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Earleen

Are any young people saving themselves sexually for marriage anymore?

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On 2/16/2019 at 8:20 PM, Earleen said:

I am so old fashioned, but I still strive to follow the Bible.  It seems as if dating couples, even Christian couples have redefined what is acceptable between a couple sexually before a life long committment.  I believe when one has sex, they have united as one.  I know our culture is so different than Jesus day when girls were married young and parents chose the marriage partners.  Now our young folks have way too much time together which makes it nearly impossible to not get the hormones working.  I have even heard it said that since we have the birth control pills, sex is ok because pregnancy is not longer as much a threat.  Appreciate any comments on your thoughts concerning this growing concern among our youth today.    Ruth Earleen Snider

It is a growing concern. Better churches encourage:

* Accountability

* Couples avoid being alone together, especially late at night

* Open doors to bedrooms, so roommates can see them

* Regular teaching on abstinence, holiness, purity

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I'm both young and a virgin. Though, I wouldn't paint myself as innocent. I was a teenage boy, after all. A non-Christian one, at that.

It may seem like nobody holds out anymore, but there are those that do. It just proves more and more difficult, with this or that hanging or bobbing about, and the morals get more and more loose over time. Before I became a Christian, I remained a virgin due to being a loser in high school, and the few girls who did take interest, I did not reciprocate. I saw one almost like a sister, and the other two smelled like weed and shame. Since becoming a believer, however, I wish to do what must be done according to God's commandment. I also want to appreciate a woman for who she is, not her body nor ease of use.

It's proven a difficult task, but i've come to rely on prayer more than my own willpower over time. I try not to look at certain things, or at least not look overlong. Mistakes happen, but so long as i'm trying to improve, i'd like to think i'll be fine.

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I’m saving myself for marriage and I’ve asked the same question as you. I also feel like there is barely any people my age who plan on waiting and that sorta makes me not want to. I know by not engaging in premarital sex is to honor God and should be the only reason why. but I feel like me waiting may be a waste if the person I marry isn’t. Just my two cents. 

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this has been a really hard subject for me as well with the issue of masturbation,  I've been struggleing with that issue myself,  but I know that through Jesus I can overcome this :)  I feel like I have betrayed my future b/f & husband  by not saving myself for him & only him :( I feel that I need to pray harder

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Hi, nice to meet you and welcome to Worthy Christian Forum. I'm a young teen who still believes and practices what my Bubble teaches regardless of the time. Because i believe that though the world may change, my God and his word never changes. 

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Amen :)

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On 2/16/2019 at 3:20 PM, Earleen said:

I believe when one has sex, they have united as one.

Hi Earleen, welcome to Worthy, ...it seems you have inadvertently hit the proverbial nail on the head, what you have said many believe to be true, they engage in premarital sex because they know they will be marrying, ...actually the Word calls it fornication and since the participants both know it's against the will of God for their lives, it's not a sin, but rather a transgression, ...not a very God way to start a marriage.

A man and a woman enter into a marriage covenant before and with God, ...after that the two consummate their marriage and the two become one flesh.

...a threefold cord is not quickly broken. Ecc 4:12

Lord bless 

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4LdKHVCzRDj2Dove, dr3032, Kenzie, shortangel, LaurenDee, Chrisy : I am proud of you all for making the commitment to wait until marriage! You have support from myself and others on this site. God smiles on us when we put Him first and trust in Him completely. He most certainly is smiling on you all for your commitment to Him. Be encouraged!

I was reading an article that detailed 4 benefits of waiting until marriage (although there are countless benefits. not just 4).

1. Keeps God at the center of your relationship: crucial for establishing a solid foundation for marriage without the distraction of sex.

2. Learn how to talk it out before you walk it out: communication is a vital part of a healthy relationship.

3. Protects you from being attached before you say "I do": sex creates children and a "soul tie," both warrant an attachment for the rest of your life.

4. Incomparable sex in marriage: married people have the best sex! Marital sex is a beautiful encounter ordained by God.

Earleen, I was a virgin until marriage at 26. I'm 31 (a millennial) now and divorced. I have since made mistakes, but I have recommitted to abstain. It's so important and there is no comparison between sex within marital bounds and sex outside of those bounds. God knows best, and what's best for us is that we trust Him.

https://marriedandyoung.com/4-benefits-to-waiting-until-marriage-to-have-sex/

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For those of you abstaining who feel alone--consider your church fellowship CAREFULLY. I'm married with children, but would only attend a true fellowship where the majority of young people and unwed people are abstinent. You need peer counseling from peers who are walking the same way!!!

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