Dear brothers and sisters,
Okay, wow. I just woke up from another dream about my mom who passed several years ago. And everytime I do, it's always in the setting of when I used to be her care provider for years before she died. They're never happy dreams, and Mom is always angry about something. It's because at times she would get upset about things due to her senile dementia. Most of the time she had a simple childlike demeanor about her, and we got along terrifically. I miss her so very much.
Anway, in this dream, there she and I were in our home that we shared for many decades. Just sitting there and all appeared to be pretty good. Now two of my cats are now gone. One was quite old and passed away on the porch of my varanda while I've been here in this wretched place. My sister, I dunno. She had the information incorrect about the the other two I had. Apparently, it was my little girl who ran off when she saw me being carried off on a gurney.
I suppose she thought I'd never be coming back home. And I guess assuming I was already dead, as I almost was when my sister found me. So, according to the latest or so my sister told me, my beautiful Turkish Angora Blue is still there just waiting for me to come back home to him. Yes, and he's not young anymore and is probably hoping I'll be coming back to be with him again. I don't feel there's too many years for him to be living. I need to go to him. He needs me.
Sorry for this mixup, but I'm pretty distraught right now. Back to the dream. I'm there back at home with Mom, my sister and we're just visiting as we've done. Mom was almost completely deaf the years before she passed, but developed the ability to lip read. So there we were just talking. All of a sudden fireworks started going off in the neighborhood as they do July 4th. My cats were always kept inside, because it's a very frightening experience for all cats and dogs.
All of a sudden My little girl Sugar came leaping into the house. I knew in my dream that she'd run away shortly after I had been taken to the hospital. And she came running up to me and laid down beside me in the floor on the carpet. I started to weep for joy at her coming back home, and there she was with me once again. Then I woke up and began to cry here. I tried to find one of the nurses and get a chance to talk to them, but they were too busy as usual.
I have no idea where Sugar is now, but my boy Smokey is still there waiting for me. Just waiting for the day to be rejoined once again. I gotta get back to him. I need him and he needs me. My pets are the only children I've ever had. Though their little lives are so short, one seems to come into my life when another passes. Again, I apologize for this story being so hard to follow. I'm just expressing the trouble from out of my heart's distress. Please pray for me. Thank you. God bless.
Pslams 27 An Exurberant Declaration Of Faith, Ephesians 6 Is The Suit Of Armor!! I had to come to the End of my self to be Blessed With This Truth......First Step Is Declaring The Goodness Of The LORD, preparing myself for the next Step, Step Two Spiritual War.....I stand on this with every ounce of Truth that Jesus Is!! I can't tell folks enough just how VITAL this is in our Spiritual Warfare, one cannot afford to back down, one must Remain Standing, no matter what! I trust God with all that I am for it is not my goodness that brings the victory, it is HIS..... we, as children of the Most High must TRUST HIM, No Matter What!! To Fear Him is a Literal Blessing Of Vital Importance, It's POWERFUL!!
February 6,2020 will be 3 years that a diagnosis of Stage 4 NSCLC Metastatic, I was not to have survived the month, my SECRET started 18 months before the diagnosis, got laid off and lost my home and became homeless, 9 days later the left side of my brain paralized and my speech, then the diagnosis....I was in a homeless shelter and was coughing up blood, so I said to the LORD, if I am still doing this come morning I will go to the homeless clinic.... morning came as did the blood, kept my word and went to the clinic, an X-Ray was ordered, while I was waiting for the results I went to the smoking area and sat down at the pinic table facing the East.... it was crazy, NO ONE CAME OUT FOR A SOLID 45 Minutes, it was God and me.....dude, the ground didn't shake, no fire works went off, no bells were ringing, BUT He Showed UP!!
This is the talk we had on that day: Abba this just can't be turburculousis, I can't bare that, all these ladies and their babies getting sick because of me, Please don't let it be that....response, Warmth Came Across My Face and I continued.... we's about to find out what it is, well LORD I should say, I'm fixin to find out what You already know, I think its cancer Abba, this is bigger than me, but it ain't Bigger Than You...I ain't askin You to heal me or deliver me, no Sir, I ask for Peace...I will walk through anything You want me too, BUT, I ain't goin through it Without You.....Jesus, don't let it take over my Brain, I couldn't bare not being able to say Your Name or Speak Your Word, I don't care if I don't remember my childrens names or anybody eleses, Your Name, Your Word I must have....response, His was Standing Right Beside me, His Hand on my shoulder.....He Granted me my Request.....
Many things have happened over these 3 years, MANY....I AM STANDING IN JESUS AS HE STANDS IN THE FATHER, AS KING DAVID IS A MAN AFTER GOD'S OWN HEART!!! Ya'll Jesus told us, it's Gonna Be HARD, BUT, He Paid The Price IN FULL For ALL OF US....Question is, do you believe Him? This diagnosis has been a BLESSING, tears are rolling down my face as I type this, lessons, beauty, grace, WOW, it ALL SAYS " I'm alive IN JESUS ", truth somebody has it worse than me, I count this As Joy, for my LORD calls me His Friend and will take care of me, I'M STILL ALIVE and you can not tell at all that cancer is Present.....I trusted Him as a child and Bless His Sweetness Towards me He kept His Promise.......
I love ya'll with The Father's Love and am confident that the Race Set Before U, U Already Have The Victory, Just Read These Two Chapters and Allow The Grace To Take Place, it's Beautiful, it's Jesus.......