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Equippers

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hello

i am currently having some serious issues going on in mine life, which i have shared some of it in mine post Catch22

i have seen this Charles Stanley sermon once which come back to me now, and that is sin or disobedience short circuit our prayer life, that is God can not help us if we have an area in our life where we are not in obedience of Him.

there is one area in mine life that i can think of, and that is my current source of income. i am not doing anything that is technically illegal, but still i know i am not being honest about the whole thing.

i am scared, because giving my current ongoing situation, i need God's help more than ever, as well as His protection and guidance in all other areas of mine life.

but i also feel the need to talk to someone, to be able to discuss the situation in detail on how to properly stop my current source of income as there are implications etc.

i am wondering if God would be understanding of the situation and give me the help to make the right decision by giving me the opportunity of talk to a right person and think/talk things through so i can do this properly and safely......

i have been leaving prayer requests at different places asking people to pray for me for right guidance to come alone, i am wondering if God would at least grant this prayer and give me the help i need to do this.....

what do you think i should do?

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it would be beyond anything I know to know what you should do without knowing everything going on....   and then all I could possibly do is to tell you what I personally would do; which might not be what is best for you.....   but unless you explain what's happening How can anyone understand and offer any help.  The information in Catch 22 leaves more questions than answers.

 

 

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3 hours ago, Equippers said:

hello

i am currently having some serious issues going on in mine life, which i have shared some of it in mine post Catch22

i have seen this Charles Stanley sermon once which come back to me now, and that is sin or disobedience short circuit our prayer life, that is God can not help us if we have an area in our life where we are not in obedience of Him.

there is one area in mine life that i can think of, and that is my current source of income. i am not doing anything that is technically illegal, but still i know i am not being honest about the whole thing.

i am scared, because giving my current ongoing situation, i need God's help more than ever, as well as His protection and guidance in all other areas of mine life.

but i also feel the need to talk to someone, to be able to discuss the situation in detail on how to properly stop my current source of income as there are implications etc.

i am wondering if God would be understanding of the situation and give me the help to make the right decision by giving me the opportunity of talk to a right person and think/talk things through so i can do this properly and safely......

i have been leaving prayer requests at different places asking people to pray for me for right guidance to come alone, i am wondering if God would at least grant this prayer and give me the help i need to do this.....

what do you think i should do?

I disagree with Charles Stanley.. If sinning prevents God from hearing ones prayers and helping us then God would be hearing no prayers and He would be helping no one because all people are sinners Christians and non-Christians alike.. 

The reason we are in continuous need of the LORD is because we are still faulty humans needing His Atonement...

As for your particular circumstance i hope the LORD gives you a way to flee what ever it is your conscience is now convicted about..  May His will be done..

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7 hours ago, Equippers said:

hello

i am currently having some serious issues going on in mine life, which i have shared some of it in mine post Catch22

i have seen this Charles Stanley sermon once which come back to me now, and that is sin or disobedience short circuit our prayer life, that is God can not help us if we have an area in our life where we are not in obedience of Him.

there is one area in mine life that i can think of, and that is my current source of income. i am not doing anything that is technically illegal, but still i know i am not being honest about the whole thing.

i am scared, because giving my current ongoing situation, i need God's help more than ever, as well as His protection and guidance in all other areas of mine life.

but i also feel the need to talk to someone, to be able to discuss the situation in detail on how to properly stop my current source of income as there are implications etc.

i am wondering if God would be understanding of the situation and give me the help to make the right decision by giving me the opportunity of talk to a right person and think/talk things through so i can do this properly and safely......

i have been leaving prayer requests at different places asking people to pray for me for right guidance to come alone, i am wondering if God would at least grant this prayer and give me the help i need to do this.....

what do you think i should do?

I think Adstar makes a good point.   Of course, the Lord hears our prayers.   Remember we are seen as righteous by God the Father through our faith in Christ as our Savior.  Of course, we should try to forsake sins, but the Lord still loves us and hears our prayers.

About the source of income, we would all need to know a little more about this before commenting on it.

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7 hours ago, Equippers said:

....    sin or disobedience short circuit our prayer life, that is God can not help us if we have an area in our life where we are not in obedience of Him.   ...

Our relationship with God is based on Jesus' atoning work, not on our ability to perfect ourselves.   Areas of sin, weakness, and other problems in our life are things that God is working on to change us.   Having said that, those things can often hinder our ongoing relationship with God, not because of His disgust or anger with us, but rather that they distract us, discourage us, make us feel unworthy, so that we feel guilty and want to hide from God.

With regard to God not answering prayers, Christians have been asking about this, pondering this, and trying to fully understand this for millennia.  With regard to "unanswered" prayers, here are a few things I've observed.    Sometimes God is working in our lives (and others' lives) in ways we don't understand and so we complain and ask Him to do it differently.   Sometimes we are simply asking for things out of convenience or immaturity.   Sometimes we are completely losing focus on God Himself and starting to only see what He can do for us.

