sunnygal Posted October 11, 2017 Group: Newbie Followers: 0 Topic Count: 1 Topics Per Day: 0.00 Content Count: 1 Content Per Day: 0.00 Reputation: 1 Days Won: 0 Joined: 10/11/2017 Status: Offline Share Posted October 11, 2017 I would like to pray for accepting the truth in things and being able to let it go. I have two situations regarding people that I know, one being my daughters father. He doesn't care anything about her and I want to let it go in my heart. Even though I try.. the pain is still there. I say I accept it but in the deepest part of my heart.. I guess I don't. I wish that she had a relationship with him but he doesn't care at all. She is growing up well without him but I recently spoke to him about an issue. I haven't spoke to him in years.. he hasn't seen his daughter is over 5 years.. and he didn't once ask about her. How do I take the anger...hate...venom, pain, disappointment, sadness..out of my heart? I having been moving on with my life but he has been a constant in my head.. I guess what I am saying is, how can I get rid of that person out of my head completely?... I mean just forget. Can I ask God to help me to not just get past the pain but I want to forget about him. Forget about his existence. She is 8 years old. He has never been in her life... its always been just me and her.. but he has been this "ghost" in my head... I want to accept it, walk away and not think about it anymore.. unburden my heart... Its been 8 years... when will I truly get over this?? 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OneLight Posted October 11, 2017 Group: Royal Member Followers: 22 Topic Count: 1,294 Topics Per Day: 0.21 Content Count: 31,762 Content Per Day: 5.26 Reputation: 9,760 Days Won: 115 Joined: 09/14/2007 Status: Offline Share Posted October 11, 2017 It sounds to me like you try to give this issue to the Lord, but are unwilling to let it go, take your hands off it so God can heal you of your wounds. It's like poison ivy. It itches, but if you continue to scratch it, it will spread. Don't give your thoughts over to her father. Instead, focus on what you have with her now. We find in scripture the following: Philippians 4:8 Finally, brethren, whatever things are true, whatever things are noble, whatever things are just, whatever things are pure, whatever things are lovely, whatever things are of good report, if there is any virtue and if there is anything praiseworthy—meditate on these things. You know yourself that meditating on what he is not doing for your daughter only gives you more heartache. Meditate on what God has done for you and your daughter along with what is ahead for the two of you. If there is to be a change in his heart, it will not come by your continuing request, but it will come because of the Holy Spirit as He works in his heart. Remember, if you want God to fix something, you need to let it go completely, including your thoughts. How this is done is when you start thinking about it, turn from those thoughts and focus on Him. 3 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Willa Posted October 11, 2017 Group: Worthy Ministers Followers: 68 Topic Count: 185 Topics Per Day: 0.04 Content Count: 14,204 Content Per Day: 3.35 Reputation: 16,629 Days Won: 30 Joined: 08/14/2012 Status: Offline Share Posted October 11, 2017 The hurt and grief of rejection you are experiencing is both personal and on her behalf. But sometimes it is better that such a person as her father in not in her life. What kind of an example would he be to her? Is he a godly man? Would he lead her to follow Jesus and to turn away from sin? I ask this because I know someone who really wanted her daughter's biological father to be in her daughter's life. While the guy was very likable, he did not lead her to make good decisions but was a very bad example. He had children be many other women. So when she became a young teen she started running away and doing a lot of drinking. And due to the mother so badly wanting him to acknowledge her daughter, it divided her family after she did marry someone else. Perhaps it would have been better for her to write him off as a big mistake, as sin against God, and repent by not wanting anything to do with the guy. It might have been better had she tried to keep him out of her daughter's life in hopes she didn't grow up to be like him. I do hurt for both of you. There but for the grace of God go I. Part of the pain is in deep down knowing that God warns us that sex outside of marriage is forbidden sin. And He forbids it because He doesn't want us to suffer the pain that results. But every life is a treasure to Him. God can use it all for good. In the linage of Jesus were several such women and men who had to bear the result of their sin. But God made them ancestors of His Only Begotten Son. Jesus came to break the chains of sin and make you and her forgiven children of the Father, adopted into His family. Jesus died on the cross to make this possible. God loves you that much. And it is His love that will heal the wounds and enable you to move on without your daughter's father but as whole people. Praying. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GandalfTheWise Posted October 11, 2017 Group: Royal Member Followers: 24 Topic Count: 40 Topics Per Day: 0.02 Content Count: 1,459 Content Per Day: 0.61 Reputation: 2,377 Days Won: 2 Joined: 08/23/2017 Status: Offline Share Posted October 11, 2017 I recently listened to a friend's testimony in church. It was a part of her life that few people knew about. Her father had molested her from the time she was a young child until she was a teenager and could get away. She later blamed herself for him being put away and breaking up the family. For years, she just buried it and "forgot" about it. Later, God dealt with her that leaving it buried was not healthy. God took her through a process of healing and forgiveness that freed her from it. When any of us have things buried inside, those things can cause a lot of unhealthy patterns of behavior and emotion in our lives. Sometimes it is like having a broken leg and trying to run or dance. Until the leg heals, there is some stuff we simply cannot do well. Spiritual and emotional wounds are just the same. They can prevent us from running and dancing spiritually and emotionally speaking. Sometimes it is just a matter of determining to forgive someone and following through; other times, there are hurts and wounds so deep that it requires God's intervention to heal something before we can move forward. There are some things we can deal with just between God and us; there are some things that we need to have someone along side of us. Sometimes it is helpful to talk to an experienced pastor or Christian counselor. Our church has a couple ministries with mature experienced Christians that will walk alongside someone with prayer and encouragement for dealing with these things. 2 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BK1110 Posted October 12, 2017 Group: Worthy Ministers Followers: 22 Topic Count: 86 Topics Per Day: 0.03 Content Count: 6,828 Content Per Day: 2.43 Reputation: 9,555 Days Won: 4 Joined: 07/18/2016 Status: Offline Birthday: 11/10/1986 Share Posted October 12, 2017 You must pray and truly let it go. Ask God to take it from you. You're not going to have your memories erased, rather receive the strength and the peace of mind from God to carry on in spite of those memories. Praying that God heals your heart and mind! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ana Posted October 12, 2017 Group: Members Followers: 3 Topic Count: 1 Topics Per Day: 0.00 Content Count: 50 Content Per Day: 0.02 Reputation: 66 Days Won: 0 Joined: 10/01/2017 Status: Offline Share Posted October 12, 2017 (edited) - Edited June 15, 2018 by Ana 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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