Wrong to speak against a "man of God?"

[Pie]

Hello, I wanted to know about scriptures pertaining to this. I know there are plenty speaking against false teachers and prophets. My problem is there is a certain  “healing evangelist” who married into my family. He has caused quite a bit of division in the family. He is one of the most narcissistic people I have ever known. He doesn’t even try to hide it. And he only ever talks about churches in terms of money. “This one gets about $500 a week. This one is $1,000 a week.” (That’s not an exaggeration. ) He is very judgmental of some of my family which is why the division has happened. I could go on and on. The members of my family who are struggling and somewhat skeptical of Christianity, become even more skeptical because of people like him, which is frustrating. But what bothers me most is he has nearly died refusing to go to the doctor due to the fact it shows “lack of faith” and he’s the healing evangelist after all. He’s married to a very close family member, who I adore and who is older and tries to convince her not to go to the doctor when she is sick. He makes her feel guilty like she isn’t trusting God, and this obviously makes me incredibly angry because now he could potentially hurt her. This has happened a few times recently, others have been able to convince her to go to the doctor anyways. However, anytime I speak out against him, my mother says to be careful because the Bible says you should not speak against a man of God. My argument is that he isn’t a man of God.

 Her reasoning is that he isn’t aware of the way he is. Which after thoughtful consideration, I don’t think he does realize what he is doing is wrong. But would anyone full of pride who turned church into a money-making business see it as wrong? Wouldn’t they all justify it in their hearts somehow? I seriously doubt they go to church everyday saying, “I know this is wrong and I don’t care.” So, is that an excuse for their behavior? And is it a serious offense to “speak against them?” I know I have some bitterness towards him that I need to deal with but it’s because I don’t want him to hurt anyone. And I can't just let it go. I would try talking to him but he won't listen to anyone. If a pastor even tries to disagree with him, he refuses to go back to that church. The guy is not open to feedback at all. 

Edit: Maybe I should have posted this under, "Have a problem? Looking for Advice?"

Edited February 27, 2017 by Pie

[The_Patriot21]

Speaking out against a man of God is largely dependent on whether the person is, or is not, a man of God, first off. Second, the Bible also says that if a brother sins against you you are to hold him accountable.

To handle it Biblically, you need to confront him in private (in a loving manner of course) about it, bringing scripture. I would include his wife in this conversation just so she knows your not sneaking around her back or at least let her in on it. If he will not see the error of his ways, then the Bible says to bring a elder or someone with you to confront him.  I would try to find someone who is a strong Christians who shares your view and you both have a mutual respect for.

Now granted these are more geared towards the church, but they can be applied to a family unit. If the first two steps don't get the results the third is to bring it to the entire church. Since this is a family affair, I would have a family meeting. 

 

If these steps don't work or arnt feasible in your situation (they may not be) I think the best thing you can do is pray for him, but keep encouraging his wife to see the doctor, as well as him and pray for openings when you can share the truth with Him, and wait patiently for the Lord to do His work.

[enoob57]

Matthew 15:11 (KJV)

[11] Not that which goeth into the mouth defileth a man; but that which cometh out of the mouth, this defileth a man.

1 John 2:15 (KJV)

[15] Love not the world, neither the things that are in the world. If any man love the world, the love of the Father is not in him.

God in His Grace is able to deliver but we shall know them

Matthew 7:16 (KJV)

[16] Ye shall know them by their fruits. Do men gather grapes of thorns, or figs of thistles?

[17] Even so every good tree bringeth forth good fruit; but a corrupt tree bringeth forth evil fruit.

[18] A good tree cannot bring forth evil fruit, neither can a corrupt tree bring forth good fruit.

[19] Every tree that bringeth not forth good fruit is hewn down, and cast into the fire.

[20] Wherefore by their fruits ye shall know them.

Love, Steven

[Wayne222]

I think everyone is a man or woman of God if they are born again. If your a servant of God you are a man of God. But anyway God says speak not evil of anyone. That's even unbelievers .

