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Can an unmarried couple sleep in the same bed and they know they aren't going to have sex?


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23 hours ago, JMan108 said:

She and I have never had sex before in our lives and we're 21 and 22 years old. We can wait.

That still does not make it right to sleep with your girlfriend before you are married. Sex or no sex. It is not the Christian thing to do. It is not appropriate.

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On 28/12/2017 at 9:29 PM, JMan108 said:

My girlfriend is coming up to visit me and she is obviously staying in my house (I still live with my parents since I'm in college). Can we share a bed when we know we're not going to be having sex? We have already said that is off the table and we know we're saving ourselves for marriage.

why not you and your father  share a bed and your girlfriend share a bed with your mother?

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I see a lot of commentary here where people are declaring what would and wouldn't be "too much temptation" for the OP.  The OP can decide that on his own.  Seems the question being asked is if the act of sharing a bed without having sex is wrong, and I fail to see anything in the Bible saying that it is.

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Well, look at it this way. If you don't get married, you just slept with someone else's wife. Not in that... Particular sense, but still. Nobody needs that kind of temptation, anyhow. 

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...why on earth would you think it's a good idea to give him "ammunition" to do so?!

With that logic, no one would travel to places in the middle east where Christianity is forbidden by law to witness.  Such a situation makes being strong and having faith and not denying God MUCH harder.  Why not let the OP decide how much temptation is too much, for himself?  He's got access to God through prayer just like we do 

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On 12/28/2017 at 8:29 PM, JMan108 said:

My girlfriend is coming up to visit me and she is obviously staying in my house (I still live with my parents since I'm in college). Can we share a bed when we know we're not going to be having sex? We have already said that is off the table and we know we're saving ourselves for marriage.

I'd say the temptation would be very strong. However, it would also be a test to see if you are as committed to saving yourselves for marriage as you claim. 

Isn't there a guest bedroom she can stay in? Do you have a pull out couch? One that turns into a bed? 

How long is she staying? Why not put her up at a hotel? 
I've slept with a man I'm not married to when I was young. Very early 20's. Nothing happened. Well, we talked until we fell asleep but that was it. 

If there is no place else for her to sleep sure, offer her your bed. She knows she's being invited to your house. If she wanted not to be in a situation of temptation she could easily get herself a hotel room. 
May God guide you.

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LOL to "Sojourner414".  It's amazing to me how much more hostile the so-called "Christians" on this forum are than many atheists I know.  If you are so easily offended by those who disagree with you, perhaps you shouldn't go around telling other people how wrong they are, especially coupled with snide remarks like yours. 

Thanks for removing yourself from the conversation so that those who do wish to participate still can! 

Quote

There's a world of difference between going to the middle east on a mission, and deliberately giving Satan a foothold by entering into a compromising situation. One is entering into an area where there is a culture hostile to Christianity, and the other is entering into a situation that specifically not only gives a bad impression and poor witness, but flings open the door for sexual immorality to occur. If you think that to be wrong, then Joseph fleeing Potiphar's wife was also wrong as well.

Nope.  Joseph fleed Potiphar's wife because she was tempting him into adultery.  Her intentions were obviously to do the deed.  OP's intentions are to *not* have sex.  Let OP decide what is too much temptation to bear.  Like I said before, he has access to God in prayer as much as we do.  It's unwise to subtract or ADD from God's word.  The Bible doesn't prohibit what he's asking to do.  If, as an adult, I share a hotel room with my brother, also an adult, then OBVIOUSLY nothing will happen.  Why?  There is ZERO intent to do anything immoral.  The OP likewise has ZERO intent to do anything immoral.  If that indeed is true, then why are people here trying to decide FOR HIM what's too much temptation to bear?  Stick to the Bible and prayer. 

Matthew 7:2 " 1Do not judge, or you will be judged. 2For with the same judgment you pronounce, you will be judged; and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you. 3Why do you look at the speck in your brother’s eye, but fail to notice the beam in your own eye? "

The remaining scriptures you mentioned might be valid if the OP felt tempted, but he's stated he doesn't.  I'll give him the benefit of the doubt and let God be the sole judge instead of judging others. 

Edited by stillseeking
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Avoid all appearance of evil. It's sorta obvious Jman. It seems we have some one here who does not appreciate the answers you requested. That's cool, as most forum members here also respect his view. Though as you have already demonstrated, with much counsel is much wisdom. Your doing the right thing here, I believe, seeking help about something you may have doubts about. Or you wouldn't be asking. And it is your decision.
About twelve years ago, my son ask if his fiance, whom we knew for some time,  could stay at our small home, as her household was getting out of control. She stayed with us about 3-4 months. She took my son's room, my son took the living room couch. Ninety five percent of the time, someone else was at home with them.  I was more concerned with the propriety of the situation.  If they wanted to, there was much easier ways to find a more private place for hanky panky. They were solid, well grounded believers, and I trusted them. This was a delicate situation. Later, she moved to her own apt, and they got married. Four kids for them, our seventh, eighth, eleventh and twelfth grand kids.
Sometimes it's exciting to do something a little dangerous, like walking along the edge of a sheer thousand foot cliff, seeing just how close you can get. Without falling. People stumble. All the time.

There's an old story of a wise and rich  nobleman seeking a strong horseman to carry his only son safe when traveling. There was a test first. There were three contestants.  The first horseman raced his horse very fast to within a few feet of the cliff edge showing his great  horsemanship. The nobleman nodded. The second horseman realized he had to do better, so he went as fast as the horse could run, with only inches from the edge, returning and told the last man "beat that!"
The last man mounted his horse them moved further away from the dangerous cliff and rode at a trot, circled and returned. Any guess as to which man the nobleman picked to keep his beloved from danger.
The
wise one who kept his  beloved son away from danger.

 

 

 

 

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