Amore_Amibo Posted August 7, 2017 Group: Members Followers: 1 Topic Count: 12 Topics Per Day: 0.00 Content Count: 31 Content Per Day: 0.01 Reputation: 19 Days Won: 0 Joined: 08/15/2016 Status: Offline Share Posted August 7, 2017 (edited) Hi guys. I've been having a hard time forgiving myself for hurting a very close friend of mine recently. To make a long story short, at my Bible study group, we had a Game Night event about two weeks ago. I was mad at her and upset about something, so I sat on the couch the entire time not wanting to participate. She was playing games with the other Group members, and I would completely ignore her when she asked me to join. I also left the party early because I didn't want to participate. Through most of last week, this friend and I texted each other back and forth about what happened. During texting, she told me that she was very hurt by my attitude at the party, and that she found it hard not to take it personally when I ignored her. However, because we were just texting each other, I didn't get a clear understanding of how much I had really hurt her. After all, you can only convey so much emotion through text. However, when I met with her in person a few days ago so that we could go to Bible study together, I finally saw just how wrong my actions were. She wasn't merely "bothered" by my actions like I had assumed that entire time we were texting. No. I saw that she was truly, truly hurt by what I did. She said she had forgiven me, but that she wasn't over it, and was still very hurt from when I ignored her. I feel like an absolutely terrible friend, and am having a very hard time forgiving myself. I want to move forward, and am tired of beating myself up over this. However, she's a very close friend of mine, and it hurts me to see her hurting like this. Edited August 7, 2017 by Amore_Amibo Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ladypeartree Posted August 7, 2017 Group: Royal Member Followers: 37 Topic Count: 533 Topics Per Day: 0.08 Content Count: 32,399 Content Per Day: 4.99 Reputation: 22,906 Days Won: 206 Joined: 06/21/2006 Status: Offline Birthday: 02/23/1953 Share Posted August 7, 2017 ok so you had a moody night and were not the best friend BUT you have apologised and now it is up to your friend to accept that we all have bad days and let it go ...what sort of friend doesn't understand that ???? Sounds as if there is some one sidedness going on here and time to let it go ( and maybe not go out if you are having that bad a night next time ) I assume you forgave whatever you were mad at your friend for so your friend needs to do the same Stop beating yourself up life happens apologise deal with it get on with life ... it is much too short to hold grudges and so far from being Christian attitude so let go of the anger and the hurt xxxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Amore_Amibo Posted August 7, 2017 Group: Members Followers: 1 Topic Count: 12 Topics Per Day: 0.00 Content Count: 31 Content Per Day: 0.01 Reputation: 19 Days Won: 0 Joined: 08/15/2016 Status: Offline Author Share Posted August 7, 2017 (edited) 7 hours ago, ladypeartree said: ok so you had a moody night and were not the best friend BUT you have apologised and now it is up to your friend to accept that we all have bad days and let it go ...what sort of friend doesn't understand that ???? Sounds as if there is some one sidedness going on here and time to let it go ( and maybe not go out if you are having that bad a night next time ) I assume you forgave whatever you were mad at your friend for so your friend needs to do the same Stop beating yourself up life happens apologise deal with it get on with life ... it is much too short to hold grudges and so far from being Christian attitude so let go of the anger and the hurt xxxx There were some things I left out in my original post, such as why I was having a bad night in the first place. Also, she wasn't necessarily hurt because I was having a bad night and didn't want to play. There's definitely a lot more to it than that. Something had happened between us earlier that night, which is what led to my bad attitude on the couch. I definitely get what you're saying, though. Regardless of whatever happened that night, and whatever the reasons why both of us were upset with each other, life's way too short to hold onto this kind of stuff. Both of just need to move forward and let go of any anger/frustration/grudges we have. The next time I see her this week, I'm just going to have a heart to heart talk with her, and move forward once and for all. Edited August 7, 2017 by Amore_Amibo Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sunshine 5 Posted August 8, 2017 Group: Members Followers: 2 Topic Count: 3 Topics Per Day: 0.00 Content Count: 14 Content Per Day: 0.01 Reputation: 10 Days Won: 0 Joined: 07/04/2017 Status: Offline Birthday: 11/19/1954 Share Posted August 8, 2017 Sounds like things were said or done that cannot be undone. True friendships are hard to come by but they should also be hard to break. All anyone can really do is just make a heartfelt apology and mean it. Do not add the word "but" and try to pass your actions back on to her. That is not apologizing. Then ask the LORD to help you and your friend work through this and hopefully your friendship will be stronger. If she can't or won't get past this then you have to forgive yourself and move on also. Maybe as time passes things will change. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NOONE7 Posted August 9, 2017 Group: Royal Member Followers: 18 Topic Count: 21 Topics Per Day: 0.01 Content Count: 11,715 Content Per Day: 4.64 Reputation: 9,752 Days Won: 106 Joined: 04/29/2017 Status: Offline Share Posted August 9, 2017 On 8/7/2017 at 5:56 AM, Amore_Amibo said: Hi guys. I've been having a hard time forgiving myself for hurting a very close friend of mine recently. To make a long story short, at my Bible study group, we had a Game Night event about two weeks ago. I was mad at her and upset about something, so I sat on the couch the entire time not wanting to participate. She was playing games with the other Group members, and I would completely ignore her when she asked me to join. I also left the party early because I didn't want to participate. Through most of last week, this friend and I texted each other back and forth about what happened. During texting, she told me that she was very hurt by my attitude at the party, and that she found it hard not to take it personally when I ignored her. However, because we were just texting each other, I didn't get a clear understanding of how much I had really hurt her. After all, you can only convey so much emotion through text. However, when I met with her in person a few days ago so that we could go to Bible study together, I finally saw just how wrong my actions were. She wasn't merely "bothered" by my actions like I had assumed that entire time we were texting. No. I saw that she was truly, truly hurt by what I did. She said she had forgiven me, but that she wasn't over it, and was still very hurt from when I ignored her. I feel like an absolutely terrible friend, and am having a very hard time forgiving myself. I want to move forward, and am tired of beating myself up over this. However, she's a very close friend of mine, and it hurts me to see her hurting like this. Sorry you are going through this and many can relate on this. As great advice in this thread has already been stated. Say sorry without excuse and be there for this person. It is hard I know at times, but with God all things are possible. I will pray for you and this person! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
enoob57 Posted August 9, 2017 Group: Worthy Ministers Followers: 35 Topic Count: 99 Topics Per Day: 0.02 Content Count: 40,790 Content Per Day: 7.95 Reputation: 21,262 Days Won: 76 Joined: 03/13/2010 Status: Offline Birthday: 07/27/1957 Share Posted August 9, 2017 The responsibility of a Christian is not only not to offend but not be offendable.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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