da_man1974 Posted July 26, 2017 Group: Senior Member Followers: 25 Topic Count: 41 Topics Per Day: 0.01 Content Count: 726 Content Per Day: 0.14 Reputation: 575 Days Won: 0 Joined: 07/22/2010 Status: Offline Birthday: 12/30/1974 Share Posted July 26, 2017 Not sure if this should be posted here or in prayer requests but here it goes. Kind of confusing so try to hang in there. My wife's nieces husband (got that). He had multiple affairs. One being with the nieces step sister. Another with the nieces (former) best friend. And multiple others. So he finally came clean about it and is going to an accountability group and has been meeting with other men etc. I don't believe he is doing enough yet but that is something they are working on. But anyhow, instead of supporting the daughter her parents, grandparents, etc. are making it about them. The stepsister is getting married this month and the grandparents asked the niece what they she should say when people ask why she isn't there. She said to tell them the truth. They said oh we can't do that we will just say you are having some family issues. The parents were having easter brunch at their house. They told our niece that if she couldn't be civil to the stepsister than they would prefer that she wouldn't come. The list of this type of stuff goes on and on. So I am not sure how to support her. I have thought about sending an email to the family with my thoughts and feelings but that may not be the best idea. I told my wife this morning that I am truly at a loss of what to do. She is too. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wingnut- Posted July 26, 2017 Group: Royal Member Followers: 39 Topic Count: 101 Topics Per Day: 0.02 Content Count: 7,673 Content Per Day: 1.31 Reputation: 7,358 Days Won: 67 Joined: 04/22/2008 Status: Offline Share Posted July 26, 2017 Praying for your family. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
da_man1974 Posted July 26, 2017 Group: Senior Member Followers: 25 Topic Count: 41 Topics Per Day: 0.01 Content Count: 726 Content Per Day: 0.14 Reputation: 575 Days Won: 0 Joined: 07/22/2010 Status: Offline Birthday: 12/30/1974 Author Share Posted July 26, 2017 Thanks wingnut Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NOONE7 Posted July 27, 2017 Group: Royal Member Followers: 18 Topic Count: 21 Topics Per Day: 0.01 Content Count: 11,715 Content Per Day: 4.60 Reputation: 9,752 Days Won: 106 Joined: 04/29/2017 Status: Offline Share Posted July 27, 2017 17 hours ago, da_man1974 said: Not sure if this should be posted here or in prayer requests but here it goes. Kind of confusing so try to hang in there. My wife's nieces husband (got that). He had multiple affairs. One being with the nieces step sister. Another with the nieces (former) best friend. And multiple others. So he finally came clean about it and is going to an accountability group and has been meeting with other men etc. I don't believe he is doing enough yet but that is something they are working on. But anyhow, instead of supporting the daughter her parents, grandparents, etc. are making it about them. The stepsister is getting married this month and the grandparents asked the niece what they she should say when people ask why she isn't there. She said to tell them the truth. They said oh we can't do that we will just say you are having some family issues. The parents were having easter brunch at their house. They told our niece that if she couldn't be civil to the stepsister than they would prefer that she wouldn't come. The list of this type of stuff goes on and on. So I am not sure how to support her. I have thought about sending an email to the family with my thoughts and feelings but that may not be the best idea. I told my wife this morning that I am truly at a loss of what to do. She is too. Praying! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Annette Posted July 27, 2017 Group: Royal Member Followers: 65 Topic Count: 105 Topics Per Day: 0.04 Content Count: 3,568 Content Per Day: 1.39 Reputation: 4,029 Days Won: 7 Joined: 04/12/2017 Status: Offline Share Posted July 27, 2017 (edited) 21 hours ago, da_man1974 said: Not sure if this should be posted here or in prayer requests but here it goes. Kind of confusing so try to hang in there. My wife's nieces husband (got that). He had multiple affairs. One being with the nieces step sister. Another with the nieces (former) best friend. And multiple others. So he finally came clean about it and is going to an accountability group and has been meeting with other men etc. I don't believe he is doing enough yet but that is something they are working on. But anyhow, instead of supporting the daughter her parents, grandparents, etc. are making it about them. The stepsister is getting married this month and the grandparents asked the niece what they she should say when people ask why she isn't there. She said to tell them the truth. They said oh we can't do that we will just say you are having some family issues. The parents were having easter brunch at their house. They told our niece that if she couldn't be civil to the stepsister than they would prefer that she wouldn't come. The list of this type of stuff goes on and on. So I am not sure how to support her. I have thought about sending an email to the family with my thoughts and feelings but that may not be the best idea. I told my wife this morning that I am truly at a loss of what to do. She is too. Hey DM1974, I kept on thinking through this situation and my heart breaks for what your niece is going through. I am glad that you and your wife are there for her at this time. There have been tough moments in my life, that people have been there for me, and I am so grateful for them. And it's amazing, how at different times, God has used different people to have an impact on my life. I will be praying for your wife's niece and her husband, as well as families concerned. It is no doubt a hard time for her, as no one wants to hear the news that their spouse has been unfaithful to them. Not only is she dealing with this rejection from her