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Steve_K

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The problem here is my ex wife is a pathological liar. The only reason she called me yesterday is her and her ex have hit the rocks.  She's got no intention of going back to him and I'm a "stand by replacement". She has this idea that I'm going to play those games. Which, of course, I'm not.

Reconciling in our case is impossible. She cannot be trusted to do the right thing before the Lord. I know God hates divorce and I would have done anything else if I could have. But, she left me without warning, with an apartment full of stuff, and me unable to take care of myself. I had no idea what was wrong with me, since I hadn't been diagnosed. And she went to Vegas to her ex, on my dime. Having built up money secretly from an inheritance I had gotten from my dad.

We were married for 6 1/2 years and it was constant lies on her part. She broke our marriage vows, I didn't.

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Wow.... if she hasn't changed her ways then ok. I agree. Still pray tho

58 minutes ago, Steve_ said:

The problem here is my ex wife is a pathological liar. The only reason she called me yesterday is her and her ex have hit the rocks.  She's got no intention of going back to him and I'm a "stand by replacement". She has this idea that I'm going to play those games. Which, of course, I'm not.

Reconciling in our case is impossible. She cannot be trusted to do the right thing before the Lord. I know God hates divorce and I would have done anything else if I could have. But, she left me without warning, with an apartment full of stuff, and me unable to take care of myself. I had no idea what was wrong with me, since I hadn't been diagnosed. And she went to Vegas to her ex, on my dime. Having built up money secretly from an inheritance I had gotten from my dad.

We were married for 6 1/2 years and it was constant lies on her part. She broke our marriage vows, I didn't.

 

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I'm sorry she played you like that Steve.I know how it feels. I would say have mercy and take her back but if she slept with another man while married to you I cant in right conscious advise anything else but continued separation. I pray the Lord guides and stenghthens you through this.

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On 7/7/2017 at 9:00 AM, 1x1is1 said:

Also, does ex-wife indicate that you are legally divorced?

The divorce was final in October. She was served all the correct paperwork.

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7 hours ago, Absolem said:

I'm sorry she played you like that Steve.I know how it feels. I would say have mercy and take her back but if she slept with another man while married to you I cant in right conscious advise anything else but continued separation. I pray the Lord guides and stenghthens you through this.

I know. There's no trust left. I told her that. She must have got ditched and she looks at me as a "standby"

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18 hours ago, Willa said:

It is also about forgiveness, knowing that we also are not without sins.  It is about giving time to build trust again.  Just as God is not through with Israel but will return to rule for 1000 years as her King, we should also consider reconciliation as God leads.  It is not to be considered lightly.  But if our hearts are right with God and ready to forgive, it must be at least something to be considered.  Sometime God says yes, and sometimes it is not.  God permitted divorce only because of the hardness of heart and hated divorce.  Yet he Himself divorced Israel.   He is not through with her but did so that we might be saved as gentiles.  

Reconciliation is impossible. I can't trust her would always be wondering which ex she was going to leave me for this time. As much as I hate divorce myself, I gotta follow through and not have her in my life.

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13 hours ago, Neighbor said:

Hi Steve,

Sorry that you have had a rough time  of marriage and divorce.

 I pray that this  attempt at reconciliation, be a catalyst toward fuller  healing  for you both. May you be granted those "better things in life" in abundance.

I offer no "advice". I don't think you are asking for any, but are instead sharing  a little of a hard time in life, with brothers and sisters. 

Cordially,

Neighbor

Healing will come, but its gonna happen with her out of my life. 

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18 hours ago, Davida said:

Ok so it is more than being unfaithful , it is also committing  abandonment, divorcing  and marrying another.

Yes it is. She stood before that alter with me and promised the Lord that she would be with me forever. As I promised her. The entire marriage all she talked about was her ex's. I felt like it was very crowded. And, according to scripture, I am free to remarry if that is God's will for me.

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31 minutes ago, Steve_ said:

I know. There's no trust left. I told her that. She must have got ditched and she looks at me as a "standby"

Its important to have self respect in that situation. Godbless ya man. Can't say I'd be strong enough to do the same.

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No offense steve. I'm not calling u a list or anything but i learned one should  never come to a conclusion in situations like this til one hear both sides tho from either spouse. I made that mistake once

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