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Wheezie

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Hello. I have a friend who got into drugs and basically abandoned her two girls and left her husband for another guy half her age. They are supposedly clean and she just found out that she is pregnant. (mind you she has chosen this guy over her daughters as he can not come back to this area where they are). Her comment is she feels its God's will because she already has so many health problems and only a 5% chance of getting pregnant ... I disagree. So I have been avoiding her because Im not sure what to say to her and I dont think it would be right to 'congratulate' her. But I also know that life is precious no matter the circumstance ... what would you say to her?

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4 hours ago, Wheezie said:

what would you say to her....

:thumbsup:

Welcome~!

:)

But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you. Matthew 6:3

~

Praying~!

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Blessings Wheezie

   Welcome to Worthy.....glad you are here.I don't know your friend & only because of what you said I do know she does believe there is a God,is she a Christian? Are you a Christian?I don't know anything about how it all came about so I can't just make assumptions.....You said she left her husband for this younger guy(& abandoned her 2 girls) Is that how it looks to you or is that what she has told you?How close of a "friend" is she to you?

    Well,sounds like she feeds the desires of her flesh .... I would be more concerned about her Eternal Life  before anything else .....With love-in Christ,Kwik

    

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17 hours ago, Wheezie said:

Hello. I have a friend who got into drugs and basically abandoned her two girls and left her husband for another guy half her age. They are supposedly clean and she just found out that she is pregnant. (mind you she has chosen this guy over her daughters as he can not come back to this area where they are). Her comment is she feels its God's will because she already has so many health problems and only a 5% chance of getting pregnant ... I disagree. So I have been avoiding her because Im not sure what to say to her and I dont think it would be right to 'congratulate' her. But I also know that life is precious no matter the circumstance ... what would you say to her?

No, it is not God's will. The woman is making ungodly poor choices. I think the best thing you can do for her is to pray for her.

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There seems to be some information missing here.  I wonder how, if she is not permitted to return to the area, then why is she able to see you in the same area?   What do you mean by "supposedly clean"?  Can you clear this up for us?

You did say that you "have" a friend, not "had", so your concern is genuine.  It is good that you did not write her off.  There is a good chance that you may still have some influence in helping her make better choices.  Your living a life of example will go a long way (and maybe already has) towards drawing her to seeking answers.  Just remember, you friendship with her does not have to include approval or even acceptance of bad actions.

Others will have more to say in here at Worthy, and thank you for trusting us for assistance.   God Bless you Wheezie

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23 hours ago, Wheezie said:

Hello. I have a friend who got into drugs and basically abandoned her two girls and left her husband for another guy half her age. They are supposedly clean and she just found out that she is pregnant. (mind you she has chosen this guy over her daughters as he can not come back to this area where they are). Her comment is she feels its God's will because she already has so many health problems and only a 5% chance of getting pregnant ... I disagree. So I have been avoiding her because Im not sure what to say to her and I dont think it would be right to 'congratulate' her. But I also know that life is precious no matter the circumstance ... what would you say to her?

4

To have a great future she must think of her daughters and see how she make it up to them. No matter what it may be they are her fist blood you cannot just wake up and abandon the kids you have raised to a stage and follow another guy. I think she needs counselling and prayers to bring her back to her real sense there is nothing God cannot do. I believe the guy she is with is also into drug maybe that is why she can get along with him please send her books is she will be willing to read them they might also help. Romans 1:28 says for they regard not God in their knowledge so He gave them a reprobate mind to d those things that are not convenient 

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Pray for her daily, for starters. I wouldn't advise you to avoid her; she needs a strong Christian influence now more than ever. But I wouldn't congratulate her on the fruits of her sin either. It's a fine line between still loving her and approving of her actions.

"6 But from the beginning of creation, ‘God made them male and female.’ 7 ‘Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife,[a] 8 and the two shall become one flesh.’ So they are no longer two but one flesh. 9 What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate." -- Mark 10:6-9

You should make it clear that it is definitely not God's will. I might also consult the pastor of your church and find out if they offer any counseling services for people like that, struggling in marriage and with infidelity etc.

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17 hours ago, kwikphilly said:

Blessings Wheezie

   Welcome to Worthy.....glad you are here.I don't know your friend & only because of what you said I do know she does believe there is a God,is she a Christian? Are you a Christian?I don't know anything about how it all came about so I can't just make assumptions.....You said she left her husband for this younger guy(& abandoned her 2 girls) Is that how it looks to you or is that what she has told you?How close of a "friend" is she to you?