In the middle of trials, we sometimes need to ask ourselves a few things.  One thing is "what is this trial revealing about me?"  When things are going well, we can easily keep on the masks and smoothly keep on going like we normally do.   When things start to go badly, it can reveal what's inside.  Maybe our temper starts to snap, maybe we become afraid, maybe we start to act out what we normally keep hidden.   Often trials reveal parts of ourselves we've not admitted or even realized are there.  A few years ago, I had a job situation that kept getting more and more stressful until I physically collapsed one day at work and almost passed out.  I left that job and took many months to recover.  During that time, God used it to point out that I had way too much anger in my life.  It was not anger directed at people (or I would have immediately recognized that as a problem), but it was anger directed at situations and things I could not control.  In hindsight, I had always viewed this as a positive thing that I "cared" a lot or that I was "showing concern" for things and that this misdirected emotion and passion was somehow useful.  It was not.  It was only eating me up inside over things I could do nothing about and distracting me away from the things God really wanted me to focus on.   I would have certainly preferred God to have instantaneously healed me of the stress issues, and that once I'd learned my lesson that things would immediately start going better.  But it took a several month process to learn to live, think, and feel and to simply relearn to live life without a ton of self-induced anger and stress.  I had to reestablish habits of living that were healthier and more productive.

At times, our greatest struggles come when we start to feel inside that God is holding out on us.  It boils down to us not trusting that He has our best interests at heart.  At times, trials and struggles are a refining furnace that God is using to reveal the dross inside of us from the pure gold and silver that He is refining.  At times, we are in a process of growth and change that takes time.

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8 hours ago, Equippers said:

hello

i am currently having some serious issues going on in mine life, which i have shared some of it in mine post Catch22

i have seen this Charles Stanley sermon once which come back to me now, and that is sin or disobedience short circuit our prayer life, that is God can not help us if we have an area in our life where we are not in obedience of Him.

there is one area in mine life that i can think of, and that is my current source of income. i am not doing anything that is technically illegal, but still i know i am not being honest about the whole thing.

i am scared, because giving my current ongoing situation, i need God's help more than ever, as well as His protection and guidance in all other areas of mine life.

but i also feel the need to talk to someone, to be able to discuss the situation in detail on how to properly stop my current source of income as there are implications etc.

i am wondering if God would be understanding of the situation and give me the help to make the right decision by giving me the opportunity of talk to a right person and think/talk things through so i can do this properly and safely......

i have been leaving prayer requests at different places asking people to pray for me for right guidance to come alone, i am wondering if God would at least grant this prayer and give me the help i need to do this.....

what do you think i should do?

Hi Equipper,

My suggestion is to talk to say - GandalfTheWise, privately about the details of your situation.

Marilyn.

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48 minutes ago, Marilyn C said:

Hi Equipper,

My suggestion is to talk to say - GandalfTheWise, privately about the details of your situation.

Marilyn.

:)  I'm always happy to PM with people.   My sense here though is that there are a lot of legal and medical details and perhaps other things that are far beyond my experience and capabilities.  I've been able to toss out a few general spiritual insights that are perhaps of some help,  but I just sense like there is too much here for us to adequately help remotely.  My general sense is that someone (perhaps a local pastor? or local Christian counselor?) who has much more familiarity and experience with the various NZ systems as well as various medical things would be a far better fit.  Someone who through experience knows little things like what to wear to a court hearing, what to say or not to say, how to navigate the system, who has familiarity with the healthcare system, etc. could probably provide much practical help and guidance.    I think an appropriate prayer request here would be that God brings the right person (or persons or perhaps local church or support ministry or informal Christian small group) to walk alongside in real life.

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1 hour ago, GandalfTheWise said:

Our relationship with God is based on Jesus' atoning work, not on our ability to perfect ourselves.   Areas of sin, weakness, and other problems in our life are things that God is working on to change us.   Having said that, those things can often hinder our ongoing relationship with God, not because of His disgust or anger with us, but rather that they distract us, discourage us, make us feel unworthy, so that we feel guilty and want to hide from God.

 

thank you

you are right we are all work in progress

i guess i was thinking not so much about areas that i keep prone to sinning ( i probably did not express myself well) i meant unresolved sin.

so for example, so let if i ripped someone off, and i "still" have not return him the money for whatever reason even though i do feel bad about it.....

would that put block to God ability to help me, not that He doesn't want to, but because He can't until i put things right...

that is the impression i get from the Charles Stanley sermon.

thank you again for your input i really appreciate it.

