Lonely Christian

[frienduff thaylorde]

13 minutes ago, TechEnthusiast said:

Why do church people not invite people to their houses? I remeber thinking it was because I was different than I was told no one hangs out with anyone else for months at a time?

The thing is that people who have family have a measure of company even if its not perfect. They don't seem to even get that there are so many people who desperately need company.

It is so very painful. personally i don't even ask for money or anything(apart from a ride). This is very confusing to me. How is this anything even sort of close to the new testament. They 

sold all they had and put it in a pool(not asking for this). They won't even spend some time with me. How is this Christian? I hear that its different other places, but I wonder. The reason is is American Christanity has 

spread quite a lot.

This will correct itself in due time .    You can see the true love of GOD at work in some of the poorest most persecuted churches.  Everyone is included and everyone

will share all things and have all things common .   The prosperity gospel destroyed churches , the cares and pleasures in life just choked the word right out of many .

But soon we will all hear the call , as worldwide we are stripped of many things and outcasts .  We will be living in persecution and cast out of jobs , out of places

but just like those poor ones overseas ,   THEY the happiest ones I ever seen .  their joy is real and their peace is real .  And many of them too

said , when they lived high in society they thought they had it all ,  But WHEN GOD allowed persecution ,  and stripped them bare  ,  THEY NOW SEE , they were lost

in a delusion and now their hope is real , FOR the only one they can trust and hope in IS CHRIST .   And what a joy this is .

Even with only lite persecution , I GOT MY JOY , CAUSE I GOT MY HOPE , AND ITS Not here on earth or the things of this earth . ITS THE LORD .   AND that is THE ONLY HOPE WE NEED .

Persecutions will increase .    We will be refined ,  and for now , let us look out for one another .    Knowing our TREASURE IS ABOVE

and our Strength is THE JOY of the LORD and the salvation of the LORD our JOY  .    Dig in and praise the LORD .  

[frienduff thaylorde]

22 minutes ago, TechEnthusiast said:

Why do church people not invite people to their houses? I remeber thinking it was because I was different than I was told no one hangs out with anyone else for months at a time?

The thing is that people who have family have a measure of company even if its not perfect. They don't seem to even get that there are so many people who desperately need company.

It is so very painful. personally i don't even ask for money or anything(apart from a ride). This is very confusing to me. How is this anything even sort of close to the new testament. They 

sold all they had and put it in a pool(not asking for this). They won't even spend some time with me. How is this Christian? I hear that its different other places, but I wonder. The reason is is American Christanity has 

spread quite a lot.

To answer your question .   The cares and pleasures of life , the pride of life , the lusts of the flesh has choked the LOVE of GOD , the WORD right out of many hearts .

To answer your question . ITS NOT CHRSITAIN at all .     I am heavily worried for many churches now .   They got all their priorities backwards .  ITS IN THE WORLD

and their talks are about HOW to SUCEED in the world , HOW to get ahead .   they look down on the poor , though they don't want to believe they do .

But remember GOD has called the poor , RICH IN FAITH .    Marvel not , nor be envious of what any of these have .   What they have is vanity

BUT those are CHRISTS ,    THEY GOT ALL HOPE .    YOU LEAP UP RIGHT NOW and PRAISE THE HOLY LORD .  YOU REJOICE .  REJOICE in the LORD .

its these others that do these things we should feel sorrow for .    THEY have no idea what they have lost , let alone that they are still lost .

SO many have no idea what the church has lost .  I mean no idea .    LET us read those bibles only MORE .   LET us rejoice when we are persecuted and hated .

We were never promised the easy life in this world ,   BUT OH PRAISE THE LORD we will have peace IN HIM , no matter what we lose , no matter how cast out we are ,

WE will ABOUND IN THE LORD .    NOW raise those hands ,  RAISE THEM UP ,  and JUST HOLLER OUT PRAISES TO THE LORD .    HE IS WITH US .  PRAISE THE LORD .

[Guest Naturebuff]

I could have written your post, I was in a similar situation, it was devastating to loose absolutely everything, you have my heartfelt sympathies.  

Something changed a short while ago for me and it is quite liberating and I believe it is pleasing to God.

A couple of different people at church while talking to me, (who knew nothing of my situation), talked about changing one’s attitude.  It hit me and I knew it was from God.  I needed to change my attitude from the toils of my mind and the hurt in my heart and feeling sorry for myself.

I also decided that I would not take offense to what others said (or thought) about me. I find that can start the ball rolling again. 

I told God how sorry I was, how ashamed I was and that I want to change. Though my heart is still broken and this is hard on me to not revert back, I praise Him and thank Him and keep asking for help to forgive others and to be in humility and to love them. I feel so much better and the peace I have is a gift. 

Love for God and of our brothers and sisters in Christ is utmost, even when our family hurts us to the core. I think He hears us when we love and are humble and forgiving.  He seems to answer prayers more quickly. 

