I feel predestined

[Steffenfield]

I don't see myself as an instrument for God.

A tare if you will.

I can't sing.

I can't dance.

I don't have much of a musical talent.

When I watch the worship leaders before any sermon, and how they sing, and move, and give glory to God, that's not something I can do.

I can play piano, but it's never to perfection.

I get that what I see on stage has been greatly practiced beforehand, but even so, I'm not built this way.

All I can seem to do is be sorrowful and constantly filled with regret over past and current choices in life.

I thought that being saved was to be hopeful.

Every day I'm 50/50, at best, on where I'll spend eternity and I can't overcome such thinking.

I just don't have enough to give back in life, and I doubt my odds will ever get better than this.

It hurts.

 

 

 

[Michael37]

1 hour ago, Addison said:

I don't see myself as an instrument for God.

A tare if you will.

I can't sing.

I can't dance.

I don't have much of a musical talent.

When I watch the worship leaders before any sermon, and how they sing, and move, and give glory to God, that's not something I can do.

I can play piano, but it's never to perfection.

I get that what I see on stage has been greatly practiced beforehand, but even so, I'm not built this way.

All I can seem to do is be sorrowful and constantly filled with regret over past and current choices in life.

I thought that being saved was to be hopeful.

Every day I'm 50/50, at best, on where I'll spend eternity and I can't overcome such thinking.

I just don't have enough to give back in life, and I doubt my odds will ever get better than this.

It hurts.

Hi Addison. There's a misconception that the musically gifted, public performers, and professional pulpiteers that dominate congregational meetings are spiritually elevated above the rest of the body of Christ. Believe me they aren't. The list of high profile professing Christians in leadership who transgress and get drawn into sin is ever being added to. Sure we can forgive them but where there is a culture of patronising pride and an "us and them" mentality between the members of the body of Christ this shows that the biblical model for fellowship and association is not being followed. The 12th Chapters of Romans and 1 Corinthians both deal with this at some length, with no mention of musicality.

Rom 12:3-8
(3)  For I say, through the grace given unto me, to every man that is among you, not to think of himself more highly than he ought to think; but to think soberly, according as God has dealt to every man the measure of faith.
(4)  For as we have many members in one body, and all members have not the same function:
(5)  So we, being many, are one body in Christ, and every one members one of another.
(6)  Having then gifts differing according to the grace that is given to us, whether prophecy, let us prophesy according to the proportion of faith;
(7)  Or ministry, let us wait on our ministering: or he that teaches, on teaching;
(8)  Or he that exhorts, on exhortation: he that gives, let him do it with simplicity; he that guides, with diligence; he that shows mercy, with cheerfulness.
Rom 12:15-16
(15)  Rejoice with those who rejoice, weep with those who weep.
(16)  Live in harmony with one another. Do not be haughty, but associate with the lowly. Never be wise in your own sight.
 

 1Co 12:4-7
(4)  Now there are diversities of gifts, but the same Spirit.
(5)  And there are differences of administrations, but the same Lord.
(6)  And there are diversities of operations, but it is the same God which works all in all.
(7)  But the manifestation of the Spirit is given to every man to profit withal.

[Figure of eighty]

I understand your frustrations. I feel 50/50 as well

 

[Sower]

On 1/12/2019 at 1:29 AM, Addison said:

I don't see myself as an instrument for God.

A tare if you will.

 

On 1/12/2019 at 1:29 AM, Addison said:

I thought that being saved was to be hopeful. 

 Hi Addison. First off, you cannot be saved and a tare. It is either or. There's the wheat, these are the sons of the kingdom of God, believers, and the tares are the sons of the devil, lost. In the end, the tares shall be gathered (reaped) by the angels, and cast into the fires. Your Savior will return for you.
Being saved is the greatest hope, and assurance. God is able to keep that which you committed to Him, and not you. His word says this.
When you were saved, as you have said, you became a soldier in the army of Christ. The enemy of Jesus is the devil, therefore your enemy. He, and his army of devils,  goes about like a roaring lion, seeking whom they can devour. Including you. You sound like you are under attack, messing with your mind. False data. You need to remember, your fight is not people, but the unseen world, principalities and powers, devils and demons. Liars. And you are being lied to. You are being told you are worthless, no talent, can't sing, only 50/50. And you believe these lies. You need to gird up your loins, (roll up your sleeves) and fight. Here is God's way; (your in Christian boot camp)

