Neighbor Posted January 16, 2018 Group: Worthy Ministers Followers: 18 Topic Count: 951 Topics Per Day: 0.35 Content Count: 13,565 Content Per Day: 5.03 Reputation: 9,045 Days Won: 6 Joined: 12/04/2016 Status: Offline Birthday: 03/03/1885 Share Posted January 16, 2018 Hi cyber acquaintances, how ya'll do'n? Friends- just what is a friend today? Is it different today than it was in the past? How different? In what manner? The above are just a few opening questions born of curiosity as I read comment after comment about individuals not having friends today. Lets see where the conversation goes, if anywhere. Lets not dwell too long on how many if any friends each of us have or don't have. That is a sad little Facebook thing. Let's instead start with what is a friend? What is desired of a friend, and how do we individually try to be a friend? Thanks for reading - 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GreyDestiny Posted January 16, 2018 Group: Advanced Member Followers: 1 Topic Count: 21 Topics Per Day: 0.01 Content Count: 131 Content Per Day: 0.06 Reputation: 59 Days Won: 0 Joined: 01/08/2018 Status: Offline Share Posted January 16, 2018 I must be honest in admitting that I don't know how to define a friend. Lack of friendship today is brought about not only by technology but also age. Not only are more people spending far too much time with their faces in their phones, but opporunities for friendships seem to diminish the older you get. I'd also say a lack of social exposure; a generation raised by television, internet, and video games has little experience with people face-to-face and feel uneasy about gaining it. As a young man, I must admit to falling into this category; I simply haven't spent enough time around strangers growing up and now I find conversation to not only be somewhat vexing but also pretty exhausting. What I do in terms of being friendly is preferring to listen more than I speak (though one can do the vice-versa; someone's got to do the talking), offering a helping hand if it is needed, and not intruding on another's time or life in an inconvenient or unpleasant way. If I can help it, at least. 2 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Oh Hamburgers! Posted January 16, 2018 Group: Diamond Member Followers: 1 Topic Count: 10 Topics Per Day: 0.00 Content Count: 2,144 Content Per Day: 0.34 Reputation: 163 Days Won: 1 Joined: 02/02/2007 Status: Offline Birthday: 11/05/1985 Share Posted January 16, 2018 I'd say a friend is someone that you can count on to (usually) have your best interest in mind when making personal decisions that affect you. Essentially, if they care about your well being alongside their own personal interest I'd consider them to be a friend. 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
frienduff thaylorde Posted January 16, 2018 Group: Mars Hill Followers: 17 Topic Count: 18 Topics Per Day: 0.01 Content Count: 13,256 Content Per Day: 5.34 Reputation: 1 Days Won: 62 Joined: 07/07/2017 Status: Offline Birthday: 03/25/1972 Share Posted January 16, 2018 A true friend is one who LOVES JESUS FIRST above all things , mother wife, son daughter etc. A friend like that will put your welfare above even his own. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BeyondET Posted January 16, 2018 Group: Royal Member Followers: 0 Topic Count: 118 Topics Per Day: 0.05 Content Count: 2,868 Content Per Day: 1.23 Reputation: 816 Days Won: 0 Joined: 11/29/2017 Status: Offline Birthday: 04/01/1968 Share Posted January 16, 2018 (edited) Removed Video. Edited January 17, 2018 by Steve_S Removed video. Please post videos in the appropriate video forum. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
missmuffet Posted January 16, 2018 Group: Royal Member Followers: 34 Topic Count: 1,991 Topics Per Day: 0.48 Content Count: 48,689 Content Per Day: 11.81 Reputation: 30,343 Days Won: 226 Joined: 01/11/2013 Status: Offline Share Posted January 16, 2018 A best friend and a true friend is hard to find. We have many friends but a best friend is a blessing if you have one. - A true or a best friend friendship grows over time. - Be sure that the best friend that you have and the friend you are going to take advise from is a born again Christian. You can not be unevenly yolked. - You pray together. - You have the same interests and values. Iron sharpens iron. - You need to have respect for that friend. - True friends will be honest with each other. They will be humble in their friendship. - You must have true forgiveness in that friend. - Sacrificial friendship and love for that best friend is the best friendship that you can find. Sacrificial love is the most precious friendship you will have. Give of yourself to that friend. If they need help or if they are ill be there for them. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HisFirst Posted January 16, 2018 Group: Royal Member Followers: 21 Topic Count: 315 Topics Per Day: 0.11 Content Count: 3,491 Content Per Day: 1.26 Reputation: 2,582 Days Won: 3 Joined: 09/25/2016 Status: Offline Share Posted January 16, 2018 Hi Neighbour, Good question! I know it takes a lot of work to be a friend because like any human relationship, we are all flawed within it, so time spent, patience given, turning the other cheek and a lot of love is essential. Most of us just couldn't be bothered to expend all that energy - and now with our new friend (internet) who does our bidding on call, well why look for human contact....? Sad but true. And true friends are rare.... 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
