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Kenzie

Self Esteem Really Long....

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Hi I’m 16 and I’ve always struggled with how others see me. Shortly, I’ll just say that i would be very grateful if anyone would pray for me. Thank you. 

 

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I never disclose info like this to my friends or family. My friends (don’t have much transfered recently) would never suspect I have bad anxiety and self esteem issues. So I don’t talk about it to them. And my sister, has never dealt with anything that has caused her to feel inadequate. I’m not trying to pitty myself at all. I honestly haaatee and avoid talking about “bad” things that happened to me or my “issues”. But this school year has been one of the toughest. I’ve been to many schools, often moving because of family issues and money. Middle school years were the toughest. I don’t want to go into details but i was horribly bullied..... Anway my point is not to talk too much about myself because I know that some people have it WAYYY worse than I do. But I’m just giving a little background info. Idk why but I’m the only kid out of 5 In my family who  struggled with self esteem. There WERE days where I wouldn’t go to school and I’ve done horrible things to myself because I’ve felt ugly. But with this new school. No one looks like me, I’ve been to a couple schools that were primarily black or  white or mixed. But at this new school it’s super white. And I don’t have a problem with that except that I wish there were people who looked like me. I feel as if I stand out too much, or that I’m ugly and awkward.😣😣  Idk I feel so out of place. Anyway I just ask that you pray for me. I’ve prayed and I’ve challenged myself by doing activities and getting a job where I work as a cashier to overcome my anxiety and self esteem. But i feel like GOD DOES NOT HEAR ME. So maybe he’ll hear you because I’ve been praying for this issue as long at I can remember. Probably since I was 6. I just cry all the time. I’m so sick of running away from my obstacles. And I hate when I complain because I feel ungrateful, but I can’t deny how I feel. I hate it so much it makes me wanna die 😣 I’m just plagued with these self esteem issues. I feel as if I’m missing out on highschool life. I don’t hang out with old or new friends, don’t join activities, I don’t go to games. I went to a game last Friday and had a panic attack because I felt so ugly and alone. I just don’t know anymore🤧 please pray for me. Any advice is needed. I’m sorry for talking so long. Thanks for all those who prayed for my mother and for me in my last post. I can’t tell you how grateful I am that you guys cared enough to pray for me🤧 it really just lit up my spirit when ever I saw I had a notification. Because lately ive been feeling so alone and seeing those responses just... i cant explain in words, but made me so so s so so happySo thanks so much 💕 

Edited by Kenzie
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Thank you for your kind words @SelahSong 💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕

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Praying

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@PromisesPromises!thank you so much for praying or me💕 and I’ll be sure to listen to  “you say” . 

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