 

[Neighbor]

On 10/8/2018 at 11:32 PM, TechEnthusiast said:

I go to church btw. I will say with a reasonable degree of certainty that if you are poor it is many times harder than what your saying. People expect a lot more than they even know. Often there is literally nothing you can do to get people to include you. I know that you might want to think better of people who go to church but Ill tell you its not that way. if your car was taken and your money and your vocational and social skills were all taken and then you moved I promise you it would feel impossible to find people to connect with. I know that people want to think highly of people who go to church. They are gigantic sinners that are clean on the outside.

Gee, while I believe the plight to be real, I think I disagree with almost the entirety of the conclusions as presented, for I personally have been pulled away from all that I  knew and counted upon  three times now. As I think about it, I have been pulled across country from coast to coast of the USA. I have lost all "my" money more than once lots and lots of it twice. I have been in debt to the point my asset ( balance )  sheet would read minus  many thousands of dollars. Yet that has had absolutely nothing to do with my having anyone want to associate with me. All that has affected my associations is me! I own what I am, I cannot blame it upon  others. I suspect that may be true of all individuals.

Misery loves company as much as success and comfort do, maybe more. For I think misery has more friends than does success.  Guess it depends on how one defines success. To me  success is in running the race and finishing well. It is not in the numbers of people that love me, but in the number  I will love regardless of how I am treated or perceive I am being treated. In fact, I try to make no time available for such assessment as how many do I think provide me something, and instead just try to be of assistance in an eleemosynary manner when and were I am led. It may not work that way  for others, but that is how it seems to be for me. So I share in hope it may lead to some introspection that does bring relief from  the pain that  evidently has come from assessing how many friends one has.

Real life is not  like Facebook's simulation of it. Nothing at all like it. Don't buy into the Facebook mentality, it is evil at it's very core. Instead find joy in victory as our Lord's bond-servant. Ask and listen and heed the call to service that the Holy Spirit will lead into for the gospel's sake. And do not worry all that much about self. Praise God in all things giving thanks often  for the smallest of blessings and opportunities even the harsher ones.

Praise to God -do all things that are done to His glory.

 

 

Edited October 15, 2018 by Neighbor
for clarification

[TechEnthusiast]

It will never cease to me the variety Of people. There are the encouragers. There are the your doing it Wrongers. Also encouragement 

Often turns into advice that takes all the Goodness of that encouragement Away. Church needs to act like the New testament church. They really

Need to love each other and not Let culture drown own God's love. Culture dictates that  Christians have 2 to 4 kids a job 

And no time for outsiders. It would be fine if it where s few But it's the vast majority of The church and really what are

People to do? The church in its Current state is sink or swim On your own. If your 100 percent, autonomous then you are fine.

For now the culture war has won. It made a bunch of single people And gave them no hope or Reason to go to church.

Looks are valued to highly. Abilities are valued to highly. Money is valued too highly. Singles are ignored.

A lot of churches look healthy, but They are a dumpster fire. How could love be absent? How can they just redefine what

Love is. People have redefined Family as well. Now they don't have to love Or be a family to outsiders. Just some random thoughts.

This reminds me of when the Pharisees changed the rules so they didn't have to help their parents in their old age.

Edited October 15, 2018 by TechEnthusiast

[walla299]

I'll say this from my own experience, and what was passed on to me by others inside and outside the recovery groups. There were times when I didn't wanna hear it but I needed to. 

1. The only time most folks will seek help is when it hurts too bad to keep avoiding it.

2. Jesus will help you, but you have to show up for the battle. Plenty of examples of that in the OT. God fought the battle, but He still expected the Israelites to show up. (Think about the Jericho story.) A person has to step out in faith and trust the Lord, in other words.

3. If you don't feel at home in one (recovery) group (or church in this case) then ask the Lord's direction and try another! 

4. It took me a year and a half to find the church I go to now. 1.5 years of wasted Sundays during a time when I had little money, little to no fellowship, no car, and a mountain bike and a bus card. God provided, but I had to go look just like the Israelites had to show up for the battle.

5. It's very likely positive change will not happen until a person steps out in faith and starts trying to do the next right thing while trusting that the Lord will provide what's needed.

[John_Leung]

It partly depends on how the church is structured.  The Bible says we are all members of the body with Christ as the head, and we are to love, edify, and care for one another because we belong to the same eternal family.  Some churches only have short worship and sermon and then maybe snack time, and those who are already close would talk, leaving others in an awkward position.  People at the church I go to are very close. We make sure no one is left behind, and we often serve in groups. I'm a shy and reserved person, but someone would talk to me regardless.  

To me, no Christian should be lonely, even though they may not have a spouse or family (like me).  Even the disciples were seldom be alone until later in their ministries. It's difficult to be close to anyone if the meeting place doesn't emphasize family and togetherness. 

