*Zion* Posted August 7, 2018 Group: Royal Member Followers: 16 Topic Count: 154 Topics Per Day: 0.04 Content Count: 3,245 Content Per Day: 0.78 Reputation: 2,397 Days Won: 9 Joined: 12/09/2012 Status: Offline Birthday: 05/11/1984 Author Share Posted August 7, 2018 Praise God! I'm not out of the woods yet but I know God is working! I have more strength than I have had in a long time. I am praising God more than i have done in a long time. I don't see the way through yet but i know it's coming into sight. breakthrough is coming, and the glory will be the Lord's alone. Thank you for your continued prayers! 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Billiards Ball Posted August 7, 2018 Group: Diamond Member Followers: 3 Topic Count: 5 Topics Per Day: 0.00 Content Count: 1,502 Content Per Day: 0.66 Reputation: 662 Days Won: 0 Joined: 02/05/2018 Status: Offline Share Posted August 7, 2018 On 8/5/2018 at 5:16 PM, *Zion* said: Looking for any advice and prayers. I don't know how else to describe it. I feel trapped. After 9 slow years and 3 kids I have come to the very concrete realization that my husband is a passive aggressive narcissit/sociopath/psychopath. I have real questions about his salvation. I took him for better or for worse. The only way out of marriage by divorce is if one of us cheats. It won't be me. I would really appreciate all your prayers, this is so difficult for me to go through. There is only one thing my husband is interested in: control and power. He doesn't care about me or our children. We are just social experiments to him. I feel bad for him that he is the way he is, but I have to keep my distance if I am to survive mentally and emotionally. Please keep me in your prayers, guys, i need all the prayers that I can get. GET THIS BOOK NOW, written by a Christian survivor of a Christian Narcissist/Sociopath: https://www.amazon.com/Dear-Younger-Me-Victim-Victor/dp/1987560418 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
*Zion* Posted August 15, 2018 Group: Royal Member Followers: 16 Topic Count: 154 Topics Per Day: 0.04 Content Count: 3,245 Content Per Day: 0.78 Reputation: 2,397 Days Won: 9 Joined: 12/09/2012 Status: Offline Birthday: 05/11/1984 Author Share Posted August 15, 2018 On 8/7/2018 at 3:18 PM, Billiards Ball said: GET THIS BOOK NOW, written by a Christian survivor of a Christian Narcissist/Sociopath: https://www.amazon.com/Dear-Younger-Me-Victim-Victor/dp/1987560418 Thank you billiards. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
*Zion* Posted August 15, 2018 Group: Royal Member Followers: 16 Topic Count: 154 Topics Per Day: 0.04 Content Count: 3,245 Content Per Day: 0.78 Reputation: 2,397 Days Won: 9 Joined: 12/09/2012 Status: Offline Birthday: 05/11/1984 Author Share Posted August 15, 2018 My husband wants our pastors to counsel us. I'm suspicious. They love him, and they think I'm a bad fit for the church. I agreed to it. I have nothing to hide, nothing to lose and even if they kick me out of the church or how bad it can get, I guess I just wasn't meant to be part of that congregation. I've been there since 2002. I've poured out my heart in minstry in this church. But if it's time to go, then I trust God for myself and my children. Pray for me. 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sharky and George Posted August 15, 2018 Group: Advanced Member Followers: 5 Topic Count: 168 Topics Per Day: 0.08 Content Count: 394 Content Per Day: 0.19 Reputation: 197 Days Won: 0 Joined: 06/26/2018 Status: Offline Birthday: 12/28/1983 Share Posted August 15, 2018 By what you say, it sounds like you need a divorce i.e. "he is a sociopath" etc. Mind you Paul the Apostle used to do horrible things to Christian's before his amazing ministry so maybe try the counselling as there is nothing to lose and then after more research like someone else said, make a decision. A idea - I do not know the degree of his ways. I take it that your understanding is that you do not want a divorce as it would be counted as adultery. Consider the ethical question: if there is a young lady who is about to have a baby and will not be able to look after the baby then should the baby be aborted? I agree that abortion is murder and that the Word is perfect but this is also a fallen world and Jesus Himself overrides some scripture with other scripture that was more applicable at the time and situation e.g. when debating with the Pharisees. So we have an ethical question about your marriage too. We strive to be perfect as Christian's but we cannot be perfect till heaven. I am not saying sin, and definitely not willfully either: Quote 1 John 1:8 English Standard Version (ESV) 8 If we say we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us. If he is a sociopath then you could save you and your children's lives. Food for thought. Bless you, I am praying. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
