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Can i take Communion if somebody has hurt me and i avoid them at Church?


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Recently a close friend of mine was really NASTY with me at Church, in front of other people. she really hurt me. this is like the third time this sort of thing has happened. she just blindsides me out of nowhere; it happens so suddenly that i am too shocked and astonished to even think of a comeback or defend myself. And the more shocked and wide-eyed that i looked at her, the more she kept on going!!! it was awful! even the people standing around just looked amazed… but were too incredulous to say anything. 

So now i just don't want to be around her anymore. i even moved from where i normally sit to as far from her as i can get away to avoid being hurt again. i still talk to her, i am still nice to her, but i just can't let my guard down, i can’t see myself hanging with her anymore. it’s like picking a snake up and getting bit. do you pick the snake up again? NO - you avoid it, is what my logic is telling me. 

Till this day, she has not apologized; (and has never apologized for the other times either, it’s like she doesn’t realize at times that she’s talking down to me like i’m the dirt on the bottom of her shoe.) She can get really mean like as in from zero to .2 seconds from nice to nasty mean! and then back to nice just as quickly, like it never happened. i know if i speak to her about it, she'll pound me with Scripture [about nothing shall offend thee] or freak out on me some more. She has such a judgmental and critical spirit, and comes off as being superior since she’s been Saved so long.

i have spoken to her about little things in the past that she did that bothered me and she got offended and angry. She's a spiritual bully and really pushy at times; but everybody does not see this, as they don't know her like i do. Am i being unforgiving? Or doing the right thing by being non-confrontational?

Tomorrow is Communion and i don’t want to take Communion unworthily, since the Bible says that any that take Communion unworthily eateth and drinketh damnation to himself, not discerning the Lord’s body; for this cause many are weak and sickly among you and many sleep (1Cor. 11:27-30) So should i avoid communion? i don’t want to grieve The Holy Spirit and bring damnation upon myself; and i just don't want to be hurt by this woman again..... l still Love her, but is it wrong to "love her from a distance"? 

Any advice that you can give me would be appreciated. Thank You.

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You say you have already gone to her about her attitude.  At this point it might be proper to go to with another person or to counsel with a pastor.  She might have a physical condition  that affects her or even a mental condition.  We are to forgive irregardless, knowing that we aren't perfect either.  That doesn't mean you need to hang out with her anymore.  Sometimes I just determine in my heart to be especially kind to that person when they have been hurt.  

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6 hours ago, Needing Advice said:

Recently a close friend of mine was really NASTY with me at Church, in front of other people. she really hurt me. this is like the third time this sort of thing has happened. she just blindsides me out of nowhere; it happens so suddenly that i am too shocked and astonished to even think of a comeback or defend myself. And the more shocked and wide-eyed that i looked at her, the more she kept on going!!! it was awful! even the people standing around just looked amazed… but were too incredulous to say anything. 

So now i just don't want to be around her anymore. i even moved from where i normally sit to as far from her as i can get away to avoid being hurt again. i still talk to her, i am still nice to her, but i just can't let my guard down, i can’t see myself hanging with her anymore. it’s like picking a snake up and getting bit. do you pick the snake up again? NO - you avoid it, is what my logic is telling me. 

Till this day, she has not apologized; (and has never apologized for the other times either, it’s like she doesn’t realize at times that she’s talking down to me like i’m the dirt on the bottom of her shoe.) She can get really mean like as in from zero to .2 seconds from nice to nasty mean! and then back to nice just as quickly, like it never happened. i know if i speak to her about it, she'll pound me with Scripture [about nothing shall offend thee] or freak out on me some more. She has such a judgmental and critical spirit, and comes off as being superior since she’s been Saved so long.

i have spoken to her about little things in the past that she did that bothered me and she got offended and angry. She's a spiritual bully and really pushy at times; but everybody does not see this, as they don't know her like i do. Am i being unforgiving? Or doing the right thing by being non-confrontational?

Tomorrow is Communion and i don’t want to take Communion unworthily, since the Bible says that any that take Communion unworthily eateth and drinketh damnation to himself, not discerning the Lord’s body; for this cause many are weak and sickly among you and many sleep (1Cor. 11:27-30) So should i avoid communion? i don’t want to grieve The Holy Spirit and bring damnation upon myself; and i just don't want to be hurt by this woman again..... l still Love her, but is it wrong to "love her from a distance"? 

Any advice that you can give me would be appreciated. Thank You.

That hurts when a friend turns against you. I think it is wise to keep your distance from this person. You should give this situation to God in prayer and tell Him what is on your mind. It sounds from what you said that she is a toxic person. I do not think you are grieving the Holy Spirit if you take communion. We are not door mats for people to abuse. God knows that. As long as when you have to be around her you are showing your Christian fruit.

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10 hours ago, Needing Advice said:

1Cor. 11:27-30) So should i avoid communion? i don’t want to grieve The Holy Spirit and bring damnation upon myself;

if you are a true beliver you cannot bring damnation on yourself-- grieving the Holy Sprit is not good--- but it can be fixed and it doesn't make you unsaved--- okay- to your question-- If she has hurt you- and you have done nothing to hurt her back-- and you have lifted this all up to the Lord in prayer-- and asked him to help you deal with the situation in a Godly manner-- and have no other unconfessed sins you are aware of-- Take Communion-- rejoice in the Lord-- let him deal with her--

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My guess is the OP just came here to vent.

They have zero activity other than the one post.

Taking communion and being mad at someone with just cause have nothing to do with each other.

As far as friendship... to me... there are many many acquaintances in life, but few very few friends. Oh most call each other friends.  But there are few who measure up to true friendship or who are worthy of being a true friend to.

I've had five friends my whole life and two of them betrayed me and are no longer friends or in touch. Don't know. Don't care.

Two died.

My BEST friend is my beloved wife.

I shy away from making more friends. In fact I avoid it.

Often times people who "have bunches of friends" are scared to be alone. ← My beloved wife taught me that one. She was ahead of her time, a TV talk show host in Texas years ago, before we met, able to pack a few suitcases and move to New York, San Francisco, Los Angeles without hesitation. We met in NYC in 1980 2 years after she left TV in Texas and tried out for the local Good Morning New York show (which she didn't get). Very short sighted of the producers because a blonde Texan was the toast of the town for New Yorkers at the time.

She has friends (she is less picky about them than I am). But she never feared being or doing things alone.

I think she is right. Those who have to have friends or have lots of them are scared to be alone with themselves. Very astute!

Most people (like the one spoken of in the OP) can seem to be friends one minute and not the next. Most can blow you off when you need a friend and be super needy to you. The selfishness of humanity is increasing exponentially as the successive fruits of the ME Generation come of age. 

Even in the neighborly department. Young mothers had neighbors who helped them taught them through the novice times. House and barn raisings took place (granted in more rural areas of the country) until the 1990's. People DO help out with disaster relief but nothing like they used to and with far less follow up. Hey, I did my part I sent ten dollars or appeared on a telethon.... back to ME now...

Be picky. Be choosy. Don't embrace friendship at the drop of a hat. And if you want to HAVE a friend you gotta BE a friend. And learn to be comfortable with yourself.

 

 

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