what is your relationships like with your siblings?

[Equippers]

there are two parts to this thread, it would be fantastic if you can share your personal experience for both parts.

1 how would you classify your relationships with your siblings. would you consider your relationships with them or at least some of them as a) close and you know you can count on them for practical and emotional support anytime you need them or b) you get on with them fine enough, but you know you can not really count on them for anything or c) toxic and unhealthy, instead feel like being built up by them, you constantly feel like you are being torn down by them

and why do you think your relationship with your siblings is the way it is.

 

2 if your relationship with your siblings have changed over the year, what happened?

for example, is it the case where you just drifted apart. or something hurtful happened between you where you could never bridge it again or maybe you both became Christians and you were able to rebuild your relationship with your siblings into the kind of relationship you have always wanted etc

[missmuffet]

Mine are dead.  But when they were alive one brother I had a good relationship with the other I did not. It is rather common for some siblings to not get along.

[Neighbor]

Excellent!

I'm most fortunate to have a bright, hard working, and caring, younger sister. May God bless her with some wonderful years of peace and comfort and safety.

[secretopossumcabal]

My older brothers (i have 3) are all ultra progressive atheists. The two oldest frequently bullied me, the one above me was okay but he's an ultra liberal atheist and I have nothing in common with him. 

I tend to avoid interacting with them. Sometimes I think things would have been better for me if I was an only child, as the bullying habits of my 2 oldest were detrimental to my self esteem growing up.

Considering how progressive New England is and how progressive my family is, I'm like a soldier waaay deep behind enemy lines, no chance for reinforcements, only thing that keeps me sane is the occasional radio contact with the main army on the internet, but i have to keep a low-profile and hope the enemy doesn't spot me.    

[1to3]

7 hours ago, secretopossumcabal said:

I think things would have been better for me if I was an only child, as the bullying habits of my 2 oldest were detrimental to my self esteem growing up.

I think the same for myself.

I have a totally abusive older brother that learnt to abuse me through the example of my mother. My mother liked to place us in competition against one another for her affection. In the end it backfired badly on my mother as i don't think my bother gave to much regard to my mother even in her dying last moments. but i stood by my mother even in her last dying moments. I always looked for my mothers love but could never get it. she did weird stuff to me as a young child and would one moment be nice and then cruel and she would say to me she regretted i was ever born or that she preferred my brother to me. when my father died, I really felt alone with two people i knew did not want me around and made me feel it too.

Its a horrible feeling to not feel wanted or that you don't even belong in your own family. Something i felt at a very early age. (before or around two years)

I would have wished to have things different, tried all the methods to try to be friends with my brother to no avail.

My brother leaned to treat me bad through my mother.

My mother , she eventually got closer to God and Christ towards her final years in life, but was the product of world war two East Prussia Germany and probably her own dysfunction in her own early childhood. She did things to me ( that not even my father knew about) to make me feel the pain she must have experienced as a young child herself.

when i was very young, my brother said to me : I am the king and you are nothing." and proceeded to try and steal whatever i had or take away whatever i had.  He verbally/emotionally publicly and privately and physically (not sexual) abused me, at some instances) And today, if I give him the chance and he will continue on the same path.

after my mom passed, he put a stick in the wheel at every step of closing my mothers estate. It took over ten years to close.

to ever trust him after all the things he did to me would be completely foolish on my part.

I need to stay very far away from my own brother for my own survival, he is that toxic to my life.

In 2016, i lost my uncle and even then, my brother tried to keep my from going to my uncles funeral so he could get all the glory. he called me to tell me that my uncle did not care for me, hoping that would upset me enough not to go to the funeral. But close friends and business associates of my uncle were there for me and kept my brother at a distance f from me during my uncles funeral. My uncle did care for me and in fact had told his friends and business associates about my brother and to protect me from my brother.

 

Its really sad.

I definitely know that if my brother had Christ Jesus in him , that he would be a changed human being.

But he is an atheist and relentlessly mocks anyone who believes in God.

Families that are close and friendly and christian with one another, is very foreign to me. sadly.

I was given the family i was given to learn . and so I am learning from this experience.

Only through finding a daily relationship in Christ Jesus have I been able to heal a lot of early childhood wounds and trauma. and without Christ Jesus in my life, i  would be in a very sad place today if not completely dead.

 

 

 

 

 

Edited December 7, 2017 by 1to3

[Celtic Baptist]

Unfortunately my older brother is very atheist and is hardened to the truth. Well in with this world he is. Likewise are my family and would disown me if they found out of my real beliefs. 

[Equippers]

9 hours ago, secretopossumcabal said:

My older brothers (i have 3) are all ultra progressive atheists. The two oldest frequently bullied me, the one above me was okay but he's an ultra liberal atheist and I have nothing in common with him. 