[missmuffet]

1 hour ago, Pie said:

Hello, I wanted to know about scriptures pertaining to this. I know there are plenty speaking against false teachers and prophets. My problem is there is a certain  “healing evangelist” who married into my family. He has caused quite a bit of division in the family. He is one of the most narcissistic people I have ever known. He doesn’t even try to hide it. And he only ever talks about churches in terms of money. “This one gets about $500 a week. This one is $1,000 a week.” (That’s not an exaggeration. ) He is very judgmental of some of my family which is why the division has happened. I could go on and on. The members of my family who are struggling and somewhat skeptical of Christianity, become even more skeptical because of people like him, which is frustrating. But what bothers me most is he has nearly died refusing to go to the doctor due to the fact it shows “lack of faith” and he’s the healing evangelist after all. He’s married to a very close family member, who I adore and who is older and tries to convince her not to go to the doctor when she is sick. He makes her feel guilty like she isn’t trusting God, and this obviously makes me incredibly angry because now he could potentially hurt her. This has happened a few times recently, others have been able to convince her to go to the doctor anyways. However, anytime I speak out against him, my mother says to be careful because the Bible says you should not speak against a man of God. My argument is that he isn’t a man of God.

 Her reasoning is that he isn’t aware of the way he is. Which after thoughtful consideration, I don’t think he does realize what he is doing is wrong. But would anyone full of pride who turned church into a money-making business see it as wrong? Wouldn’t they all justify it in their hearts somehow? I seriously doubt they go to church everyday saying, “I know this is wrong and I don’t care.” So, is that an excuse for their behavior? And is it a serious offense to “speak against them?” I know I have some bitterness towards him that I need to deal with but it’s because I don’t want him to hurt anyone. And I can't just let it go. I would try talking to him but he won't listen to anyone. If a pastor even tries to disagree with him, he refuses to go back to that church. The guy is not open to feedback at all. 

Edit: Maybe I should have posted this under, "Have a problem? Looking for Advice?"

Is he Charismatic and a WOF teacher? If this person is not preaching the true literal word of God his teachings need to be ignored. Perhaps you could pray for him because if he is a false teacher he is in a lot of trouble in the eyes of God.

[The_Patriot21]

14 minutes ago, Wayne222 said:

I think everyone is a man or woman of God if they are born again. If your a servant of God you are a man of God. But anyway God says speak not evil of anyone. That's even unbelievers .

Right, but trying to correct someone of an error in their ways is not speaking evil of them.

[Pie]

16 minutes ago, Wayne222 said:

I think everyone is a man or woman of God if they are born again. If your a servant of God you are a man of God. But anyway God says speak not evil of anyone. That's even unbelievers .

Interesting perspective. Do you mean we should never ever should speak out against anyone? I realize all Christians falter at times but if they are leaders and consistently, for years, following greed and pride, it seems to me, its more loving to correct them. At the same time, if I'm just venting about him and it's not accomplishing anything, then I may be the one in the wrong. So perhaps my mother is right in that regard. 

I guess I'm mostly thinking of James where it talks about controlling the tongue. 
 

James 3: 1-12 "Not many of you should become teachers, my brothers, for you know that we who teach will be judged with greater strictness.  For we all stumble in many ways. And if anyone does not stumble in what he says, he is a perfect man, able also to bridle his whole body. If we put bits into the mouths of horses so that they obey us, we guide their whole bodies as well.  Look at the ships also: though they are so large and are driven by strong winds, they are guided by a very small rudder wherever the will of the pilot directs. So also the tongue is a small member, yet it boasts of great things.

How great a forest is set ablaze by such a small fire! And the tongue is a fire, a world of unrighteousness. The tongue is set among our members, staining the whole body, setting on fire the entire course of life, and set on fire by hell. For every kind of beast and bird, of reptile and sea creature, can be tamed and has been tamed by mankind, but no human being can tame the tongue. It is a restless evil, full of deadly poison. With it we bless our Lord and Father, and with it we curse people who are made in the likeness of God.  From the same mouth come blessing and cursing. My brothers, these things ought not to be so.  Does a spring pour forth from the same opening both fresh and salt water?  Can a fig tree, my brothers, bear olives, or a grapevine produce figs? Neither can a salt pond yield fresh water."

It seems like this scripture could pertain to both me and him. I know I need to get a handle on my temper when it comes to him. Like Patriot mentioned, if it's to correct, then it's a different situation. 

5 minutes ago, missmuffet said:

Is he Charismatic and a WOF teacher? If this person is not preaching the true literal word of God his teachings need to be ignored. Perhaps you could pray for him because if he is a false teacher he is in a lot of trouble in the eyes of God.

 

What does WOF stand for? I googled it and found Word of Faith? Is that right? He definitely believes you need to have enough faith to get healed. He would probably classify himself as Charismatic. 