[Mike Mclees]

10 hours ago, John_Leung said:

It partly depends on how the church is structured.  The Bible says we are all members of the body with Christ as the head, and we are to love, edify, and care for one another because we belong to the same eternal family.  Some churches only have short worship and sermon and then maybe snack time, and those who are already close would talk, leaving others in an awkward position.  People at the church I go to are very close. We make sure no one is left behind, and we often serve in groups. I'm a shy and reserved person, but someone would talk to me regardless.  

To me, no Christian should be lonely, even though they may not have a spouse or family (like me).  Even the disciples were seldom be alone until later in their ministries. It's difficult to be close to anyone if the meeting place doesn't emphasize family and togetherness. 

I am not much of a conversational person so I don't have close friends. I have one close friend who said I will never leave thee or forsake thee. We spend time together every day and he is my strength when I feel lonely. My lifetime companion has gone on home several months ago. Her picture is on my desk and her smile brightens my day. Three days after the funeral I picked up my daily Bread devotion and was shocked when the title for the lesson was. Goodbye by for now.  You see she is not gone forever, only for a while and we will be together again with Jesus at our side. I pray this comforts someone. 

Pray daily and read you devotions and always be reminded we are never really alone. Jesus has not forgotten you 

[TechEnthusiast]

Remember that people in your life really need to have people spend time with them. There are a lot of people who spent all of their time alone. It is very hard to be all alone. I hope that people will get that

and spend a little more time with people who need them.

[Neighbor]

For to me to live is Christ, and to die is gain. If I am to live in the flesh, that means fruitful labor for me. Yet which I shall choose I cannot tell. I am hard pressed between the two. My desire is to depart and be with Christ, for that is far better. But to remain in the flesh is more necessary on your account. Convinced of this, I know that I will remain and continue with you all, for your progress and joy in the faith, so that in me you may have ample cause to glory in Christ Jesus, because of my coming to you again. Only let your manner of life be worthy of the gospel of Christ, so that whether I come and see you or am absent, I may hear of you that you are standing firm in one spirit, with one mind striving side by side for the faith of the gospel, and not frightened in anything by your opponents. This is a clear sign to them of their destruction, but of your salvation, and that from God.  For it has been granted to you that for the sake of Christ you should not only believe in him but also suffer for his sake, engaged in the same conflict that you saw I had and now hear that I still have. So if there is any encouragement in Christ, any comfort from love, any participation in the Spirit, any affection and sympathy, complete my joy by being of the same mind, having the same love, being in full accord and of one mind. Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others. Have this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus, who, though he was in the form of God, did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, but emptied himself, by taking the form of a servant, being born in the likeness of men. And being found in human form, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross. Therefore God has highly exalted him and bestowed on him the name that is above every name, so that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth, and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father.Therefore, my beloved, as you have always obeyed, so now, not only as in my presence but much more in my absence, work out your own salvation with fear and trembling,  for it is God who works in you, both to will and to work for his good pleasure. Do all things without grumbling or disputing, that you may be blameless and innocent, children of God without blemish in the midst of a crooked and twisted generation, among whom you shine as lights in the world,  holding fast to the word of life, so that in the day of Christ I may be proud that I did not run in vain or labor in vain. Even if I am to be poured out as a drink offering upon the sacrificial offering of your faith, I am glad and rejoice with you all. Likewise you also should be glad and rejoice with me. I hope in the Lord Jesus to send Timothy to you soon, so that I too may be cheered by news of you. For I have no one like him, who will be genuinely concerned for your welfare. For they all seek their own interests, not those of Jesus Christ. But you know Timothy's proven worth, how as a son with a father he has served with me in the gospel. I hope therefore to send him just as soon as I see how it will go with me, and I trust in the Lord that shortly I myself will come also. I have thought it necessary to send to you Epaphroditus my brother and fellow worker and fellow soldier, and your messenger and minister to my need,  for he has been longing for you all and has been distressed because you heard that he was ill.  Indeed he was ill, near to death. But God had mercy on him, and not only on him but on me also, lest I should have sorrow upon sorrow.  I am the more eager to send him, therefore, that you may rejoice at seeing him again, and that I may be less anxious.  So receive him in the Lord with all joy, and honor such men, 30 for he nearly died for the work of Christ, risking his life to complete what was lacking in your service to me.

- From Paul's letter to the Church at Phippi. All verse numbers and paragraph separations deliberately removed.

Underlining added to emphasize the reason this passage from the Bible has been posted here. The entirety of this letter is so precise, concise, and direct, that every word could and perhaps should be underlined.  It isn't because  it  would then be harder to read. I think Paul address to the church hits at the issue of loneliness by showing strongly the goal  each saint has in common with every other saint, as well as the practical command - sacrifice self for others, count others more value than self - in that goal one becomes perhaps the best friend of all people everywhere.

Sacrificing of self  to demonstrate the love of God and the cause of Christ Jesus, is the weaponry  of faith that many may see and hear. it is the testimony of each saint to others that they may then be encouraged  in listening to the Holy Spirit's call to repentance and their turning to Christ Jesus. 

Edited October 19, 2018 by Neighbor