I tend to avoid interacting with them. Sometimes I think things would have been better for me if I was an only child, as the bullying habits of my 2 oldest were detrimental to my self esteem growing up.

Considering how progressive New England is and how progressive my family is, I'm like a soldier waaay deep behind enemy lines, no chance for reinforcements, only thing that keeps me sane is the occasional radio contact with the main army on the internet, but i have to keep a low-profile and hope the enemy doesn't spot me.    

i am really sorry to hear this

i am not quite sure what your personal circumstances is like.....

sounds like you are not part of a church community for one reason or another

God be with you and bless you.

[Equippers]

2 hours ago, 1to3 said:

I think the same for myself.

I have a totally abusive older brother that learnt to abuse me through the example of my mother. My mother liked to place us in competition against one another for her affection. In the end it backfired badly on my mother as i don't think my bother gave to much regard to my mother even in her dying last moments. but i stood by my mother even in her last dying moments. I always looked for my mothers love but could never get it. she did weird stuff to me as a young child and would one moment be nice and then cruel and she would say to me she regretted i was ever born or that she preferred my brother to me. when my father died, I really felt alone with two people i knew did not want me around and made me feel it too.

Its a horrible feeling to not feel wanted or that you don't even belong in your own family. Something i felt at a very early age. (before or around two years)

I would have wished to have things different, tried all the methods to try to be friends with my brother to no avail.

My brother leaned to treat me bad through my mother.

My mother , she eventually got closer to God and Christ towards her final years in life, but was the product of world war two East Prussia Germany and probably her own dysfunction in her own early childhood. She did things to me ( that not even my father knew about) to make me feel the pain she must have experienced as a young child herself.

when i was very young, my brother said to me : I am the king and you are nothing." and proceeded to try and steal whatever i had or take away whatever i had.  He verbally/emotionally publicly and privately and physically (not sexual) abused me, at some instances) And today, if I give him the chance and he will continue on the same path.

after my mom passed, he put a stick in the wheel at every step of closing my mothers estate. It took over ten years to close.

to ever trust him after all the things he did to me would be completely foolish on my part.

I need to stay very far away from my own brother for my own survival, he is that toxic to my life.

In 2016, i lost my uncle and even then, my brother tried to keep my from going to my uncles funeral so he could get all the glory. he called me to tell me that my uncle did not care for me, hoping that would upset me enough not to go to the funeral. But close friends and business associates of my uncle were there for me and kept my brother at a distance f from me during my uncles funeral. My uncle did care for me and in fact had told his friends and business associates about my brother and to protect me from my brother.

 

Its really sad.

I definitely know that if my brother had Christ Jesus in him , that he would be a changed human being.

But he is an atheist and relentlessly mocks anyone who believes in God.

Families that are close and friendly and christian with one another, is very foreign to me. sadly.

I was given the family i was given to learn . and so I am learning from this experience.

Only through finding a daily relationship in Christ Jesus have I been able to heal a lot of early childhood wounds and trauma. and without Christ Jesus in my life, i  would be in a very sad place today if not completely dead.

 

 

 

 

 

sorry to hear this God bless

[Equippers]

2 hours ago, Celtic Baptist said:

Unfortunately my older brother is very atheist and is hardened to the truth. Well in with this world he is. Likewise are my family and would disown me if they found out of my real beliefs. 

sorry to hear this

it sounds really bad

i am surprised given the fact you are from UK, they would be like this

are you originally from somewhere else by any chance?

anyway, it seems time is changing fast, dark clouds is coming and it is only matter of time before open persecution of Christians follows.

[Neighbor]

How sad  that siblings,  family in general, workplace coworkers, and our community may not know of any saint in Christ Jesus within their family and associates with a certainty.

The shame to be felt for eternity will be far deeper a scar, on a Christian, than the physical political and economic abuse can ever make.

Many are already missed. Some have already  gone away to their death. And to separation from God. 

I have certainly failed to my shame. But too there are those still stunned to know that I am Christian. They think I became a pastor, or a deacon, or an evangelist, and they are stunned that this once profane voice of atheism in the world is of the flock of Jesus.  God must be awesome and powerful to have turned him about, maybe there is something to this God.

Better to take abuse than to be the abuse that does not share of  Jesus and salvation by His grace and mercy.

What better time to write a letter spelling out what has happened, make a testimony  be a witness! Forgive the offenses and do not offend another in kind.

What better time of year? Than today, -always today. Surprise a sibling, a parent, a child, write them a letter  and share of God. Think I have need to do just that. 

 

Edited December 7, 2017 by Neighbor