[missmuffet]

14 minutes ago, Pie said:

Interesting perspective. Do you mean we should never ever should speak out against anyone? I realize all Christians falter at times but if they are leaders and consistently, for years, following greed and pride, it seems to me, its more loving to correct them. At the same time, if I'm just venting about him and it's not accomplishing anything, then I may be the one in the wrong. So perhaps my mother is right in that regard. 

I guess I'm mostly thinking of James where it talks about controlling the tongue. 
 

James 3: 1-12 "Not many of you should become teachers, my brothers, for you know that we who teach will be judged with greater strictness.  For we all stumble in many ways. And if anyone does not stumble in what he says, he is a perfect man, able also to bridle his whole body. If we put bits into the mouths of horses so that they obey us, we guide their whole bodies as well.  Look at the ships also: though they are so large and are driven by strong winds, they are guided by a very small rudder wherever the will of the pilot directs. So also the tongue is a small member, yet it boasts of great things.

How great a forest is set ablaze by such a small fire! And the tongue is a fire, a world of unrighteousness. The tongue is set among our members, staining the whole body, setting on fire the entire course of life, and set on fire by hell. For every kind of beast and bird, of reptile and sea creature, can be tamed and has been tamed by mankind, but no human being can tame the tongue. It is a restless evil, full of deadly poison. With it we bless our Lord and Father, and with it we curse people who are made in the likeness of God.  From the same mouth come blessing and cursing. My brothers, these things ought not to be so.  Does a spring pour forth from the same opening both fresh and salt water?  Can a fig tree, my brothers, bear olives, or a grapevine produce figs? Neither can a salt pond yield fresh water."

It seems like this scripture could pertain to both me and him. I know I need to get a handle on my temper when it comes to him. Like Patriot mentioned, if it's to correct, then it's a different situation. 

What does WOF stand for? I googled it and found Word of Faith? Is that right? He definitely believes you need to have enough faith to get healed. He would probably classify himself as Charismatic. 

WOF is a Word of Faith teacher and it is a movement which is very unbiblical. You can read about it here https://www.gotquestions.org/Word-Faith.html.

I would present the truth to him for whatever words of God he is preaching that is not biblical. Being angry is not going to help and it would not produce any fruit of the Holy Spirit. I would just follow this Scripture regarding this person and have very little contact with him

Mark 6:11 And whoever will not receive you nor hear you, when you depart from there, shake off the dust under your feet as a testimony against them. Assuredly, I say to you, it will be more tolerable for Sodom and Gomorrah in the day of judgment than for that city!”

[Pie]

3 minutes ago, missmuffet said:

Being angry is not going to help and it would not produce any fruit of the Holy Spirit. I would just follow this Scripture regarding this person and have very little contact with him

 

 

Thank you! That website describes almost exactly what he preaches. Nearly verbatim in some parts. Very enlightening.

You're right. Being angry doesn't accomplish anything and doesn't produce good fruit. And that is why I know my own bitterness just hinders my own relationship with God. And I need to seek forgiveness for harboring it.  Most of my family has already limited their contact with him. But since he is married to someone in our family whom we all adore (she has a heart of gold but is extremely naive and impressionable), cutting him out completely just isn't an option (or we all would have by now). We get concerned about her especially when she gets sick. She has to hide the fact she's going to specialists from him. Which is ridiculous. He nearly died until one of my family members (whom he judged and spoke against) actually offered to pay for his surgery and did pay for it. The surgeon said had he waited even a couple of more days, he would have died.  Yet, he still condemns her for seeing doctors because it makes him look bad as a "healing evangelist." So we have to be involved. 

[missmuffet]

10 minutes ago, Pie said:

Thank you! That website describes almost exactly what he preaches. Nearly verbatim in some parts. Very enlightening.

You're right. Being angry doesn't accomplish anything and doesn't produce good fruit. And that is why I know my own bitterness just hinders my own relationship with God. And I need to seek forgiveness for harboring it.  Most of my family has already limited their contact with him. But since he is married to someone in our family whom we all adore (she has a heart of gold but is extremely naive and impressionable), cutting him out completely just isn't an option (or we all would have by now). We get concerned about her especially when she gets sick. She has to hide the fact she's going to specialists from him. Which is ridiculous. He nearly died until one of my family members (whom he judged and spoke against) actually offered to pay for his surgery and did pay for it. The surgeon said had he waited even a couple of more days, he would have died.  Yet, he still condemns her for seeing doctors because it makes him look bad as a "healing evangelist." So we have to be involved. 

Then you might want to stay away from what he preaches. I am glad you recognized the false teaching for what it is.