LozzaLauren Posted February 10, 2018 Group: Newbie Followers: 0 Topic Count: 1 Topics Per Day: 0.00 Content Count: 1 Content Per Day: 0.00 Reputation: 0 Days Won: 0 Joined: 02/10/2018 Status: Offline Share Posted February 10, 2018 Hi Im have been raised right but i am in my first relationship and im very very confused about what is right and wrong with interaction between my bf and i. I do not want to sin but im so confused as i read different things in many different ways. Its confusing as i read some things that make me understand whats allowed and whats not allowed but then some other stuff i read, is not so clear and kind of says certain things are ok Im trying to do my best to not sin but very confused Thanks Lauren Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BK1110 Posted February 10, 2018 Group: Worthy Ministers Followers: 22 Topic Count: 86 Topics Per Day: 0.03 Content Count: 6,857 Content Per Day: 2.42 Reputation: 9,581 Days Won: 4 Joined: 07/18/2016 Status: Offline Birthday: 11/10/1986 Share Posted February 10, 2018 No sexual activity of any kind, for starters. It should be pointed out that there is no such thing as "dating" or "boyfriend/girlfriend" in the Bible. There are people who are unmarried, people who are engaged, and people who are married. Dating is a modern concept, and there are tons of problems with it. Which is not to say you can't date anyone. But you need to keep it pure. Date in public places. Don't be totally alone with each other. Don't go to each other's homes unless adults will be present. Remember that the call to sexual purity has to do with the mind and heart just as well as the body; if an action will lead either of you to sin in your minds and hearts, it should be avoided just as much as physical sexual activity is. If he has a problem with that, then he is not anyone you need to be dating. Finding a husband/wife is the goal. If it is clear that the other person is no spouse material, it's time to cut it off, immediately. Please look up Voddie Baucham's teachings on love and marriage on Youtube. It is the BEST teaching I've ever heard on the subject. All young people NEED to hear it. 2 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ana Posted February 11, 2018 Group: Members Followers: 3 Topic Count: 1 Topics Per Day: 0.00 Content Count: 50 Content Per Day: 0.02 Reputation: 66 Days Won: 0 Joined: 10/01/2017 Status: Offline Share Posted February 11, 2018 (edited) - Edited June 15, 2018 by Ana 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Logan Posted February 11, 2018 Group: Diamond Member Followers: 23 Topic Count: 32 Topics Per Day: 0.01 Content Count: 1,849 Content Per Day: 0.47 Reputation: 2,013 Days Won: 24 Joined: 07/08/2013 Status: Offline Birthday: 10/15/1996 Share Posted February 11, 2018 It's a whole lot easier to not start something than it is to figure out where and how to stop. 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GandalfTheWise Posted February 11, 2018 Group: Royal Member Followers: 24 Topic Count: 40 Topics Per Day: 0.02 Content Count: 1,459 Content Per Day: 0.60 Reputation: 2,377 Days Won: 2 Joined: 08/23/2017 Status: Offline Share Posted February 11, 2018 17 hours ago, LozzaLauren said: Hi Im have been raised right but i am in my first relationship and im very very confused about what is right and wrong with interaction between my bf and i. I do not want to sin but im so confused as i read different things in many different ways. Its confusing as i read some things that make me understand whats allowed and whats not allowed but then some other stuff i read, is not so clear and kind of says certain things are ok Im trying to do my best to not sin but very confused Thanks Lauren The most important thing about any relationship is the person you are in the relationship with. There are few details provided, so here is some general advice. Is he a serious Christian with at least some degree of spiritual maturity? Does he have a good devotional life? Is he comfortable with praying and reading his Bible regularly? Is he a person of good character and integrity? Is he a person who will be a great parent for your children? Does he come from a solid family that you like? Is he a hard worker? Does he have good career prospects? Is he clear of any substance abuse problems or emotional problems? Do your friends, parents, and family think he is a good person for you? If all of this is true, you've got the potential foundation for a good relationship. If not, get some distance now. Most importantly, what is your sense of where God is leading you? Is your bf a potential marriage partner that God has lead you to? Fast forward 10 to 20 years from now. Marriage takes work. It takes both partners committed to making it work. Things change in life; both partners change; situations change; the relationship changes. Both partners need to keep at it for decades. I say this from the perspective of over 30 years of marriage. I cannot imagine life without my wife right now. We both have good families that get along well. We have good sets of supportive friends. We are spiritually compatible and have wanted to go to similar churches and ministries. We were largely in agreement about how to raise kids. But, we've both changed over the years. Neither of us are the same person who got married back in the early 80s. We changed and our marriage had to change with it. I cannot imagine how difficult it would have been if my wife were not a woman of spiritual maturity, integrity, and character. The bottom line is that the initial infatuation, passion, and high levels of emotions fade over time. In a healthy marriage, over time it is replaced with contentment, stability, being comfortable, and just in general becoming a big part of each others' lives. When the subject comes up, most Christian couples I know (speaking of people married for decades) admit to problems keeping their hands off each other to some extent before they got married. The main thing is just applying some wisdom and prudence about being alone together as well as getting a clear sense of where God is taking your relationship. Many young couples pray about who to marry, but rarely pray about *when* to get married. Extended engagements (i.e. we'll get married years from now after we graduate from school) are a minefield. As your relationship progresses, it is natural to become more intimate emotionally and spiritually and physically. Putting off a marriage for a long period of time can seriously mess with this natural progression and growth of a relationship. The bottom line is, is your BF the person God is leading you to marry? If so, when is He leading you to get married? If your focus is on particular details of what is and is not permissible to do, my guess is that there might be bigger and more important issues that need to be addressed. 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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