involves the highest responsibility, rewards the greatest labor, and will condemn all who trifle with its sacred contents.

From The Inside Of My Gideon New Testament

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I don't understand what you consider to be spiritual.  

Have you turned away from your imperfections and sins and asked God to forgive you?  That is the first step to becoming spiritual in a good way.  

Do you read the Bible daily, especially the New Testament?  This is the second step to becoming spiritual in a good way.  

Do you Pray to God through Jesus Christ every day?  This is the third step to becoming spiritual in a good way.  It is having a personal relationship with the Living God in which you know Him well and know His thoughts.

All you have to do is believe that God loves you and sent Jesus to suffer and die for your sins.  

Joh 3:16 NKJV For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life. Joh 3:17  For God did not send His Son into the world to condemn the world, but that the world through Him might be saved.  Joh 3:18  "He who believes in Him is not condemned; but he who does not believe is condemned already, because he has not believed in the name of the only begotten Son of God.

Until you receive the Spirit of Jesus into your life, you really will not be celebrating the true meaning of His birth on Christmas and probably should not have her in your home for the holy days like Thanksgiving and Easter either..  You will not be able to teach her the true meaning of Christmas.  Santa Clause, tinsel and trees don't have much to do with Christmas.  They are pagan legends.  Thanksgiving is about giving thanks to God for His blessings, provision and help and not about food.  Easter is about the Passover Lamb being sacrificed so that eternal death bypasses you, and how Jesus became the true Lamb of God Who takes away the sins of the world when He died in your place.  It has nothing to do with pagan easter eggs and candy rabbits.  It is about being born again to a new life in Christ and dying to selfishness.  

So my advice would be to take her on the 4th of July, Memorial Day, Labor day, New Year's Eve and day,  Martin Luther King's birthday, Valentines day, Veterans day, and spring break--any pagan holiday you choose until such time as you come to trust in and adhere to the Person of Jesus Christ.  Then you will come to understand what the true meaning of each holy day is and won't teach your daughter to just celebrate them like a heathen.

Praying for God to bless you richly and comfort you,

Willa                                                                                                                                                                                                  

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22 hours ago, Sean Carter said:

Hi All! Asking for a friend. Thanks for reading:

I am undergoing a divorce preceding with my ex and have a question. We have a young child together who is 3 years old. The mother, who is Catholic, insists on having all Christmas’ with the child until she turns 18. While I don’t identify with any particular religion or faith, I am a very spiritual person and do celebrate Christmas. I know that Jesus’ teachings would advocate for an equal alternating distribution of Christmas Holidays between both parents but I’m not familiar enough with the scripture to be able to cite passages that would support such an even split. Could someone please point me to scripture passages that are mentioned?

I could point you to several scriptures talking about the evils of divorce, but Christmas wasn't a thing until hundreds of years after the Bible was written, and divorce was largely not a thing in those times, either.

Instead, I would suggest marriage counseling.

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If your wife is a devout Catholic a good verse to share would be-

Mark 10:9Authorized (King James) Version (AKJV)

What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder.

God isn't pleased with divorce--- make every effort to work it out for the child's sake-- divorce is always a product of selfishness--- people have to give of themselves to make it work---

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23 hours ago, Willa said:

I don't understand what you consider to be spiritual.  

Have you turned away from your imperfections and sins and asked God to forgive you?  That is the first step to becoming spiritual in a good way.  

Do you read the Bible daily, especially the New Testament?  This is the second step to becoming spiritual in a good way.  

Do you Pray to God through Jesus Christ every day?  This is the third step to becoming spiritual in a good way.  It is having a personal relationship with the Living God in which you know Him well and know His thoughts.

All you have to do is believe that God loves you and sent Jesus to suffer and die for your sins.  

Joh 3:16 NKJV For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life. Joh 3:17  For God did not send His Son into the world to condemn the world, but that the world through Him might be saved.  Joh 3:18  "He who believes in Him is not condemned; but he who does not believe is condemned already, because he has not believed in the name of the only begotten Son of God.

Until you receive the Spirit of Jesus into your life, you really will not be celebrating the true meaning of His birth on Christmas and probably should not have her in your home for the holy days like Thanksgiving and Easter either..  You will not be able to teach her the true meaning of Christmas.  Santa Clause, tinsel and trees don't have much to do with Christmas.  They are pagan legends.  Thanksgiving is about giving thanks to God for His blessings, provision and help and not about food.  Easter is about the Passover Lamb being sacrificed so that eternal death bypasses you, and how Jesus became the true Lamb of God Who takes away the sins of the world when He died in your place.  It has nothing to do with pagan easter eggs and candy rabbits.  It is about being born again to a new life in Christ and dying to selfishness.  

So my advice would be to take her on the 4th of July, Memorial Day, Labor day, New Year's Eve and day,  Martin Luther King's birthday, Valentines day, Veterans day, and spring break--any pagan holiday you choose until such time as you come to trust in and adhere to the Person of Jesus Christ.  Then you will come to understand what the true meaning of each holy day is and won't teach your daughter to just celebrate them like a heathen.

Praying for God to bless you richly and comfort you,

Willa                                                                                                                                                                                                  

This is an absolutely terrible response to the OP's issue and to summarize it with praying that God bless you richly and comfort you is an insult.    This person is the parent of that child, just as the mother is the parent.   Unfortunately their union is no more.  That does not mean that child does not get to spend time with a parent on a certain holiday.  If anyone should follow the steps you outlined it should be you.  This was an insulting post in my opinion and does not even address the issue.  

@Sean Carter There are no direct scriptures on custody matters.  I would say take the advice of @missmuffet.  Speak to your lawyer if you have one or to the family court judge about this situation.  You should be able to enjoy the holiday with your child. 

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22 hours ago, ruck1b said:

@Sean Carter There are no direct scriptures on custody matters.  I would say take the advice of @missmuffet.  Speak to your lawyer if you have one or to the family court judge about this situation.  You should be able to enjoy the holiday with your child

Missmuffet was addressing the cause of the divorce---  wouldn't it be better to avoid or retract a divorce than to put a child through all the pain and chaos of parents fighting for their rights at the child's expense??

You said " enjoy the holiday with your child"- how do you supposed the poor child feels when mom and dad are in court??? Do you think the child will enjoy the holiday???

in my opinion your response to her was needlessly harsh, and only looked at the surface issue

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On ‎1‎/‎4‎/‎2017 at 0:03 PM, ruck1b said:

This is an absolutely terrible response to the OP's issue and to summarize it with praying that God bless you richly and comfort you is an insult.    This person is the parent of that child, just as the mother is the parent.   Unfortunately their union is no more.  That does not mean that child does not get to spend time with a parent on a certain holiday.  If anyone should follow the steps you outlined it should be you.  This was an insulting post in my opinion and does not even address the issue.  

@Sean Carter There are no direct scriptures on custody matters.  I would say take the advice of @missmuffet.  Speak to your lawyer if you have one or to the family court judge about this situation.  You should be able to enjoy the holiday with your child. 

 

13 hours ago, woundeddog said:

Missmuffet was addressing the cause of the divorce---  wouldn't it be better to avoid or retract a divorce than to put a child through all the pain and chaos of parents fighting for their rights at the child's expense??

You said " enjoy the holiday with your child"- how do you supposed the poor child feels when mom and dad are in court??? Do you think the child will enjoy the holiday???

in my opinion your response to her was needlessly harsh, and only looked at the surface issue

Evidently I misread the post- my post was defending Willas response-- I misread the quote asmismuffets-- I apologize, but my response remains the same with the exception of who I was talking about-- sorry for the confusion

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