*Zion* Posted August 15, 2018 Group: Royal Member Followers: 16 Topic Count: 154 Topics Per Day: 0.04 Content Count: 3,245 Content Per Day: 0.78 Reputation: 2,397 Days Won: 9 Joined: 12/09/2012 Status: Offline Birthday: 05/11/1984 Author Share Posted August 15, 2018 2 hours ago, Sharky and George said: By what you say, it sounds like you need a divorce i.e. "he is a sociopath" etc. Mind you Paul the Apostle used to do horrible things to Christian's before his amazing ministry so maybe try the counselling as there is nothing to lose and then after more research like someone else said, make a decision. A idea - I do not know the degree of his ways. I take it that your understanding is that you do not want a divorce as it would be counted as adultery. Consider the ethical question: if there is a young lady who is about to have a baby and will not be able to look after the baby then should the baby be aborted? I agree that abortion is murder and that the Word is perfect but this is also a fallen world and Jesus Himself overrides some scripture with other scripture that was more applicable at the time and situation e.g. when debating with the Pharisees. So we have an ethical question about your marriage too. We strive to be perfect as Christian's but we cannot be perfect till heaven. I am not saying sin, and definitely not willfully either: If he is a sociopath then you could save you and your children's lives. Food for thought. Bless you, I am praying. You don't know how many times i have weighed in my heart exactly all these things. I am praying. It's hard, because anger has now replaced any love I ever had for him. I am utterly, helplessly furious at him. But I give it all to God in the desperation of prayer, as he feeds off of any reaction he can manipulate. He feels powerful in doing so. Let's see what God will do. The counselling session is this Friday evening. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
enoob57 Posted August 16, 2018 Group: Worthy Ministers Followers: 35 Topic Count: 99 Topics Per Day: 0.02 Content Count: 41,013 Content Per Day: 7.97 Reputation: 21,365 Days Won: 76 Joined: 03/13/2010 Status: Offline Birthday: 07/27/1957 Share Posted August 16, 2018 4 hours ago, *Zion* said: You don't know how many times i have weighed in my heart exactly all these things. I am praying. It's hard, because anger has now replaced any love I ever had for him. I am utterly, helplessly furious at him. But I give it all to God in the desperation of prayer, as he feeds off of any reaction he can manipulate. He feels powerful in doing so. Let's see what God will do. The counselling session is this Friday evening. Prayed.... Love, Steven Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Debp Posted August 16, 2018 Group: Worthy Ministers Followers: 52 Topic Count: 1,013 Topics Per Day: 0.15 Content Count: 12,263 Content Per Day: 1.79 Reputation: 16,320 Days Won: 92 Joined: 07/19/2005 Status: Offline Share Posted August 16, 2018 4 hours ago, *Zion* said: You don't know how many times i have weighed in my heart exactly all these things. I am praying. It's hard, because anger has now replaced any love I ever had for him. I am utterly, helplessly furious at him. But I give it all to God in the desperation of prayer, as he feeds off of any reaction he can manipulate. He feels powerful in doing so. Let's see what God will do. The counselling session is this Friday evening. Is it possible, if you feel so led by God, to talk to your pastors privately before your counseling session, ahead of Friday session....and tell them of incidents where your husband exhibits sociopath or psychopath behavior? Once you give them specific incidents, you can say that you wanted them to know what has been happening to you and your children within the marriage....since they have never seen that side of your husband. If those pastors don't have the wisdom to recognize sociopath or psychopath behavior, I wonder about them. Let us know what happens. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Billiards Ball Posted August 16, 2018 Group: Diamond Member Followers: 3 Topic Count: 5 Topics Per Day: 0.00 Content Count: 1,502 Content Per Day: 0.66 Reputation: 662 Days Won: 0 Joined: 02/05/2018 Status: Offline Share Posted August 16, 2018 Narcissists/sociopaths are very good at hiding, even in Christian pastoral counseling, which is why I recommended the new book--it has glowing reviews to date. Thanks. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Debp Posted August 16, 2018 Group: Worthy Ministers Followers: 52 Topic Count: 1,013 Topics Per Day: 0.15 Content Count: 12,263 Content Per Day: 1.79 Reputation: 16,320 Days Won: 92 Joined: 07/19/2005 Status: Offline Share Posted August 16, 2018 5 hours ago, Billiards Ball said: Narcissists/sociopaths are very good at hiding, even in Christian pastoral counseling, which is why I recommended the new book--it has glowing reviews to date. Thanks. Yes, I know he will hide his true personality. That's why I think she should privately tell the pastors specific examples of his abuse. From that they should hopefully realize his sociopathic, etc, tendencies. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts