Jump to content
Sign in to follow this  
naominash

Becoming Antisocial

Recommended Posts

I'm sad and I don't want to talk to people anymore. Aside from hoping I'll make friends at the new church, I've become very withdrawn from social media and all old acquaintances and close friends. If it weren't for my husband, I'd be living as a recluse. 

 

I used to be the kind of person who was so eager to reach out to someone... sometimes to a fault. Now I feel like, why bother? I always end up caring about people more than they care about me. 

 

It's like I've locked away the part of me that used to want to be everyone's friend. Now I'm on the other extreme and I'm wondering what to do. I don't actually want everyone I knew to forget about me, I just don't want to feel their indifference. 

Edited by naominash
  • Loved it! 1
  • Praying for You! 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hi naominash,

Oh how sad, how hurtful others must have been to you, yet I do want to help you. It seems you have reached out to others eagerly -

`I used to be the kind of person who was so eager to reach out to someone... sometimes to a fault, and then -

I always end up caring about people more than they care about me.` 

You seem to have a wrong expectation of what being friends is all about. People are at different stages of maturity and you need to appreciate where they are at. If you are expecting the same response from them as you give them, you are not being realistic. If you are wanting their love, and care then really only God can supply that for He truly knows our inner heart. Save that for Him.

As you go around meeting your `friends` then try and see what stage of maturity they are at. Then only, yes only give of your heart at that level. No good expecting and pouring out you heart to them if they are not mature enough to cope with that. Be much more selective and appropriate in your reaching out.

regards, Marilyn.

 

 

  • Loved it! 2
  • Thanks 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
8 hours ago, naominash said:

I'm sad and I don't want to talk to people anymore. Aside from hoping I'll make friends at the new church, I've become very withdrawn from social media and all old acquaintances and close friends. If it weren't for my husband, I'd be living as a recluse. 

 

I used to be the kind of person who was so eager to reach out to someone... sometimes to a fault. Now I feel like, why bother? I always end up caring about people more than they care about me. 

 

It's like I've locked away the part of me that used to want to be everyone's friend. Now I'm on the other extreme and I'm wondering what to do. I don't actually want everyone I knew to forget about me, I just don't want don't want to feel their indifference. 

Hi, rather than go to the other end of the spectrum (recluse-like), perhaps you just need to find a balance in reaching out and helping others.  Then that way you won't become so drained when people don't reciprocate.

  • Thumbs Up 1
  • Loved it! 1
  • Thanks 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
8 hours ago, naominash said:

I'm sad and I don't want to talk to people anymore. Aside from hoping I'll make friends at the new church, I've become very withdrawn from social media and all old acquaintances and close friends. If it weren't for my husband, I'd be living as a recluse. 

 

I used to be the kind of person who was so eager to reach out to someone... sometimes to a fault. Now I feel like, why bother? I always end up caring about people more than they care about me. 

 

It's like I've locked away the part of me that used to want to be everyone's friend. Now I'm on the other extreme and I'm wondering what to do. I don't actually want everyone I knew to forget about me, I just don't want don't want to feel their indifference. 

Hi, 

It is hard to be a friend. That takes a lot out of a person. It is easier not to care for then when  help and comfort is needed by you and it doesn't come there is little disappointment. But you can't do that, for you do care. So you are sad. That makes sense to me. 

Please don't give up being cordial to all, but perhaps save a closer friendship for a few in order to retain the energy needed in friendships. Maybe you will find that church or a lady's Bible study group where you will gain  a real friend or two. Not many have real close friends least not more than a very few of them.

I am positive that both you and your husband are cared about by many even on this social media device Worthy Christian Forums. My wife and I have been in prayer for both of you  asking that you two specifically remain safe, as we pray about hurricane Florence.

 

May you be led by the Holy Spirit to that group whether church or a small Bible study  that will make for gaining a close friend or two that can be depended upon when you are in need. Amen.

 

 

  • Loved it! 3

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hi Naominash

Every time I see your avatar I remember the times you have said some very kind and wonderful things to people.  God loves you sis - don't lose heart.  Jesus is walking with you.  I think a lot of us are experiencing difficulty in these difficult times.  I am praying for everyone in the US right now as you face yet another challenge from the weather, in particular in your State.  You are in my prayers sister.

  • Thumbs Up 2
  • Loved it! 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
11 hours ago, naominash said:

It's like I've locked away the part of me that used to want to be everyone's friend. Now I'm on the other extreme and I'm wondering what to do. I don't actually want everyone I knew to forget about me, I just don't want to feel their indifference. 

:consoling2: I'm so sorry, sis. I can hear the pain in your post. Thank you for sharing your heart with us. I have been in this situation at times and can truly empathize with your struggle. I know what you mean about being ignored or the victim of indifference. 

There are no simple answers, imo. Seeking God's Face is all I can do sometimes... crying out to Him in prayer and realizing He alone will never let me down. He, (unlike people) is incapable of being insensitive or neglecting me.

That being said, it is a natural need to have friends that will stand by you through thick and thin. Scripture stresses the importance of fellowship as we are all members of the body of Christ. We really should be there for one another. One part can not survive removed from the other parts, even as with our earthly bodies. 

I will pray you find friends at the new church soon. In the meanwhile, you are always welcome to pm me if you feel lonely or need to vent in any way... As Neighbor said, you are cared about here. I hope I will always have made you feel wanted and special, for you truly are.

I am concerned about you and the danger of Florence. I am praying for the safety of you and your husband. Do you guys have a safe place to go to or is it far enough away that you won't have to leave?

 :emot-hug:Hugs and prayers, turtletwo

Edited by turtletwo
added to it
  • Thumbs Up 2
  • Loved it! 2

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
1 hour ago, turtletwo said:

:consoling2: I'm so sorry, sis. I can hear the pain in your post. Thank you for sharing your heart with us. I have been in this situation at times and can truly empathize with your struggle. I know what you mean about being ignored or the victim of indifference. 

There are no simple answers, imo. Seeking God's Face is all I can do sometimes... crying out to Him in prayer and realizing He alone will never let me down. He, (unlike people) is incapable of being insensitive or neglecting me.

That being said, it is a natural need to have friends that will stand by you through thick and thin. Scripture stresses the importance of fellowship as we are all members of the body of Christ. We really should be there for one another. One part can not survive removed from the other parts, even as with our earthly bodies. 

I will pray you find friends at the new church soon. In the meanwhile, you are always welcome to pm me if you feel lonely or need to vent in any way... As Neighbor said, you are cared about here. I hope I will always have made you feel wanted and special, for you truly are.

I am concerned about you and the danger of Florence. I am praying for the safety of you and your husband. Do you guys have a safe place to go to or is it far enough away that you won't have to leave?

 :emot-hug:Hugs and prayers, turtletwo

We have moved far enough inland to expect some rain but not much else. Thank you so much for showing you care. It means a lot.

  • Loved it! 3

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Thank you, everyone who prayed for me in this area.

My husband and I are having lunch with the pastor of the church I've been visiting. I was also included in the women's bible study for this Tuesday evening. 

It's like finding water in the desert! I am so happy.

  • Thumbs Up 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Sign in to follow this  

×