Eph 6:10-18  Finally, my brethren, be strong in the Lord, and in the power of his might.  Put on the whole armour of God, that ye may be able to stand against the wiles of the devil.  For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places.  Wherefore take unto you the whole armour of God, that ye may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand.  Stand therefore, having your loins girt about with truth, and having on the breastplate of righteousness;  And your feet shod with the preparation of the gospel of peace;  Above all, taking the shield of faith, wherewith ye shall be able to quench all the fiery darts of the wicked. And take the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God  Praying always with all prayer and supplication in the Spirit, and watching thereunto with all perseverance and supplication for all saints.

Our enemy, the evil ones army, are hitting you Addison with their fiery darts, lies, and you need to raise your shield of faith to stop/quench them. Faith comes by hearing, and hearing by the word. Study about what we are in Christ, in scripture. Buy some books, E bay used are cheap.  Plenty of books called "The promises of God" or "What we are In Christ", by EW Kenyon is one. On line, type in google "what does God say about blessing a Christian" or something like that. Read the psalms. Continue to ask others.
The enemy cannot kill you, but he can wound you in your heart and mind, with his lies, and only if you believe them, and become discouraged as you appear to be.
In Christ you can do all things. God says so. God is Light. He does not/ cannot lie. All His promises are true. And the more you read them, is like hiding them in your heart, that you may not miss God's targets, or sin. The more truth (scripture) you have stored in your mind, the less susceptible you will be against those fiery darts, accusations, feelings of worthlessness, and you become stronger in your FAITH! Without Faith, we cannot please God.
This is a good step, Addison, reaching out. We have all been there, just like you. You're growing in the word. God says to study to show thyself approved, and not ashamed.
Jesus Christ died for you Addison. You are seated (reserved seat) in heaven. You are not worthless and it is foolish to believe those lies. God loves you so much, he gave His Son, a sacrifice, for you. You belong to God Almighty. Of Great Value!    So be it!!

 

[Willa]

Some people think that if the good outweighs the bad, they will go to heaven.  That is not true.  Only people who are sure they will never be good enough to go to heaven and are totally lost will receive God's mercy.  They stop trusting in their own goodness and know their only hope is if God does something.  So they throw themselves at God's feet and completely surrender to God to do as He wills with them.  At some time in all this they are born again and suddenly understand the Scriptures and know God in a new way.  They come to understand that all God wants of them is their fellowship.  They can't help but tell others about the goodness of God and His love.  They have a new compassion for all.  

No one will ever be good enough to go to heaven.  God doesn't need our talents.  All He wants is all of us.  

[Steffenfield]

Thank you everyone. 

*hugs*

[JohnD]

On 1/12/2019 at 1:29 AM, Addison said:

I don't see myself as an instrument for God.

A tare if you will.

I can't sing.

I can't dance.

I don't have much of a musical talent.

When I watch the worship leaders before any sermon, and how they sing, and move, and give glory to God, that's not something I can do.

I can play piano, but it's never to perfection.

I get that what I see on stage has been greatly practiced beforehand, but even so, I'm not built this way.

All I can seem to do is be sorrowful and constantly filled with regret over past and current choices in life.

I thought that being saved was to be hopeful.

Every day I'm 50/50, at best, on where I'll spend eternity and I can't overcome such thinking.

I just don't have enough to give back in life, and I doubt my odds will ever get better than this.

It hurts.

John 16:26–27 (AV)
26 At that day ye shall ask in my name: and I say not unto you, that I will pray the Father for you:
27 For the Father himself loveth you, because ye have loved me, and have believed that I came out from God.

In the Father's eyes, this places your worth above all else in heaven and Earth besides Himself and other believers.

Anything else we have going for us is icing on the cake.

[frienduff thaylorde]

On ‎1‎/‎13‎/‎2019 at 2:18 PM, Willa said:

Some people think that if the good outweighs the bad, they will go to heaven.  That is not true.  Only people who are sure they will never be good enough to go to heaven and are totally lost will receive God's mercy.  They stop trusting in their own goodness and know their only hope is if God does something.  So they throw themselves at God's feet and completely surrender to God to do as He wills with them.  At some time in all this they are born again and suddenly understand the Scriptures and know God in a new way.  They come to understand that all God wants of them is their fellowship.  They can't help but tell others about the goodness of God and His love.  They have a new compassion for all.  