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5 hours ago, Equippers said:

thank you

you are right we are all work in progress

i guess i was thinking not so much about areas that i keep prone to sinning ( i probably did not express myself well) i meant unresolved sin.

so for example, so let if i ripped someone off, and i "still" have not return him the money for whatever reason even though i do feel bad about it.....

would that put block to God ability to help me, not that He doesn't want to, but because He can't until i put things right...

that is the impression i get from the Charles Stanley sermon.

thank you again for your input i really appreciate it.

There are times where God will put something on our heart that we need to do, and He'll keep reminding us.   My opinion is that He will at times start to force the issue for us if it is something important to us to deal with, but it is more of a "c'mon my child, you really need to do this for your own good..." rather than a "Do this or else!!!" type of thing.

With regard to unresolved things involving other people, I try to follow God's leading.  Sometimes, it's best to leave the past in the past; and other times it is best to resolve things.  One important thing (if we have wronged someone) is to not put any pressure on them for a particular response.  We just apologize, make good, (or whatever is appropriate), and not expect them to immediately forgive us, be happy or whatever response we are hoping for.  Sometimes it may take them time to process our apology and restitution.

There is a book I've found insightful with regard to apologies.  The 5 Languages of Apology by Gary Chapman and Jennifer Thomas.  They basically note that different people expect to receive apologies in different ways.  Some people just want to hear "I'm sorry."  Other people want you to clearly confess what was wrong to make sure you know what you did.  Other people want restitution.  Other people want to make sure that you have changed so it won't happen again.  And some people want you to ask for forgiveness.  The challenge is that apologizing in a way that doesn't mean something to someone can potentially just make someone more angry.

I found the book helpful because I'm very much a "I don't care what you say or do, just make sure you've changed so it doesn't happen again" type.   My middle daughter is very much a "I'm sorry"  (and now everything is fine) type.   In hindsight, this led to some head butting between us because she'd say "I'm sorry" to me and then get frustrated when I didn't let it go but want to see tangible signs of change.  I also realized that there were times she simply needed to hear me say the words "I'm sorry" regardless of what I was doing to make sure I didn't do it again.  

I've got no clue how to figure out what the best way is to apologize to someone ahead of time.  I'll try to hit all 5 forms in some way.  I'll explicitly say I'm sorry, do a quick summary of what I did wrong, do a quick summary of what I'm doing to stop it from happening again, and offer to make it good in some way.  I tread very very carefully on asking them to forgive me because some people react badly to that.  I usually reserve asking for forgiveness until I have a clear sense that that would provide meaningful closure to an apology rather than ruining a meaningful apology by putting pressure on them to instantly respond and accept it.

 

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10 hours ago, GandalfTheWise said:

There are times where God will put something on our heart that we need to do, and He'll keep reminding us.   My opinion is that He will at times start to force the issue for us if it is something important to us to deal with, but it is more of a "c'mon my child, you really need to do this for your own good..." rather than a "Do this or else!!!" type of thing.

With regard to unresolved things involving other people, I try to follow God's leading.  Sometimes, it's best to leave the past in the past; and other times it is best to resolve things.  One important thing (if we have wronged someone) is to not put any pressure on them for a particular response.  We just apologize, make good, (or whatever is appropriate), and not expect them to immediately forgive us, be happy or whatever response we are hoping for.  Sometimes it may take them time to process our apology and restitution.

There is a book I've found insightful with regard to apologies.  The 5 Languages of Apology by Gary Chapman and Jennifer Thomas.  They basically note that different people expect to receive apologies in different ways.  Some people just want to hear "I'm sorry."  Other people want you to clearly confess what was wrong to make sure you know what you did.  Other people want restitution.  Other people want to make sure that you have changed so it won't happen again.  And some people want you to ask for forgiveness.  The challenge is that apologizing in a way that doesn't mean something to someone can potentially just make someone more angry.

I found the book helpful because I'm very much a "I don't care what you say or do, just make sure you've changed so it doesn't happen again" type.   My middle daughter is very much a "I'm sorry"  (and now everything is fine) type.   In hindsight, this led to some head butting between us because she'd say "I'm sorry" to me and then get frustrated when I didn't let it go but want to see tangible signs of change.  I also realized that there were times she simply needed to hear me say the words "I'm sorry" regardless of what I was doing to make sure I didn't do it again.  

I've got no clue how to figure out what the best way is to apologize to someone ahead of time.  I'll try to hit all 5 forms in some way.  I'll explicitly say I'm sorry, do a quick summary of what I did wrong, do a quick summary of what I'm doing to stop it from happening again, and offer to make it good in some way.  I tread very very carefully on asking them to forgive me because some people react badly to that.  I usually reserve asking for forgiveness until I have a clear sense that that would provide meaningful closure to an apology rather than ruining a meaningful apology by putting pressure on them to instantly respond and accept it.

 

thank you for your clarification and advice i really appreciate it 

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