    Well,sounds like she feeds the desires of her flesh .... I would be more concerned about her Eternal Life  before anything else .....With love-in Christ,Kwik

    

This girl was my bff in grade school ... through highschool we didnt stay close but I was always there for her when life was down and she was the same for me ... I practically lived at her house on the weekends growing up :) Love her mom like my own mom. Its not just 'how it looks' or even that she had to tell me ... she ended up in te local jail and while there I went to visit her egery weekend. When it got close for her time served we tried to get her to enroll in Teen Challenge ... of course she had excuses and she had no where else to go when she left jail ... so I let her move in with me. Anyhow, things started going haywire and next thing I know this kid is showing up at my house and then finally she took off and didnt come back ... after she got in trouble locally (she has arrest warrants out for her in two counties) her and this boy decided they needed to get clean ... so off to Florida they went ... that was October of last year. She says she went through detox and rehab and has been sober 6 months  ... but she has no accountabilty to family and the only person that can verify her sobriety is the boy who she did drugs with ... they both have jobs (?) and she doesnt have plans to move home because everything is a trigger ... but in reality the boy is in worse trouble than her and they would both probably end up arrested if they came back. Her mom and now ex husband is raising her kids ... she facetimes and texts them and I think that it seems like enough to satify her feeling like she is involved in their life (she doesnt financially take care of them in any way) ... and yes I am a Christian and pray for her ... she is reaching out to me but I just want somebody to tell me what to say ... because I dont want to be a jerk but I definitely dont want to act like Im all happy that she is pregnant and still living irresponsibly. She says she goes to church down where she is at ... but not sure what kind of church. Obviously she is living with a man she is not married to ... I just dont know what to say or how to say whatever it is to her ... I hate avoiding her ... please help :)

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You don't have to beat her over the head about it all the time, but if subjects come up, it is your duty to kindly and lovingly make it clear that she is not living as she should, that the way she is living is sinful, and damaging to her and her family, and you don't want that for her. You want only the best for her. If she rejects you after that, it will hurt, but you will have done what God commands us to do, and at that point you leave the rest up to Him.

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Blessings Wheezie

     Awww,Beloved....if you are her friend then be just that" her friend"....a friend loves their friends unconditionally & is their for them when they need love,support & most of all,Gods Truth.....if she is indeed your friend then she wouldn't Receive it better from anyone else.....What do you say? Thats easy my dear,nothing except what the Holy Spirit gives you to speak,what she needs a whole lot of is "listening" and as you "listen"....PRAY. 

   Wheezie,in all my years walking with Jesus I have never once thought about what I was going to say to someone before hand but I'm always prepared to "listen",as I am listening to a friend in need I am also listening for the promptings of the Holy Spirit,trust God,He ALWAYS has the right Words

   I'm not disagreeing with any of my Brothers & Sisters that is was probably not Gods Will for the two to be intimate & for her to Conceive outside of marriage BUT I do not ever say that it is not Gods Will when a baby is conceived.....what usually happens is that there are many reprocussions,heartache,complications as a result of the "sin"(how they went about it BUT,I cannot say I ,you or anyone else can say it is not Gods Will that this little person come into the world.....if it were not His Will then I don't think there would be life,God is the Creator of Life,Glory to God  Had these 2 been obedient they would not be looking over their shoulders & have outstanding warrants,they sound young & dumb(pardon the expression)

   Wheezie,people have had much worse beginnings than these two,Jesus can bring them FREEDOM,free from drugs,free from the burdens of guilt,regret and help them through the mess they've gotten themselves into .....you can be their voice of reason,as it stands all they have to do is run a red light,jay walk or something stupid & they will be extradited in a minute,I live in Florida & they don't play here.....you know what they need to do,if they were truly "sober" then they would turn themselves in & pay their dues ,get it over with....they've got their entire lives ahead of them to right their wrongs.....Ah,I nearly forgot the husband she left & the 2 kids......this child deserves better,maybe she may consider adoption? She needs to come to Jesus and have her heart "Convicted",sounds like you have a very very selfish friend....but we love our friends even when we despise what they do.....I do hope you will fill yourself with Gods Word & let God use you to speak to your friend,I don't know if its your Assignment but in my experience you only need be WILLING,God is ABLE                                                                       With love-in Christ,Kwik

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