No one will ever be good enough to go to heaven.  God doesn't need our talents.  All He wants is all of us.  

The hour that grace appears .    IS the moment that our conscious was even first Stirred BY HIM .    ONLY the goodness of GOD can lead one to repentance .  Only God can even draw us .

Their is only one who is GOOD enough for heaven .   And that ONE came to save his sheep .   From Him we know have the grace given us In Christ to serve God acceptably

and reverently in godly fear .   Yes it is through Christ alone this is possible .   And it is POSSIBLE for as I said , ITS ONLY THROUGH CHRIST .    Now put those hands up and praise the Lord willa .    I remember clearly that day on may thirtieth of two thousand and six .    Just a regular evil sin filled day like any other ,

But then a stirring began  and new desires given .   THAT stirring was not me , my flesh ,   IT WAS THE SPIRIT and the drawing HAD BEGAN .    We are saved soley by grace .

Hands up sister .    

[Who me]

On 1/12/2019 at 7:29 AM, Addison said:

I don't see myself as an instrument for God.

Why not?  Can you pray intelligently for others, can you live a life that is different from that of nonchristians, can you love and care for the unlovely people and have the courage to gosip about Jesus and what he means to you?

Serving God is more than looking beautiful while singing to glorify oneself.

may I suggest you read christian biographies and look out for the helpers.

Every great Christian is enabled to be great because he/she is aided by co workers, often unoticed, but doing vital work in the background.

Look out for them in your church as they put out tables, take away chairs, tidy up, wash up, get there early to prepare for a service, the ones who are Always at the prayer meetings, Always there on Sunday, Always there, Always helping.

 

A thought for you. What did Jesus mean when he said ' the first will be last and the last will be first.'

Was it purely a thing to do with time or about our idea of who is important?

[JustPassingThru]

On 1/11/2019 at 9:29 PM, Addison said:

I don't see myself as an instrument for God.

A tare if you will.

I can't sing.

I can't dance.

I don't have much of a musical talent.

When I watch the worship leaders before any sermon, and how they sing, and move, and give glory to God, that's not something I can do.

I can play piano, but it's never to perfection.

I get that what I see on stage has been greatly practiced beforehand, but even so, I'm not built this way.

All I can seem to do is be sorrowful and constantly filled with regret over past and current choices in life.

I thought that being saved was to be hopeful.

Every day I'm 50/50, at best, on where I'll spend eternity and I can't overcome such thinking.

I just don't have enough to give back in life, and I doubt my odds will ever get better than this.

It hurts.

Hey Addison, here's something Paul taught us, I hope it will encourage you:

Now if any man build upon this foundation gold, silver, precious stones, wood, hay, stubble; Every man's work shall be made manifest: for the day shall declare it, because it shall be revealed by fire; and the fire shall try every man's work of what sort it is. 1 Cor 3:12, 13 

Please notice Paul is talking about building on a foundation, which is Christ, with six common materials used in his time, ...gold. silver, precious stones, wood, hay and stubble.

Now let's ask ourselves which of the six would be the most visible to the public and which would not, ...the gold, silver and precious stones, right? However those three were usually used to cover the wood, hay and stubble, ...what we need to do is determine what do the gold, hay and stubble symbolize in the Church, ...who are the ones most seen by the public, ...pastors, worship leaders, elders, deacons, anyone one serving in ministry in public vue,  so then, who do the wood, hay and stubble symbolize, the saints working behind the scenes, so to speak, ...like was mentioned above, the "can" people, ...that was excellent advice given to you!

Paul finishes with every man's work will be tested by fire, it seems the gold, silver and precious stones people are visible for only a short time during the week (not counting the time they spend alone with the Lord as "can" people), whereas the time "can" people can spend in "ministry" is unlimited, ...so Father didn't infuse music into your DNA, ...but you can write..., also, when you play your piano, Father looks at the heart, so play to Him, ...David wrote, "But thou (Father) art holy, O thou that inhabitest the praises of Israel."  ...brother, you play to Him, you Praise and Worship Him, ...He has promised He will come and you will sense His Presence!

Lord bless