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diane32

This seems to be true...

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I have often wondered if my disobedience to God is the reason my youngest son has suffered so much throughout his life and im really starting to believe that in fact it is true...

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7 minutes ago, diane32 said:

I have often wondered if my disobedience to God is the reason my youngest son has suffered so much throughout his life and im really starting to believe that in fact it is true...

I don’t believe God punishes that way. But each person does reap what they sow, be that either good or bad. 

You can not change the passed, but going forward,  you can do righteousness, and by doing righteousness will the doors of God’s blessings be opened to you. 

(my thinks)

 Blessings, 

Much love in Christ, Not me 

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11 minutes ago, diane32 said:

I have often wondered if my disobedience to God is the reason my youngest son has suffered so much throughout his life and im really starting to believe that in fact it is true...

HI dianne,

The good news is that from now on that can be changed, as you learn to walk closer to the Lord. Your son is also accountable for his own actions. We all have sinned and this has affected every one around us. But the good news is that Jesus is about changing us and thus other relationships can see and learn to follow the Lord too.

Be encouraged for we look ahead and not let the enemy focus us on our past sins. They are covered by the blood of Jesus. So go on now that you are changing and rejoice for you have not stayed in your sin and your son has a wonderful opportunity to see how you have changed.

all the best, Marilyn.

 

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Thank you both.  My son is actually one of the nicest kindest people you could ever meet. He used to react to bullies in extreme ways but I had to learn to discipline him for his reactions so he would stop reacting and they would leave him alone. He learned the right way to stand up to them was simply to let them know he wasn't afraid and that worked. That is only a small piece (although massive to us at the time) of what he endured. He is now in his room not eating much, quiet, extremely shy and very low mood and it is making me think how he ended up like this. The last school he was in the teachers put him in the basement for weeks from 9am to 3pm he never got out of there the whole day and he was mentally affected by this but I prayed and God kept telling me the story of Joseph through different people and he said it to me aswell so we prayed and I believed that maybe he was to endure this for a reason until one day I had to go the school and asked to see the room he was in...the secretary was upset and annoyed at the way my son was being treated and said he is a lovely kid I don't understand why he's being treated this way but I knew it was the enemy and we had to keep praying. I was nearly sick when I saw what they were keeping him in and now the room has been closed off cos it's not fit for humans basically...My son was very close to God but now he says he doesn't believe in Him, he thinks if God was so loving then why did He watch him go through this and not help him etc...I am now wondering was God with us in this or did I let my son go through torment at the hands of these teachers and I think that's why I'm struggling in my walk now too...and I really appreciate your prayers thank you 💕

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1 hour ago, diane32 said:

I have often wondered if my disobedience to God is the reason my youngest son has suffered so much throughout his life and im really starting to believe that in fact it is true...

No, that is not how God works. God has a plan for your son's life. There is a reason your son has suffered and he will not know why until he is with God and his plan is revealed. It is important that your son remains faithful to God throughout his life even through the pain and suffering. 

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3 hours ago, diane32 said:

I have often wondered if my disobedience to God is the reason my youngest son has suffered so much throughout his life and im really starting to believe that in fact it is true...

Shalom diane32,

It is indeed possible.  But either way, if you are walking correctly now, you shouldn't beat yourself up over the matter.  If you are obedient now, you can have a clear conscience towards Yahweh whilst seeking for an answer.

2 hours ago, diane32 said:

He is now in his room not eating much, quiet, extremely shy and very low mood and it is making me think how he ended up like this.

Not everyone is meant to lead the same type of life.  Going to school, doing well, having lots of friends, going to college and find a partner and then eventually kids, is not a successful life necessarily.  Yahweh can train up people in different ways, in different methods for different goals.  It can appear to us as if hope is fading but in the eyes of the Lord all may be going very well.  There are plenty of examples of this in Bible.  Pretty much all the judges, heroes and prophets had non-standard upbringings, lifestyles and "successful youths". 

As for your son, he reminds me of another guy I know.  This other chap thought he couldn't serve God effectively because of his demeanour established in him as a young boy.  However, Yahweh seemed to use him to reach people on the fringe or outskirts of church - that is, those who were straying or lost the faith.  His demeanour was ideal for empathising with these people and for speaking kindly, introspectively and wisely. Now, if you took someone deep in the centre of the church to reach these "fringe Christians", they would probably hit them with scriptures, pamphlets and "praise the Lord!", which would not be effective for that audience.

Therefore, different upbringings, childhoods and demeanours are needed for service in the Kingdom of God.  Not all of us are meant to be the same.  So, if you are now walking correctly with God, you can have a clear conscience on this matter and trust in Him, that He is working with your son's character for a specified purpose - for His glory. 

In terms of your son not believing in Him because of what happened - I would like to recommend the following 3 stories for you, which you can read HERE.  The stories are written to explain to a non-believer why there is suffering in the world and why God allows bad things to happen:

  • Story 1 focuses on Judgement 
  • Story 2 focuses on Love & Fear 
  • Story 3 focuses on Our Responsibility  

Of course, have a look at the stories yourself first before recommending them to your son.  You know him a lot better! :)  Hopefully, they might trigger a new approach of thinking on the matter.

Finally, stay strong and joyful in your faith.  This will serve as a memorable example for your son when he goes through harder times and searches for peace. 