missmuffet Posted January 17, 2018 Group: Royal Member Followers: 34 Topic Count: 1,991 Topics Per Day: 0.48 Content Count: 48,689 Content Per Day: 11.81 Reputation: 30,343 Days Won: 226 Joined: 01/11/2013 Status: Offline Share Posted January 17, 2018 I don't think a person can be a best friend over the computer because you do not know that person. All you know is the words that they type. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
john1 Posted January 17, 2018 Group: Senior Member Followers: 4 Topic Count: 41 Topics Per Day: 0.02 Content Count: 686 Content Per Day: 0.30 Reputation: 221 Days Won: 0 Joined: 12/16/2017 Status: Offline Share Posted January 17, 2018 11 hours ago, Neighbor said: how do we individually try to be a friend? I've got my wife as a friend, and a few people I talk to some, facebook says I got all kinds of friends but I don't go on there, only did it to sell expensive air pistols I wanted to get rid of, but I'm a loner. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Neighbor Posted January 17, 2018 Group: Worthy Ministers Followers: 18 Topic Count: 951 Topics Per Day: 0.35 Content Count: 13,565 Content Per Day: 5.03 Reputation: 9,045 Days Won: 6 Joined: 12/04/2016 Status: Offline Birthday: 03/03/1885 Author Share Posted January 17, 2018 Age sure does take it's toll! For decades my friends were work associates, we played cards. We went to events. We partied at each others homes shared tales about our kids. We just hung out, but again age and later career changes and self employment have all taken a huge toll too. I am the last surviver as far as I know of my old younger days work associates. Most of them died rather young not making it to their fifties. I no longer bowl, but did have some fun friends from that arena; did develop very close friends kayaking, but hey I did become a fifth wheel when my wife died, and the kayaking friendship became one from a distance afterward. And they too suffered ills and failing bodies and moved. Guess it takes some common interests, and the ability to function ( too) around those interests to retain friends. All my casual neighbor friends, well they up and died, or just moved out of State to be back with their kids in their old age. Has it always been this way with people? Perhaps, but I do think it is weird when people get together to be close yet not interact, instead just text on a phone. Who is everyone hooked up to on the phone that they are texting? Is it a real person that they know? For a few years I did became the fifth wheel- after my wife died. Now I have a new friend- a new wife, and we have joint need to build a social circle of our own. For that we do need to be social ourselves. So I am hoping to get more involved perhaps with home Bible discussion groups, informal not some hard debate format, and playing cards or old time parlor games ( anyone even have a parlor today?). Don't know if this is going to be easy or not. But; - I am aware of the sense of being alone that others have shared on this message board. And maybe;- I need to make some group travel plans -trip to Israel , the Cove, or wherever, just to meet some individuals- and also hope they have broken thumbs or no smart phone. LOL. One thing I am thinking on; is it friendship on the internet social boards and Christian message boards or chat forums? Missmuffett also has addressed it, and there is the aspect of distance and lack of personal touch literally I suppose. BUT, what of the history of pen pals? Do we really need a pen or quill, or might we have a computer, message pad, or texting device instead? HEY! I just recently ( One year now) married the gal I met on the internet, on a Christian message board. She is more that a friend of course, but wow she is a friend. I remember the one time Zola Levitt "appeared" on that message board with the help of it's moderator and answered questions. It became a chat format, and a denier of Christ challenged him. They went off board to "chat". The person and Zola came back later. That person had been turned by the Holy Spirit to his own repentance and had become Christian. So is that real a real friendship that developed online? I asked Zola what he thought- He said it is as real as being beside each other if each are sharing, - of their heart, mind, and soul, is the way I think he meant it in our conversation. For we too were sharing of real expression and concern as friends might. Hmm;- perhaps habits, defensive methods of avoiding being "hurt" become entrenched and prevent the making of real friends either by pen, internet, or in person? ??? Spouse has a real friend on the internet. They are quite close. I know her too. She is a real person with real adventures and love of Christ and troubles and joys and a real place where she lives somewhat near where we are thinking of purchasing a retreat from the city. Retreat- maybe that is a word to discuss too. Is it hard to make friends because of having developed a retreat attitude a "shields up Scotty" mindset that makes it hard to receive friendship, and therefore never have to be a friend to someone else nor find ones self hurt or disappointed in a friendship? ??? Short prayer, may all be led by the Holy Spirit toward a willingness to suffer the hurts that can come from trying to be a friend, and may many become a good friend to someone this year. p.s. - I sure enjoy the comments to date, they are helping me think. I am still quite interested in reading more about friendship. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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