husband, but from family too. It doesn't seem as if the family want to deal with the truth, but the fact remains that there is a problem. I am not sure if your wife's niece is a believer or not, if she is, that is a bonus as I would encourage her to get into the Word, share with other believers and pray about this situation. If she is not, then perhaps you and your wife can come alongside her in prayer and support and she draws that strength from you guys. Probably when you are upset, it may not be a good time to write that letter, but if you feel strongly about it, and you feel a peace about it, it may be worth contacting the family. Speaking from experience, it may not go over well, but sometimes we need to hear things that are not always easy to hear. Sometimes we have to stand up for what is right and tell the truth. I will keep you all in prayer. Blessings Edited July 27, 2017 by Annette Changed a sentence. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
enoob57 Posted July 27, 2017 Group: Worthy Ministers Followers: 35 Topic Count: 99 Topics Per Day: 0.02 Content Count: 41,058 Content Per Day: 7.97 Reputation: 21,388 Days Won: 76 Joined: 03/13/2010 Status: Offline Birthday: 07/27/1957 Share Posted July 27, 2017 Sin and the confusion that is left in it's wake cannot not be reasoned with... The only solution is the one God has shown us Hell the everlasting destruction and separation from! We will one day be separated from it and the glory of that cannot be fathomed till there. Prayed... Love, Steven Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
da_man1974 Posted July 27, 2017 Group: Senior Member Followers: 25 Topic Count: 41 Topics Per Day: 0.01 Content Count: 726 Content Per Day: 0.14 Reputation: 575 Days Won: 0 Joined: 07/22/2010 Status: Offline Birthday: 12/30/1974 Author Share Posted July 27, 2017 Thank you for your concerns and prayers. Her parent's and family claim to be christian. We even went to her mom's (my wifes sister) baptism. But they definitely do not walk the walk. I mean none of us are perfect but the way they have treated their kids..... The niece is christian. This ordeal has kind of renewed her faith. Her husband has started to grow more as well. I began emailing with him yesterday and he seems to be heading down the right path. But he realizes that he may have caused too much pain. I just don't understand the rest of the family. The mom emailed my wife yesterday and wanted to tell her to basically not believe everything that the niece said. That the story changes when you are trying to protect yourself and your husband. I just honestly cannot understand how someone can be that way. So frustrating. I even had bad dreams about the whole situation last night. UGH. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NOONE7 Posted July 27, 2017 Group: Royal Member Followers: 18 Topic Count: 21 Topics Per Day: 0.01 Content Count: 11,715 Content Per Day: 4.60 Reputation: 9,752 Days Won: 106 Joined: 04/29/2017 Status: Offline Share Posted July 27, 2017 1 hour ago, da_man1974 said: Thank you for your concerns and prayers. Her parent's and family claim to be christian. We even went to her mom's (my wifes sister) baptism. But they definitely do not walk the walk. I mean none of us are perfect but the way they have treated their kids..... The niece is christian. This ordeal has kind of renewed her faith. Her husband has started to grow more as well. I began emailing with him yesterday and he seems to be heading down the right path. But he realizes that he may have caused too much pain. I just don't understand the rest of the family. The mom emailed my wife yesterday and wanted to tell her to basically not believe everything that the niece said. That the story changes when you are trying to protect yourself and your husband. I just honestly cannot understand how someone can be that way. So frustrating. I even had bad dreams about the whole situation last night. UGH. Still praying. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
da_man1974 Posted July 27, 2017 Group: Senior Member Followers: 25 Topic Count: 41 Topics Per Day: 0.01 Content Count: 726 Content Per Day: 0.14 Reputation: 575 Days Won: 0 Joined: 07/22/2010 Status: Offline Birthday: 12/30/1974 Author Share Posted July 27, 2017 9 minutes ago, NOONE7 said: Still praying. Thanks Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shanee Posted July 27, 2017 Group: Royal Member Followers: 55 Topic Count: 109 Topics Per Day: 0.02 Content Count: 9,251 Content Per Day: 1.50 Reputation: 10,383 Days Won: 4 Joined: 06/05/2007 Status: Offline Birthday: 06/12/1974 Share Posted July 27, 2017 On 7/26/2017 at 10:42 AM, da_man1974 said: Not sure if this should be posted here or in prayer requests but here it goes. Kind of confusing so try to hang in there. My wife's nieces husband (got that). He had multiple affairs. One being with the nieces step sister. Another with the nieces (former) best friend. And multiple others. So he finally came clean about it and is going to an accountability group and has been meeting with other men etc. I don't believe he is doing enough yet but that is something they are working on. But anyhow, instead of supporting the daughter her parents, grandparents, etc. are making it about them. The stepsister is getting married this month and the grandparents asked the niece what they she should say when people ask why she isn't there. She said to tell them the truth. They said oh we can't do that we will just say you are having some family issues. The parents were having easter brunch at their house. They told our niece that if she couldn't be civil to the stepsister than they would prefer that she wouldn't come. The list of this type of stuff goes on and on. So I am not sure how to support her. I have thought about sending an email to the family with my thoughts and feelings but that may not be the best idea. I told my wife this morning that I am truly at a loss of what to do. She is too. Praying now Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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