Love & Shalom

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4 hours ago, diane32 said:

Thank you both.  My son is actually one of the nicest kindest people you could ever meet. He used to react to bullies in extreme ways but I had to learn to discipline him for his reactions so he would stop reacting and they would leave him alone. He learned the right way to stand up to them was simply to let them know he wasn't afraid and that worked. That is only a small piece (although massive to us at the time) of what he endured. He is now in his room not eating much, quiet, extremely shy and very low mood and it is making me think how he ended up like this. The last school he was in the teachers put him in the basement for weeks from 9am to 3pm he never got out of there the whole day and he was mentally affected by this but I prayed and God kept telling me the story of Joseph through different people and he said it to me aswell so we prayed and I believed that maybe he was to endure this for a reason until one day I had to go the school and asked to see the room he was in...the secretary was upset and annoyed at the way my son was being treated and said he is a lovely kid I don't understand why he's being treated this way but I knew it was the enemy and we had to keep praying. I was nearly sick when I saw what they were keeping him in and now the room has been closed off cos it's not fit for humans basically...My son was very close to God but now he says he doesn't believe in Him, he thinks if God was so loving then why did He watch him go through this and not help him etc...I am now wondering was God with us in this or did I let my son go through torment at the hands of these teachers and I think that's why I'm struggling in my walk now too...and I really appreciate your prayers thank you 💕

Perhaps you could share all of his with your son, your concern that you believe God wanted to show you how you needed to know Him so He could have mercy on you, and give the greatest thing in life, awareness, and deeper care for our children this way, as the more suffering we go through the more we care for who goes through it, and your son might understand that God wants his mother to never perish and will do all it takes to give her and her children life with Him for ever, and go through the troubles together with your boy, share everything to bring you closer together than ever, and consider like I do, with home schooling if you like.

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5 hours ago, diane32 said:

I have often wondered if my disobedience to God is the reason my youngest son has suffered so much throughout his life and im really starting to believe that in fact it is true...

Jesus' disciples once asked Him a similar question.   They saw a blind man and asked Jesus whose sin had caused this.  See chapter 9 of John for the entire story.

9 As he went along, he saw a man blind from birth. 2 His disciples asked him, “Rabbi, who sinned, this man or his parents, that he was born blind?”3 “Neither this man nor his parents sinned,” said Jesus, “but this happened so that the works of God might be displayed in him. 4 As long as it is day, we must do the works of him who sent me. Night is coming, when no one can work. 5 While I am in the world, I am the light of the world.”  John 9:1-5 NIV

Depending on where you live, there might be other schooling options.  Our youngest daughter informed us a week before her junior year of high school that she wanted to be home schooled because she couldn't stand going to school anymore.  We enrolled her in an online Christian school and she basically did all the work herself for her last two years of high school.   As it turns out, the academic rigor for some classes was much better than she would have gotten in public school.   Though I would say the math and science classes were weak.  She got a formal HS diploma with this.   For what she majored in in college, that ended up being better for her.

 

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5 hours ago, diane32 said:

The last school he was in the teachers put him in the basement for weeks from 9am to 3pm he never got out of there the whole day

Really? wow, what kind of place was that? Are they still doing that  to other kids?

 Seems to me that  much  of the education system in the USA is corrupted by the use of medicines to basically dope up children so that they  are too sleepy and passive to be  of any challenge to today's so called teaching and administrative staff. The families actually get  financial reward for allowing their child to be drugged, and so does the "physician" involved.

May we join in prayer for your child?  I appreciate prayers for my own grandson as he traverses through his own education. He too is different, as he is really a miniature adult and that gives teachers fits sometimes.

 

As to the question: Yes of course our children are affected by their upbringing environment, as much as they are of their genetics too. And yes at some point each of us need stop blaming our own upbringing for our own shortcomings and take responsibility  for ourself. 

Most families that I do meet have concerns today that just didn't happen in the past. Parents are helicoptering their kids today. The kids do not just go out, they have arranged play dates and parents are right over them all the time. It is a time of fear. Sad yet I would not let a child just go out like I did when I was young (back before dirt was created).

At Little League today the parents discuss the great difficulty  of summer time having to arrange  for the kids to "do camps" and having to get them each to organized events and to be volunteers themselves, and to work to support their family. While  when I was a child I would go hitch hiking for the day to see how many different kinds of vehicles would pick me up. We all went together to see if we could make the New Hampshire State line and back before sunset.

You are not alone in your concerns, things really are different today, and it does affect children and parents.

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5 hours ago, diane32 said:

Thank you both.  My son is actually one of the nicest kindest people you could ever meet. He used to react to bullies in extreme ways but I had to learn to discipline him for his reactions so he would stop reacting and they would leave him alone. He learned the right way to stand up to them was simply to let them know he wasn't afraid and that worked. That is only a small piece (although massive to us at the time) of what he endured. He is now in his room not eating much, quiet, extremely shy and very low mood and it is making me think how he ended up like this. The last school he was in the teachers put him in the basement for weeks from 9am to 3pm he never got out of there the whole day and he was mentally affected by this but I prayed and God kept telling me the story of Joseph through different people and he said it to me aswell so we prayed and I believed that maybe he was to endure this for a reason until one day I had to go the school and asked to see the room he was in...the secretary was upset and annoyed at the way my son was being treated and said he is a lovely kid I don't understand why he's being treated this way but I knew it was the enemy and we had to keep praying. I was nearly sick when I saw what they were keeping him in and now the room has been closed off cos it's not fit for humans basically...My son was very close to God but now he says he doesn't believe in Him, he thinks if God was so loving then why did He watch him go through this and not help him etc...I am now wondering was God with us in this or did I let my son go through torment at the hands of these teachers and I think that's why I'm struggling in my walk now too...and I really appreciate your prayers thank you 💕

 

The basement punishment of course sounds Draconian, but there are two sides to every story .What did he do to be placed down there? I would be surprised to discover that it was done purely on a lark.

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